A New Beginning
by ksjf2012
Summary: Logan has a new Job! It's almost his dream job...great hours, great pay a nice friendly boss. Maybe too friendly of a boss for Logan's boyfriend, James. Is jealous the one thing that will make or break them? This is a slash! Jagan and Kenlos! This was requested by HaLoReAcHgirl! Thank you for the request!
1. Chapter 1

"_And with that being said…I bid you a farewell and a happy football Sunday. Come back on Monday morning and we'll discuss highlights and key plays. Send me your tweets and fun game day pictures! Signing off…James Diamond." _ I hurriedly logged off and waited until the red light was off my web cam. I sighed out in relief and sat back in my seat looking down at my hug keyboard. I stifled a yawn and forced my eyes to stay open. I jiggled my left wrists and glanced down at my watch smiling small. He should be home soon. It's almost been two hours and I'm sure he was anxious to get it over with but was way too excited to even get the chance to interview. And I was way too excited to see him and hear about his day. I just needed him home. Now.

I walked up to the first floor of our house and shut the basement door getting that yawn out. Finally. My day wasn't long or super busy by any chance but it was boring without the love of my life asking me silly questions about silly things, and begging me to get him his favorite type of tea on the very top shelf of the pantry. I missed it but I knew it was worth it. He was going to do something that he loved. He was going to take a huge leap and try to get a chance of a lifetime. I was so proud of him for that. So proud in fact, I was going to make us a late lunch/early dinner. I knew exactly the type of meal that would comfort him whether or not he got the job or didn't. My famous spaghetti and meat balls, with my famous garlic bread and my very famous Caesar salad. Okay none of it was famous. The salad was from a bag and the garlic bread was store bought. The only thing I would make would be the meatballs.

I wanted the night to be really special for him because I know how stressed he's been about this. I hated thinking about how worried he was and watched the pot of water boil. I knew it would make the time go by faster and as soon as he walked through that door my worry and depression would be over. As soon as I started thinking about it, I heard the door get pushed open, and our tiny dog barking at the new arrival. I pushed off the counter and walked quickly out of the kitchen towards the front door. "Hi sweetie…yes daddies home. How are you? Okay…come here." I smiled stopping right in front of him and put my hands on my hips. Logan was on his knees, with his briefcase on the floor next to him with our little dog standing on his chest, licking his face. Logan was running his hands up and down the back of our dog with his eyes closed a small, almost painful smile tugging at his mouth. Maybe things didn't go well and he was just barely keeping it together. I swallowed hard and cleared my throat gently. Logan opened his eyes and gently set our dog back down on the ground. "Hey baby…something smells great." I smiled small and moved forward putting out a hand helping him stand. "How was work?" I smiled small and shrugged seeing that same painful smile on his face.

"Fine…how was your interview?" The smile fell off his face and he bowed his head down. This wasn't good. I put a hand on his face and gently pulled him into my chest. "It was just one interview Loges…I know you'll find something eventually." He chuckle quietly underneath me and turned quick bending down by his briefcase. I frowned and put my hands on my hips feeling helpless.

"Yeah I don't think I'll have the heart to find anything else." I opened my mouth to hopefully say something encouraging. "Mostly because…" He stood back up after tossing what looked like a brown paper bag to the floor and turned to me raising a bottle of champagne. "I got the job." His smile grew tenfold and he squeaked loudly. I rushed to him wrapping my arms around his waist and pulling him up fast. He laughed throwing his arms around my neck and forcing his legs around my waist. I closed my eyes, smiling, feeling every ounce of happiness leave my body, just so I could pour it into his body. Our dog is barking at my heels, probably concerned I was hurting Logan. But Logan was clutching onto me laughing quietly running his free hand through my hair.

"I'm so proud of you…So proud Logan." He chuckled loudly once before pushing off my only a little so he could cup my face and lean in and kiss me. I kissed back eagerly setting him back on the floor putting my hands on his butt. He kissed me hard one last time before pushing away and dropping his hands, one still holding the bottle of champagne and grinned up at me.

"Thank you for believing in me. Thank you, thank you so much for putting up with all my bullshit the past week." I chuckled and leaned down again, this time putting my lips on his neck and rubbing my hands over his butt. "It seems a little early for dinner, but I haven't eaten all day because I was afraid I'd throw up in my interview so…when is it going to be ready?" I smiled in my kiss and let him go stand back up straight. I gently tugged the bottle of champagne out of his hand and smiled.

"Waiting for the water to boil. Why don't you get changed out of this suit and into some of my cloths, because you look so cute in them, and I'll open this up and we'll celebrate." He nodded fast and quickly turned and grabbed his briefcase again.

I stood in front of the stove again looking down at the pot of water that was slowly starting to boil, and had to smile. Even though I knew nothing about what Logan would be doing, I knew his title was assistant to the CEO of some huge stock company. I guess that was a huge deal. He would be dealing with numbers and foreign people I guess, which were two things he was incredible at. He was a math genius and fluent in 5 other languages. He taught himself. I swear sometimes I wonder how he makes it through the day with all that knowledge in his head. However he does it, is adorable as hell. "Did you hear form Kendall or Carlos today?" I barely had time to turn around before he got right next to me and hoped up on the counter by the stove. He put his hand sunder his legs and gently swung his legs back and forth. I shook my head putting my hands in the front pockets of my jeans and he frowned. "I talked to Carlos for like…5 minutes before my interview. I told him to call you so we could make plans."

"Plans?"

"Yeah their coming into town. They just got back from some beautiful beach in Mexico and because Kendall's on break because the season's over, they want to see us. I of course had the usual argument with them staying with us instead of some overpriced hotel so we will have guest." I chuckled and went to work on putting the Angel hair pasta into the boiling water. "I think their plane should be landing sometime soon but knowing them they'll take a cab here." I nodded turning back to him. He was staring me down. "How was your show tonight?" I shrugged and yawned backing up into the sink right behind me.

"Same old same old." He frowned almost as soon as I said it and I laughed. "It's alright Logan. I love my job."

"You hate your job."

"I don't hate the pay." He looked down and shook his head. "And I don't hate that I never have to leave the house for my job, or that I ever have to go away form you for a long period of time." He raised his head but turned away from me quick swallowing hard. "Tell me all about your job. What will you be doing exactly?" He sighed out but turned to me and smiled small.

"Well I'm an assistant. I'll probably run coffee, crunch numbers, fight demons after dark." I chuckled out loud and he laughed with me. "It's not the dream and I know I could be doing more with my degree but it's a start and I'm excited."

"Then that's all that matters." He only nodded along in agreement telling me like every time before, he was feeling guilty. Guilty I was stuck in the same mundane job every day. But the truth is, I love sports and I love having my face everywhere. Running a sports talk show form my basement, while getting a very fat check every two weeks from ESPN, was working out quite well for us. We had a two story house, technically three with the basement, two cars in great condition and nice shiny appliances in our home. Like he said, it wasn't the dream, but my dream came and went and now I'm happy with the life I was given. With him. I don't know what I would do if that was taken from me.

We ate dinner in silence but I knew he wasn't all that upset with me or himself because he literally climbed on my lap and put food on one plate, for both of us. While I casually ate, holding around his back, he talked to me about were his job is, how he would have his own office, right next to his boss, and that the company he works for is very gay friendly. There was no discrimination and he would be in a safe environment. I was grateful for that. More importantly, for him I guess, he had the chance of growing with the company, going up on the ladder while sitting on a hard 401K. He could work at this place until he was 62 and retire with a fat stack of cash. Which was important to him. He doesn't think he is worth anything unless he can pay for something. It's frustrating because when we go out, anywhere, he'll try to pay. It's cute every now and then, and I do let him pay sometimes but I've seen him go through hell and back. He doesn't deserve it again.

Even after we ate, we stayed in our seat, him still sitting comfortably on my lap and talked quietly while finishing off the whole bottle of champagne. I was happily content. I could have sat there all night and held around him listening to his soft voice and eventually let it lull me to sleep but he didn't want any of it. He pushed off me drinking the last of the liquid in his glass. He stretched his arms over his head and grabbed our empty plate. "Since you cooked, I clean." I sat back watching him saunter off to the kitchen and yawned.

"You sure?" He only nodded turning on the water, singing quietly to himself. I pushed myself up grabbing my still half full glass of champagne and walked slowly towards Logan's laptop open up on the coffee table, where he left it this afternoon before he left for his interview. I sat down in front of it and quickly logged him out of his email and logged into mine. I of course had a thousand hate and fan mail from viewers and ignored them form now, looking from one form my boss, who would give me the latest breaking news in the sports world and critique my last show. When I saw his email I clicked it open quick. I scanned over his usual lines taking mental notes here and there. When I got down to the last paragraph I still scanned over the words but something caught my eye. I saw Job opening, and "you have the job". I froze up going back to re-read the paragraph and felt my throat swell up. There was an open position at the actual ESPN studio in New York and they were so desperate they would pay for me, and Logan to come out, and put us up until we found our own place. The pay was higher and it would be amazing benefits. He said they would need an answer by Monday and there was no pressure to actually say yes or no. I slowly sat back on the couch and breathed out low and quiet.

I glanced out to the kitchen and watched as Logan danced around it, singing to himself still. He had a goofy little grin on his face, probably thinking about the amazing job he got today. He was probably mentally planning the rest of our lives and was probably so excited anything, at all, that might mess that up, would kill him. Like me getting a job offer all the way across the country. There was no way I could take this job. Especially now.

**So this was requested by HaLoReAcHgirl. You said you wanted a Jagen with a jealous James and this is what I came up with. I honestly didn't think I'd make it a chapter story but I have and I have this whole story planned out. It's going to be romantic and sweet, with drama and hurt feelings and even some action. I hope everyone likes it! **


	2. Chapter 2: Minnie Fridge

Something smells delicious. Something was wrong. I was alone in bed. And when I opened my eyes, it was still dark out. Turning to my alarm clock, my suspicion was even great seeing it was just now five. I still had 30 minutes of sleep before I should be up to get ready for work…I jumped out of bed quick and turned on the light by my bed. I started work at 8! My first day at work and it's today! No wonder I woke up! My brain is way too excited! But then again…I heard soft laugher from down stairs and remembered my amazing boyfriend and my two best friends. I quickly pulled on one of James's shirts which was too big for me and hurried down stairs, only in my boxers still. I had to smile even bigger seeing the three standing around the kitchen doing things here and there. Kendall and James were facing the stove both holding spatulas while Carlos was in front of the sink washing what looked like grapes. I frowned and walked down the rest of the stairs and put my hands on my hips. "What are you guys doing up so early?" They all turned to me, smiles as big as the kitchen itself. I walked completely in the kitchen and got right next to James setting my head on his shoulder yawning. He and Kendall were cocking a huge breakfast…French toast, bacon, sausage, eggs and hash browns.

"Well…" A hand slipped around my back and rested on my hip pulling me into James's strong body, tight and hard. "It's your first day of work and I know how nervous you probably are so I managed to get these two up to help me make you a healthy breakfast and filling lunch."

"I hope you like apples! And grapes…it's all you guys have." I peered around James's shoulder wrapping my warms around his waist and smiled at Carlos who was wearing what looked like Kendall's shirt and sweats. I smiled and squeezed James a little tighter. "Oh and we already decided were all going to drop you off at work so we can all pick you up and then we can go to dinner. Mine and Kendall's treat."

"Mostly mine…I'm the one who brings home the bacon." I closed my eyes turning my head back to face the front and set it perfectly under James's chin. He set it on my head and rubbed over the shirt on my hip. I raised one hand, running it up and over his bare stomach with the delicious 8 pack I liked to claim as mine, all the way up to his chest. I stopped over his heart and yawned again snuggling hard into his warm skin.

"How is bacon or sausage or French toast healthy?" I whispered it into his skin making him laugh. I glanced up at his face and stood on my tippy toes, kissing his soft perfect cheek. "I'm gonna hop in the shower real quick. And then you have to help me with my hair." He only nodded; eyes closed he turned to me, kissing my lips softly. I hugged him tight, pulled away, walked to Kendall first, hugged him, making him groan and turned to Carlos, also hugging him. I walked out of the kitchen slowly and made my way back upstairs being followed by our small fat little pug, Romeo. He was snorting and yawning at the same time and when we got in my room he jumped on our unmade messy bed and circled around for a minute before falling onto James's side of the bed and sighing out closing his eyes. I rolled my eyes flicking the light on in the master bathroom and ran a hand through my hair already feeling the butterflies flutter in my stomach.

While in my shower I thought about the weekend I just went through with my two best friends, who I hadn't seen a while, and the love of my life, and tried to get my nerves to calm down. When Kendall and Carlos came on Friday night we got drunk and reminisced. Saturday morning we went out ot breakfast and then unfortunately, especially for Kendall and I, we went shopping. For me. For work clothes. I was happily content with wearing the suites I already had but James was convinced I would be happier and well received if I had a "sharp" suite. I had no idea what he meant and while they dragged me along to every store buying a tie here a pair of shoes here, and slacks there, Kendall and I mocked our very obvious "gay" boyfriends as Kendall called them behind their backs. They caught on however and punished us by making us buy dinner that night which was really just Kendall because he thought it was silly I would spend any of my money, seeing as he's the professional athlete. And then Sunday rolled around and for the most part we took it easy. We did go to a secluded quiet L.A. beach to tan, surf, have a picnic, but it was pretty much an easy day. It was a stress less weekend that mentally prepared me for today. Monday, the day I started my first important job. The one that could map out the rest of my life. That thought hit me hard last night as we went to bed but James has a way of making everything seem okay. I'm not sure if it's the way he talks, or how he looks me in the eyes when I talk but he chased all my fears and worries away. And then we had awesome sex. Perfect ending to a perfect weekend.

I decided not to dress in my work clothes before I ate, so I changed into a pair of clean boxers and some of James's basketball shorts. I also slipped on one of his many hoodies and walked down with my comb. As soon as I got down stairs I practically skipped to the kitchen table and sat next to Carlos who was doing something on his phone while drinking coffee. James and Kendall were still in the kitchen but when James saw me sit down he walked out two mugs of steaming coffee in his hands. I smiled big and toothy and raised my comb. He chuckled and set the mugs down taking the comb from my hand. "When will you ever learn to do your own hair?" I closed my eyes and grabbed my coffee cup sipping it slowly as the comb started to run through my still wet hair. "Kendall I swear to God if you burn those eggs…" I opened my eyes setting my mug back down on the table and pulled my legs up on the chair and crossed them setting my hands in my lap. I bit my bottom lip feeling him turn me slightly away from Carlos to face him. He bent at the waist and ran the comb through my hair while pushing some hair away off my forehead. "You used my body soap didn't you?"

"And your shampoo and conditioner." He smirked leaning in quick and kissed my nose. "I'm nervous." He stopped fast and looked me square in the eyes completely stone face. "What if I fail? What if I mess up so bad, I get fired?" He went back to combing my hair to the side and up, I assume, which he always does when he does my hair. He claims it looks sexy. I think it makes me look like an even bigger nerd.

"If you fail? Well I leave you and get in a serious, and very complicated relationship with Carlos and Kendall." I heard laughs from behind me and looked down. "I honestly didn't know you knew the word fail, because everything I have ever seen you do has been works of art, and complete master pieces. And I know today will be nothing short of a master piece."

"I'm just making coffee." He stopped again and got down on his knees setting his hands on top of mine, in my lap.

"No you're not just making coffee. You are making coffee for one of the wealthiest, smartest stock brokers west of New York. This is your foot in the door. And it's the chance of your lifetime." I smiled big and grabbed his face just to kiss his lips hard and before he could stand back up.

"You listened to me?!" He laughed and nodded combing through my hair again. "You never cease to amaze me handsome."

"Back at ya baby."

After a full, loud breakfast with the best people in the world, I went upstairs, James right behind me and got ready for work. I had black slacks, with a white button up shirt and a black suit jacket with a beige tie. He tightened my tie and brushed off my shoulders while I spritzed on some cologne he had bought me this past Christmas. I looked at my reflection one last time smiling small. I watched from behind me in the mirror, James as he got changed in tight blue jeans, and the huddle I had just been wearing, with a white tank top underneath it. We walked down stairs handing in hand, with my messenger bag in the other hand, and James's shoes in his other hand. I walked into the kitchen while James sat at the dining room table putting on his shoes. I poured some coffee into a to go coffee cup and heard movement out in the living room. I glanced out and smiled small seeing Kendall and Carlos. Carlos was leaning against the back of the couch fully dressed with Kendall in front of him. Kendall had his hands on Carlos's hips and was either whispering something in his ear or sucking on his neck. From the stupid goofy look on Carlos's face, I had to assume Kendall was sucking on his neck. James stood up and pushed his wallet and keys into the front pocket of his jeans and turned to them. "Hey…put your dick back in your pants. I don't want Logan to be late on his first day." Kendall straightened up quick still keeping his hands on Carlos who blushed and pushed Kendall away softly.

We all got in James's truck with him driving and me in the passenger seat. My palms were sweaty and my heart was racing. I hadn't had a whole lot of time to get to know my new boss in the interview but as far as I could tell he seemed fairly laid back with a good attitude about his job. I just didn't want to ruin this and started to over think about what I would say to him. I didn't want to come off pushy or like a know it all but also didn't want to seem stupid. What was the middle ground? How could I sound smart but not like a douche bag? Unfortunately I didn't have any time to think about it anymore because the car stopped and James cut the engine. We were in front of the huge 23 story building with 10 minutes before I actually had to be at work. I sighed out shakily and glanced up at the building swallowing hard. There was a soft hand on my knee and a gentle squeeze. I closed my eyes and bowed my head sown laughing at myself. "It's just a job. The worst that could happen is I could get fired." I heard laughs from behind me and turned quick opening my eyes, glaring at them. Carlos elbowed Kendall and took off his seatbelt. I turned to James who smiled and reached up brushing hair off my forehead. His thumb rubbed under my eye and leaned into me kissing my nose.

"You're going to have a great day. I believe in you and I love you with all my heart. Go kick ass baby." I smiled and threw my arms around him hugging him tight. He kissed the side of my head dropping one hand down to my seatbelt and unbuckling it. We pulled away, I gave one last smile to my best friends in the back and pushed my door open. I stepped out getting my lunch from Carlos who then jumped in the front seat telling Kendall to wish me luck. I chuckled holding onto the strap of my bag and shoved my lunch into it. James turned his truck back on waving and smiling small. I smiled back and turned walking to the front doors quick. I pulled out the temporary badge they gave me when they gave me the job and walked in the automatic doors smiling at the nice lady at the front desk. I showed her the badge and she stood up quick gathering some papers from her desk. She told em to show my badge to every security officer I passed by and asked me to go straight to my office where my boss would be. She handed me a thick stack of paper, that I had to fill out for HR. I nodded, feeling slightly overwhelmed and headed to the elevator. I got to it just in time and walked in with about 8 other people. I was pushed to the back and felt panicked again but a nice looking man asked for floor numbers and I squeaked out 18. I glanced to make sure it was clicked and bit my bottom lip looking anywhere but at the fancy, business people around me. I felt so…out of place. Even when people got off on this level and that, it still felt crowded and I wanted to cry. Actually I wanted to hold my big strong tough boyfriend while he sang to me. It made me smile to think about it I almost missed my level. But the same man who pushed the number 18 told me it was my floor and I pushed past two huge guys in black suits and got out of the elevator. I sighed out, glancing around again and remembered where my boss's office was, which I had interviewed in, and walked to it. Right before his office I was stopped dead in my tracks. There was a door closed which wasn't weird but on the name slab attached to the door was…my name. Like, my whole, real name. My mouth went dry and I felt speechless. Right underneath my name was assistant to CEO. I knew I got my own office but I didn't know it was this…

"Logan Mitchell! 8 minutes early!" I looked to my boss's office fast and forced a confused but happy smile.

"Mr. Louis…what is this?" I pointed to my door and he stopped in front of me shaking his head, smiling. I swallowed hard and couldn't stop staring. At his perfect beautiful face. He had a sort of silver fox thing going on. It was weird because his hair was pushed up and back sort of like how I had it, and not only did it look sexy (on him) it helped give a nice curve to his face. It made his cheek bones pop out, and extenuate his jaw line. He had light blue eyes that glistened when he smiled and when he got closer to me putting one hand on my shoulder pushing me to my office I could see a five o clock shadow on his chin and jaw.

"This is your office Logan. Because you're working for the best, you deserve the best." He opened my door for me and let me walk in first. My office was…stunning. There was a nice cherry oak desk in one corner with a new Mac computer sitting perfectly on top. In the corner by the desk was a filing cabinet. On the other side of my too big of an office was a nice black leather couch and a cherry oak coffee table. There were three lamps around the room all on giving off a nice ambience. "My last assistant broke his computer out of a fit of rage and almost burned this room down so we re did everything and got the latest in technology. You have any and everything you could need in this room. Over here…" He walked to the couch but got around it pushing open a sliding door hidden within the wall. My mouth dropped open as I walked slowly towards him. He put his hand sin his pockets and smiled at me. "Logan…working for me is the best decision you could have ever made." I continued walking to him until I stopped in front of the secret hole in the wall. There was two bookcases, empty for now. In the middle of the bookcases, was a medium sized refrigerator. On top of the refrigerator was a small shelving area with a clear door over it. There was a coffee pot, high technology obviously, and a few other things here and there. I turned to my boss quick who laughed and took one hand out of his pocket grabbing the papers in my hand. "We'll set all your stuff down in here, I'll get you a pad of paper with a pen and we'll go start doing some work. I'm going to need some numbers done by today and I need you to come to a meeting with me, to negotiate something's with a French man." He walked my papers to my desk and set them down while I quickly put my lunch in my own Minnie fridge in my own freaking huge office! I closed it quick and walked to my desk putting my bag on the desk. He motioned me to follow him out so I did with a huge excited smile on my face.


	3. Chapter 3: Over Reacting

"Can I get an iced tea with lemon and no sugar…thanks." The guy nodded and smiled looking across at the table. I sighed and kicked up both my legs hitting two knees. Kendall and Carlos pulled away from their smooched faces and blushed clearing their throats. "You know what…just two cokes for them. Thanks man." The guy laughed but nodded and walked away shaking his head. "If I had known you perverts were going to be like this I would have not offered to buy you lunch."

"Kendall doesn't know how to keep his hands or his lips to himself. Not my fault."

"You're just jealous Logan isn't here because if he was you'd be doing the same thing." I rolled my eyes and looked down at my menu sighing softly. "So…who was on the phone bro?" Kendall leaned back putting one arm around Carlos's chair and stared at me. "You said sorry but no thanks…what was that about?" Carlos slowly raised his head along with a questioning eyebrow. I swallowed hard knowing if I said anything that might hurt…or upset Logan, Carlos would be on top of me "beating" me as best as he could. Carlos and Logan were close.

"Well…I got a job offer in New York for Sports Center. I turned it down." Both their mouths dropped open and I put my face back into my menu trying to figure out what sounds good for a light lunch. I guess I could do a sandwich because we've been walking around L.A. since dropping Logan off at work but then again, maybe a salad would be better because I didn't want to fill up for dinner.

"Dude…that would be an amazing job for you." I looked up quick at Kendall who was now glaring at me. Like I just told him…hockey is stupid or something. "I know it's not the greatest place because it's s far from here, but that would be awesome for you."

"Yeah but Logan's job is here. And my life is here. It would be a stupid decision and I decided not to do it. Plain and simple."

"Well I can't imagine Logan being behind that 100%..." I looked to Carlos and felt a little bad for not telling him but I knew what it would cause to tell him. "Oh wait…you didn't tell him, right?"

"Well obviously he did because he turned it down."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? I can't make my choices without Logan's approval?" Kendall raised his hand sin defense and shrugged.

"You're words not mine." I tossed my menu on the table making Carlos sigh and stare back at his boyfriend.

"Don't be a jerk. All I'm saying is Logan likes to be informed in your life James. It's a strong point in your relationship. Even if you truly didn't want to take the job, you should have told him about it." It was unbelievable. It was like Carlos knew everything going through my mind without me saying one word. It was a quality I loved about him. Well and that he looks out for Logan at every chance he got. "That would be like Kendall keeping something huge form me like that. I would be so mad he didn't even have the balls to tell me." Carlos said the last bit with a hint of ice in his voice while staring back at him. "Like your real motive for coming out here." I sat up slowly, left eyebrow raised and saw Kendall clench his jaw also sitting up. "Go ahead Kenny…tell James why we came out. Tell James why you are suddenly interested in L.A.s real estate." I set my elbows on the table looking between my two suddenly pissed off best friends. When he didn't say anything away Carlos shook his head and looked back to me. "Kendall has something wrong with his heart. He can't play any more." It felt like my entire head was knocked off my body and my heart stopped. Kendall looked away still clenching his jaw. "As he put it, he wants to move out here so we can be closer to you guys incase his heart gives out or something and I'm not left alone. Real considerate aint he?"

"Dude…"

"He's over reacting James." Kendall finally faced me and forced a fake smile. I still saw the pain and maybe fear in his eyes. "The doctors are still running tests. They know for sure something is wrong with it, but nothing is certain. As a precaution they don't want me playing one of the most brutal games in professional sports. I'm sure everything will come back squeaky clean and in the mean time I was just thinking of moving back to the golden coast to see you guys some more and get a nice big house on the beach for my stubborn and paranoid and adorable boyfriend and I to grow in."

"I swear to God Knight…" Carlos picked up his glass of water and sipped it while Kendall leaned in and kissed his cheek.

"Whoa...back up a sec guys. Kendall…are you alright? I mean…what started it?"

"Nothing right now James. It's okay. I just started having horrible chest pains after games and practice and sometimes they would make me weak and sometimes they would make me cough really bad. I went to the team physician who sent me to a doctor and I'm here now. Everything is fine. I'm too young and too good looking to croak now." I rolled my eyes and smiled small. He might have a heart condition but it won't stop his ridiculous sense of humor. Carlos on the other hand didn't find it funny and turned to him quick, anger written all over his face. Kendall leaned in again to steal another kiss but Carlos turned his attention to the waiter who was setting our drinks down smiling.

"Alright guys…you need some more time deciding?" I shook my head and picked up my menu.

"I'll have the soup and salad of the day." He nodded writing it down and taking my menu turning his body towards Kendall and Carlos.

"He's going to have the bacon cheeseburger, no onions, and no mayo with fries, and I'm going to have the meatloaf meal. Please." I smiled small watching Carlos melt away his anger when Kendall order his favorite to the waiter. Kendall sat back in his chair picking up his glass and sipped it watching the waiter walk away. Carlos also grabbed his glass smiling small and leaning back into Kendall who chuckled, more to himself wrapping around him. "When I hear anything, I'll let you know." I nodded slowly. "But not James, my sports reporter friend. James, my best friend who can't tell a soul." I raised my left hand and crossed my heart with my right hand. Kendall laughed and sighed out looking around the restaurant.

While we waited for our food we made small talk, no one bringing up the small chance one of my closest friends might not be healthy as he made everyone think. It worried me and I knew exactly what it would do if Logan heard about it. Do I risk it and tell him Kendall not be okay and have him find out the hard way? Or do I leave him in the dark. Either way I'd be fucked. Logan's really close with Carlos but Kendall and him have an odd relationship. They've known each other longer than any else of us, and lived next door to each other since they were two. Their moms are best friends and their dads would drive them to hockey practice and then take them out for hot chocolate afterwards. The first time Logan got a bully problem, Kendall was there to stick up for him. He got put in the time out corner in kindergarten for pushing the kid down and he's still proud of himself for that day. So if Logan were to find out something was wrong with Kendall…it would crush Logan to the point of not being okay, for a long time. "So…what do you know about Logan's job, and his boss?" I snapped out of my thoughts and frowned at Kendall. He laughed sitting up and grabbed Carlos's hand lacing their fingers together. I was getting a little sick of all their lovey dovey cute crap, but let it slide. "I mean…I run background checks on all the people Carlos comes in contact with. Just to make sure he's safe."

"No because you're a prick." Kendall let Carlos's comment slide and I laughed.

"I haven't run any background checks. I just know he works for a huge company for a guy name Louis Stevens. Logan said the guy told him to call him Mr. Louis. Pretty formal and casual I guess so he won't work Logan to death hopefully. He also said he thinks he's gay which can either be a good thing or a bad thing but I trust Logan." Before either of them could say anything our waiter came to the end of our table and started putting out plates in front of us. We all smiled warmly at him and I thanked him but he frowned and put his tray down at his side.

"I'm sorry…I don't mean to interrupt or stick my nose in your business but did you say Mr. Louis? As in Louis Stevens of CbV Financial Corp?" I nodded slowly and he rolled his eyes pooping out his left hip. "I know you trust your boyfriend I assume, but that doesn't mean he can't be swayed." I opened my mouth ready to start yelling at this douche but he beat me to it. "Mr. Louis as a way of…convincing guys to do whatever his tiny little brain desires. He didn't hire your boyfriend because he's smart, even thought he'll tell him that. He hired him to have a nice little…toy during the work day. And he'll start off by buttering you up with your own office with the latest in technology, and he'll let you slide past stupid shit and make other employees do your work just so you can go run errands with him. Then he'll suggest you move into his office with him so you guys could work closer together to get things done better and faster but that ends up being banging on his desk every day after everyone else goes home. Forget about a boyfriend or any social life outside Mr. Louis's. He tells you he loves you and just like that you're his. You either play along with his game or you're fired."

"Let me guess…you were the guy before Logan?" Our waiter turned to Kendall and smiled.

"I left my boyfriend for Louis. I moved in with the bastard hoping to get ahead by sucking his dick and look where it got me." My mouth dropped open and he smiled around at all of us. "Let me know if you guys need anything else." He turned sassily and walked away fast. I helplessly turned to Kendall and Carlos who were…eating. Like everything that guy just told me wasn't ground breaking and Earth shattering. To me, it sounded like Logan had already had an affair. But that wasn't Logan. He wasn't that kind of guy. He couldn't do anything like that to me.

I ate, hardly any of my food, my mind and stomach somewhere else in complete silence. Carlos and Kendall talked and laughed quietly telling me every way and then the guy was just bitter for being fired and to trust Logan. I did. I sure did trust him but I suddenly wasn't a fan of him working. With our waiter came back, Matt, he gave the check to Kendall who demanded it and turned to me waiting for Kendall to pull out some money. "When Logan decides he can get farther with Louis come find me here." He gave me a flirty smile that painfully reminded me of Logan. I dumbly watched him walk away and felt like my heart was ripped out.

"Well he gets off in three hours…we spent more time here then we planned but we can go to the mall or something I guess." I blindly agreed and followed them out of the restaurant wondering why Logan hadn't called or even text just to say his day was going great. I let Kendall drive and sat in the back hoping the next three hours went fast.

I let my mind go numb with no thoughts or worries as I walked next to Kendall as we made our way around the huge two story mall. They would go in a few stores pointing things out to each other every now and then and share secret glances with cute smiles. That was half the reason I didn't want to think about Logan and his…boss. But when Kendall told me it was 4:45 and we should be heading back downtown to pick him up my heartbeat picked up speed. I stayed in the backseat as we parked in a timed spot and Carlos got out to pay for it. Kendall asked me one last time if I was alright and I nodded once, not letting one word slip out of my mouth. I waited patiently and stared out my window like a lost dog. Something weird was happening to me. It was a feeling I had felt before. Many times actually. And this feeling always came when Logan was around another other man. I felt this way sometimes when he was around Kendall or Carlos, especially Kendall. But it has never been this bad before. This was bad. This was the first time, in a long time where I was jealous to the point of oozing out green slime. I just wanted to lock Logan up and keep him as mien forever, with no one touching or seeing him ever. All mine. "Here he comes…5 on the dot." I sat up quick and took my seatbelt off. I put on a big, huge fake smile and opened the back door. When he spotted us he walked over quickly smiling ear to ear. At least he had a good day. But seeing him made my smile fade. He had a decent sized box in his arms with his messenger bag, full to the brim of paper over his shoulder and his jacket lying on top of the box. His sleeves were rolled up on his arms and his hair had fallen flat. His tie was loose around his neck, and he looked exhausted, yet I had never seen him more adorable.

"Hi baby. Long day?" I quickly took the box from him as he got closer and pushed it on the floor of the back seat. I turned back to him and let him collide into my body wrapping around my torso.

"Long exhausting and killing day. But…it was so worth it. I've already done so much James. I mean I feel like I could easily run this company already. I had to negotiate with a French guy today and my boss told me he was so impressed as soon as a higher job was open to actually work for the company instead of him, he was going to put my name into the mix!" I forced my pained smiled again kissing his head and hugging him tight. "And I know this might sound odd but I'm actually excited I have to do work tonight! I mean, it's not a lot and it's mostly things for HR, but I actually get to be an active member of society." I chuckled over him and let him push off me. "And on top of al that, on Saturday I was invited to a company party and I can bring friends, and a date so get your tux out." I frowned and took his bag off his shoulder helping him in the back of the truck. He said his hi's to Kendall and Carlos who joked about him being a nerd. He sat down sighing softly and put his head back yawning.

"My tux? Sounds formal. Will I be able to meet your…boss?" I got stupid looks from Kendall and Carlos but shook them off.

"You will be able to meet everyone I work with. You guys to. If you're still hear that is. When are you guys going back to Minnesota?" The whole truck went quiet and Kendal gripped the steering wheel looking at Logan in the rearview mirror.

"Actually…Carlos and I need to talk to you about something." I quickly grabbed Logan's hand and squeezed making him sit up and turn worried very quickly.

"What's wrong? What's going on?" I looked to Kendall unable to believe he'd want to get the third degree from Logan right now but decided to stay out of it. I would rather be there as his shoulder then his punching bag when he found out Kendall kept it from him for this long.


	4. Chapter 4: Personal Life To Work

"Stop looking at me like that." I bit my bottom lip and crossed my arms over my chest. He popped an almond in his mouth glancing around our kitchen. I moved in closer to him and batted my eye lashes. He looked back down at me and sighed out putting a hand on my shoulder. He pulled me in hard and I wrapped around him tight closing my eyes. "Loges…it's a simple fix. I have to take medications and take it easier. I'm going to be fine."

"This is serious Kendall. You have a heart disease. If you don't take the pills, or work out to hard you could have a heart attack and die. You have less blood flow to your heart which means your body is going to try to fight harder to keep your heart pumping…"

"Logan…Logan…just stop. Your reacting worse than Carlos." I pushed away from him and frowned. He chuckled and brushed my left shoulder, probably to get dust or a wrinkle out of my suite jacket. If he thought I was over reacting now, he should wait to see me when he gets his medication and I ride him on being proactive about it.

I was physically upset when Kendall told me on Monday and even got worse when he got the call on Tuesday form his doctor telling him he had Angina. It wasn't serious because he is so young, but he was going to need to take pills and whenever he felt the chest pains and had trouble breathing during a workout or practice (because he got the okay to play still) he had to use this spray of nitroglycerin and had to sit down for at least 5 minutes. When he explained everything to Carlos and I, Carlos asked if that meant he was okay and I quickly went into explain everything. I was still scared. If something serious happened to Kendall and Carlos wasn't there or someone on the team, Kendall could go into Cardiac arrest. That thought wasn't okay in my mind. Kendall was my brother. I don't know what I would do without him. "Don't you know everything about this?" I nodded leaning into him and rested my head in the crook of his neck. "Okay so you should know that I'm going to be okay then. Even if something happens. I'll be okay Loges."

"Besides…" We pulled away slowly and watched James walk down the stairs his white button up shirt on with his phone in one hand and his jacket in the other. "I just heard form a little birdie the kings are thinking about calling you to make a deal." I turned to Kendal to see him smile and nod his head. "I know the Wild is your team but if you and Carlos want to come out here, it would be the better option."

"I'll probably be getting a call Monday from my manager. What do you think man…be a King?" I turned to James and watched as he slipped his coat on, trying not to touch his beautiful hair. He chuckled and brushed down his lapels.

"We'll they have a young team. But their fast and great hockey players. They won the Stanley cup last year. You could probably teach those boys a few things." Kendall laughed and I sighed crossing my arms over my chest. "Listen sad puppy eyes…we're going to a party tonight and you are going to have a good time. Even if it means I get you drunk."

"We'll you'd have a better chance of getting laid. Logan's loose when it comes to liquor." I gave him a dirty look before turning to James and pouting out my bottom lip.

"You gonna let him talk about me like that?" James smiled and pulled me in slipping one hand into the back pocket of my pants. I felt him move a little and heard a little grunt from Kendall followed by both of them laughing. I turned just in time to see James's fist get lowered and Kendall rub his arm. I smirked with satisfaction and hugged around James. "Is Carlos still getting ready? I don't' want to show up to late." I heard Kendall sigh and watched over James's shoulder as Kendall walked out of the kitchen. James's other hand gently rubbed up and down my back as he sighed over my head.

"So…this week went pretty fast and you got buys after each day so you never really got a chance to talk to me about your boss. I mean…how is he? He treating you nice?" I rolled my eyes and pushed away from him turning straight to the fridge. I pulled it open and grabbed a bottle of water. "I'm just curious about the man. I mean I'm going to be meeting him for the first time tonight. I don't want to go in blind."

"You know what you need to know about him?" I turned quick and shut the fridge door with my butt. "He's a sweet, good looking guy who wants me to succeed in his business."

"Why do you have to bring up that he's good looking?" I scrunched my eyebrows together and put my bottle to my lips. "Okay I'll just meet the guy. But he looks at your cute little butt once I'm throwing fists."

The car ride was full of talking and loud laughs. It felt amazing. For the first time I was the one taking my boyfriend and my best friends to a party. Usually I'm being dragged along to a-lists parties with rich fancy people who can only talk about their 4 sports cars. Now I'm dragging them to a smart person party. With a bunch of nerds who will talk about numbers and the economy. It will make me feel even better than I do now. I felt even more proud when James could park in my own special spot right next to Louis's spot in the basement garage. I told them about the building as we made our way up to the 18th floor ignoring the nerd remarks from Kendall and James. As soon as we got off the elevator music could be heard along with laughter and loud talking. I laced my hand with James and pulled him along the huge office trying to find the bar, Carlos and Kendall right behind us. When I spotted it I also spotted Louis talking with some of his employees and smiled reaching for a glass of champagne. I saw out of the corner of my eye James grabbing a beer from an ice cooler and looked up to him frowning. He pointed over my head and smiled. "Kenny can't drink cause of his old man heart. He's designated driver tonight." He clinked his beer glass onto my champagne glass and gently kissed my forehead. I heard from behind me Kendall say something about finding a bathroom and Carlos going with but ignored them. I put an arm around James's waist and let him turn us to look out at the party. "Where's your office? I wanna see the place." I smiled and nodded leading him towards my office which was closed and hopefully still locked. I pulled my keys out and unlocked it getting out of the way and letting James walk n first. I followed after and kept my door open flicking on the light. He whistled low and put his free hand in his pocket looking around. "Nice place babe. Guy must be loaded." I rolled my eyes and slowly walked to my desk pulling out my chair. "You have your own couch? Is it real leather?" I shrugged and watched him sit down putting his beer bottle on the coffee table. "I got to tell you baby…this is super nice. Should I be worried this guy is trying to butter you up to get in your pants?" I sighed and set my champagne on my desk standing up. While I walked past my door I closed it but kept it unlocked. I shut some of my blinds and walked to James pushing him back on the couch all the way. He had a cocky smirk I would really like to kiss of his face, but held it together. I climbed on his lap putting my legs outside his and sat down setting my hands on his chest, while his hands went on my thighs. "Hey perv…don't' you think we should be socializing."

"Only if you promise to hold your tongue about my boss." He laid his head back and laughed giving me the perfect opportunity to attach my lips to his neck. I started to suck on his neck bringing my teeth out and biting down on his skin. He groaned out and moved his hands to my ass squeezing softly. He managed to push my crotch down onto his making both of us pull away and groan. I moved my hand sup to his face and held it gently. "Please don't be a jerk tonight. This is where I work with the people I work with." He sat up fast holding around my back and kissed my lips.

"I'll be a good boy. As long as I get a treat when we get home." I giggled letting him kiss harder into my mouth I moaned into his soft lips and melted into him suddenly not wanting to be here. His lips were fast and hot, but so were his hands. I wanted to strip him down and let him fuck em like an animal. But we didn't get further then a hot and heavy make out session because I heard a throat get cleared. I pushed away from his throat and automatically my cheeks went beat red. I jumped off James's lap and straightened my clothes out breathing hard. I swallowed hard starring at my boss who was now smiling, walking into my office.

"It's alright Mr. Mitchell. I understand being in love." I blushed and smiled turning to see James standing up holding his beer again.

"Mr. Stevens, this is my boyfriend James Diamond. James this is my boss Louis Stevens." They both reached out their hands and shook softly. "I'm sorry Mr. Stevens. I should have been out there…" Louis raised a hand and smiled.

"It's alright Logan. At least you showed up." There was an uncomfortable laugh around the three of us making my stomach turn. I really, really hoped James didn't say anything inappropriate. "I know, I know your face from somewhere…" I glanced between my boss and boyfriend and saw James chuckle as he looked down and shifted his feet.

"Yeah. I'm a sports caster for ESPN. I have a web show."

"That's it! Wow! You didn't tell me your dating a sports buff and a celebrity!" I laughed and noticed James shake his head blushing.

"He's also very modest." Louis laughed and I wrapped an arm around his waist. We all went quiet and Louis cleared his throat.

"Well Logan if you wouldn't I have one last thing I need you to do for me before Monday." My mouth parted slightly, and I felt James tense up next to me but Louis smiled. "Just one small thing I need you to do. James can go out and mingle, get another beer and it will be five minutes tops." I smiled quick and turned up to James standing on my tip toes. I kissed his cheek and tapped his butt softly.

"Go find Kendall and Carlos. I'll be done in a minute." He nodded but he did not look happy at all. I let go of him and followed Louis out as he walked to his office door. He unlocked it and let me walk in quick. I sighed out and watched him close his door, and then lock it. That was pretty weird to me but didn't have time to question it.

"SO I need you to write up an email for me. Our newest buyer in France, the one you talked to on Monday has some questions and I of course can't write or read French." I smiled and nodded walking behind his desk and turning on his computer. "I know this sucks because there's a party out there but it will go by fast." I noticed he walked behind me probably looking over my shoulder as I logged into his computer and opened up his email. "Unless…you don't' want it to go by fast." I felt a hand on my shoulder and stopped moving immediately. "You know…when I have someone, like yourself al to myself during the day, my stupid head starts to get attached." The hand that was on my shoulder moved to the back of my neck where his fingers started to run through my hair. "And then to see you, in there with your boyfriend, just upsets me a little." Both his hands moved down quick and rested against the edge of the desk. His head was inches from mine and I could smell his breath which was laced with alcohol and a cigar if I had to guess. "There is a rule in this office Logan and I should have made it clearer to you." I actually felt scared hearing him talk and feeling him so close to me. "I'm not big on having boyfriends or girlfriends, or partners in this office doing what you two were just doing. So don't let it happen again. Do we have an understanding?" I swallowed hard nodding slowly. One of his hands rested on my arm and as he stood himself back up his hand traced up my arm. I breathed out slowly feeling ice run up and down my back. "Good…now why don't you get to writing that email and when you're done you can go get me another glass of scotch."

When I walked out of his office after not only writing back to three emails and redoing his filing cabinet for whatever reason, more people had showed up and it looked like I had been in there for almost an hour. I couldn't get the creepy feeling of what Louis did to me out of my mind but knew I couldn't do anything about it. No one would believe me if someone, like me a new assistant to one of L.A.s wealthiest men, said he was threatened and assaulted, because technically I wasn't either of those things. And maybe Louis was right. I should bring my personal life to my work. I should just be lucky he didn't fire me. I ran into James who was talking to Kendall by the bar quietly. I put on a small smile and grabbed James's hands. He smiled down at me but it faded quick. "Where have you been?! You're missing a pretty boring nerdy party!" I frowned and pulled James in closer to me yawning.

"Sorry I got a little distracted with some work. Hey can we leave soon…I just am more tired than I was expecting." I heard Kendall say something about finding Carlos and let James hold onto me kissing my head. James was going to be the last person I told about what just happened, if I even did tell anyone. Which I probably wouldn't.


	5. Chapter 5: Monday Will Be A Big Day

I've always admired his face. And his heart and his body. I love everything about him at every moment of the day but when he's sleeping and there is nothing planned for our day an di get to watch him sleep, he seems even better. Like I can see every single feature on his perfect face, and it makes it ten times better for me. Right now, with the rain falling down hard and the thunder booming every now and then, I feel like nothing could go without lives. He looks so cute, all snuggled up under the blankets, pulled up right under his chin. He's facing me, and probably thinks he's still lying on my arm but I've been up for a while. I woke up because of the rain and couldn't go back to sleep so I went down to my little make shift gym and worked out for an hour. When I got back upstairs to check on him, he was still asleep in his same spot. SO I took a shower. Again he was still in the same spot so I decided to get back in bed with him in just my boxers and he still hadn't woken up. Well I wanted more. I needed more. I wanted to hear his voice and see his wonderful smile. I reached up slowly and ran my fingers through his hair forcing his eyes to flutter open. He groaned hearing a loud boom and pulled the blanket it up all the way covering his head. I only smiled feeling my heart flutter. "Could you be any cuter?" Another small groan left his mouth and he pushed into me rolling into the blanket to make a small full Logan burrito.

"Is it raining?" I nodded pulling the blanket off his head and rolled over top of him hovering over him and kissing the back of his head. He stretched out, and mewed underneath me yawning. When he opened his eyes again he raised his head and pushed himself up onto his elbows. I sat down on his butt and pushed the blanket off his back exposing his bare back to me. I leaned down quick and started placing soft little pecks here and there. "Do we have any plans today?"

"Carlos is dragging Kendall to look at houses today. I think we should go with them. Convince them to get the first house that allows them to move in tomorrow." He raised his butt making me bounce a little and I smiled. "Sorry I want our house back. I want to be able to fuck you everywhere in here again."

"You're such a perv."

"And you're the cutest damn thing in the world." With surprising strength he managed to get me off him and was over top of me straddling my waist. I wasn't complaining. He set his palms on each of my pecks and yawned glancing out our window at the rain. I set my hand son his hips covered in his sweats, which were mine, and smiled. "You know…I behaved myself last night but you got too drunk to give me a treat so…" I raised an eyebrow and he smiled looking back down at me. "You just can't be that loud…we still have guests." He nodded leaning down to me and set a hand on my face kissing me softly. I shoved my hands into the back of his sweats and rubbed my hands over his bare butt. I loved when he slept commando.

I sat up holding him still, letting him kiss into my mouth still and started to push off his sweats. When he got the hint I wanted him naked he pushed back and fell onto his back in-between my legs. He continued pushing off his sweats while I got up on my knees and pushed off my boxers. He kicked off his sweats, cheeks already flushed seeing my erect cock. I shoved his legs up and open and got between them wetting tow of my fingers in my mouth. "James…I need to tell you something…" I put my fingers down by his hole and raised my eyebrows shoving them inside. He groaned and arched his back closing his eyes. He turned his head to the side giving em access to his creamy white neck. I bent down and kissed over it, opening him up for my dick. I don't have an ego or anything but I'm pretty big and no matter how many times we have sex, he never gets used to me. "I need to tell you…last night…" He was already panting like a dog while trying to tell me something but I was way too damn horny to hear anything other than him telling me he wanted me balls deep inside him.

"Loges…it can wait…" I took my fingers out and quickly spit in my other hand rubbing my dick. He looked up at me with full brown eyes, biting his bottom lip. He grabbed the blanket underneath him and prepared himself for my intrusion. And like usual, I didn't tell him I was going to enter him so hard or fast. I pushed inside him completely making him yell out and sit up on his elbows. His mouth went onto my shoulder and he bit down to stifle his yell. I gritted my own teeth hating how mean he got when we boned and squeezed my eyes shut. "You alright?" I stated to pull out slowly putting my hands outside his body by his ribs. He laid back down and nodded smiling.

"Yeah…don't hold back baby." I smirked and snapped back into him shaking my head.

"You're a cocky son of a bitch you know that?"

"Speaking of…" I looked down in time to see him grab a hold of himself and tug on his semi hard cock. I groaned in my throat and bit my bottom lip. "I love you my handsome man." I closed my eyes nodding swallowing hard.

We finished up after having a nice and slow love making session. I hit into him hard and he grinding back onto my dick with fiery passion. We kept eye contact locked and when we came, we came together and he again bit onto my shoulder to not be too loud. I pulled out of him and fell onto my back next to him breathing hard. I wiped my forehead and looked up at our white ceiling smiling to myself like an idiot. "You are so good…like I don't think I could ever want anyone else." I laughed and looked over at him grabbing his hand closest to me.

"So…what did you want to tell me about last night?" He turned to me quick and sat up shaking his head.

"Oh uhm nothing…I just want to thank you for looking out for me and going with me." I sat up and rubbed up his spine feeling every bone. I kissed onto his shoulder and shrugged.

"That's why I'm here handsome man." He nodded back to me and quickly got out of bed, whole body red from embarrassment. He is so modest about his body. Even with me, after us being together for years he isn't comfortable in front of me and I could never understand why.

While he showered I changed and went down stairs hearing talking. Kendall and Carlos were on the couch looking at one of their open laptops. Carlos had his legs on Kendall's and was hugging around one of his arms like a little child clinging to his mother. I walked in the kitchen and cheered on the inside seeing a fresh pot of coffee. I grabbed a mug and yawned pouring some in. "SO we have four houses to look at today. You and Loges want to come?" I nodded hearing grumping from Kendall and walked to the fridge grabbing the milk. "And the sooner we find a house the faster we can be out of here and won't have to listen to you and Logan bang on a rainy Sunday morning." I turned quick and saw Carlos smiling wide at me as he climbed to sit on Kendall's lap. Kendall was now leaning back on the couch with his hood on and rubbed his face. "I lied and told Kendall I woke up from the thunder but I heard Logan scream and then heard your bed squeak. You guys go hard."

"Carlos!" Kendall shot up and covered his mouth laughing softly. "Jesus Christ we need our own place." I leaned against the counter smiling holding my coffee.

"SO have you heard from your manager? DO I have juicy news for my show on Monday?" He laughed but nodded and I got all giddy. I loved having a professional athlete for my best friend.

"I have a meeting on Monday with the Kings. I told him I'm bringing you along and he thinks it will be great for my publicity, so I would like to get a house before then. Where the hell is Logan?"

"Don't be a jerk…I'm right here. But I can't find my phone." I watched Logan walk to the couch and start to check the cushions while Kendall and Carlos sat on it still. He groaned and pushed Carlos off Kendall's lap making him jump up and tackle Logan to the couch. Carlos jumped up quick and ran out to me, all smiles.

We turned the house upside down looking for Logan's phone but it wasn't coming up. After calling it over and over he gave up and said it must be at the office. He said he would get it on Monday morning but he looked uneasy. While Kendall took a quick shower and Carlos called a realtor open on Sunday I sat on the couch with Logan watching him. He looked like something serious was bothering him, and I knew it wasn't about his phone. Something maybe had happened and he hadn't told me and it was slowly eating away at him. There was nothing on the TV hanging on our wall so I knew he wasn't distracted by moving pictures but something was on his mind. And the longer I looked at him the more concerned I got. I heard Carlos and Kendall come down stairs and say they were ready but I suddenly didn't want to go. "Actually if you guys wouldn't mind I kind of don't want to go out today. But you guys can take my truck." I gracefully tossed my keys to Kendall who caught them just as gracefully and smile big wrapping around Carlos.

"And Logan?" We all turned down to him and he smiled standing up.

"Yeah I think I'll stay too." They both shrugged, said their goodbyes. Kendall cashed Carlos out of the house pinching his butt making him squeal with approval. I slowly sat myself back down hearing the front door close and pulled Logan with me. We locked eyes for only a second before he turned away.

"Okay…what's going on? Is everything alright?" He laughed nervously sitting back and pulling his legs up to his chest hugging around them.

"Yes…I'm just…there's a lot on my mind." I nodded and scooted into him putting an arm on the back of the couch behind him.

"Like?" He sighed out and picked at the denim on his knee of his loose fitting jeans. I frowned and leaned in putting the bottom of his ear lobe between my teeth. I tugged gently making him sigh and push me away.

"Like…my best friend has a heart condition, he's moving out to L.A., I don't know if I sent out the mass email about the system update happening on Friday, My boss creped me out last night, I don't know if Carlos has any idea about how hard it is to buy a house…my parents want to come into town to see us and…"

"Wait a minute." He stopped quick and swallowed hard staring at me with big brown chocolate eyes. "You're boss creped you out last night? What did he do? You barely saw him all night?" He sat up quick crossing his legs Indiana style and grabbed my hands.

"Don't get mad at me alright…I didn't do anything and I didn't want him to do anything. But when we got in his office I sat down at his desk and started to open up his e-mail when he came up behind me and set a hand on my shoulder. Then he ran a hand through my hair and told me he didn't like seeing me with you in my office because he got attached to me during the week I guess and he told me it was rule to not have partners in the office and he bent down and got really close to me and asked me if I understood and…"

"Logan!" He stopped quick and looked seconds away from bursting into tears. "Is this what you wanted to tell me this morning?" He nodded quickly bowing his head down and I sighed out feeling my temper rising. "Is that why he made you work for an hour during a party?" he nodded again and I reached up grabbing his face and made him look right up into my eyes. Tears were on the verge of coming out of his perfect eyes and it killed me.

"I wasn't going to say anything, especially to you because I didn't want you to hate me but I couldn't take it anymore James. He creped me out and I don't know if what he did was because he was drunk or what." I forced out a painful smile and shook my head rubbing under his eyes. "Are you mad?"

"Yes but not at you." I pushed myself up and walked towards the front door. Logan was right behind me tugging on my arm.

"What are you doing?" He got in front of me as I bent down and pulled on some shoes. "James…it's not a bgi deal."

"It is and all I'm going to do is have a chat with good old Louis."

"No you're not! Please James, it's not a problem!" I straightened up and stared down at him in disbelief. "This is why I didn't want to tell you! You over react to everything! And I don't want to lose my job because you put my boss in the hospital."

"I just want to have a talk with him Logan. Just talk." He frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. "And why was it so hard to tell me something like that? I'm your boyfriend right? I'm the one who takes care of you, and protects you."

"Yeah from muggers and assholes who call me fag. Not my boss!" He shot back at me with venom but it barely fazed me. "Beside! He had a point! We shouldn't have been doing that in my office at a party. It's unprofessional!"

"You're unbelievable Logan! I'm going to go talk to Louis and tell him to keep his God damn hands to himself! And make sure he doesn't try to pull some bullshit on you like he did his last assistant!" His face twisted to confusion and I grinned. "Oh Louie didn't tell you?! The last guy who worked under him left his boyfriend to be with Louis because Louis promised him the moon and back as long as he sucked his dick for him! He's going to offer you the world Logan and because he's good looking and has power, you're going to fall for it! He only hired you because you're cute with a good ass! You're too naïve Logan and he knows it!" His mouth parted slightly and I shook my head trying to calm myself down. It wasn't my favorite thing to yell in his face. "If this wasn't a big deal for you, you wouldn't have said anything. If it didn't creep you out, you wouldn't have told me."

"You're an asshole! I'm not naïve! I got that job because I was qualified! And if that's all you think I'm good for…a cute face and a nice ass then you are worse than him!" He stomped past me fists clenched down at his sides and rushed to the stairs. "I can't talk to you right now! And good luck trying to find him! It's Sunday and the office is closed!" The realization hit me hard and I deflated kicking my shoes off. He was half way up the stairs when he turned to me mouth hanging wide open. "How did you know about his last assistant?" I put my hand son my hips and walked to the bottom of the stairs.

"I ran into him at the café Kendall Carlos and I ate at on Monday. That asshole fired him when he didn't want to put out anymore and actually wanted to go somewhere in the company. That guy is now working at as a waiter. Do you think it's going to be different for you Logan?"

"You're wrong James. He's not a bad guy!"

"Says the guy who just told me he was creped out by him!" He crossed his arms over his chest again and looked down shaking his head. "Monday morning, I'm going to work with you and I will tell Louis his boundaries and if he has a problem with it, you're quitting."

"You don't own me James!" I only shrugged and turned walking to the living room and sting on the couch angrily. I heard his heavy footsteps all the way up the rest of the stairs and down the hall. When the bedroom door slammed hard, making our pug who had been sleeping on the couch jump up, I sat back and closed my eyes putting my head back. This wasn't what I was expecting, but I wasn't surprised. Ever since that waiter told em about Louis, I didn't like him. And last night when the douchebag told Logan to do some work, my hatred grew. But I put on a happy face for Logan and gave him the benefit of the doubt. I noticed the way he looked at Logan and watched him. It was like the guy was in love. And for some reason, Logan was buy all his bullshit and come Monday morning he would be putty in the guy's hands. Well…not if I had anything to do with it.


	6. Chapter 6: Matthew

It was the first night I slept in my bed, alone, in a long time. James and I had never gotten in a fight like this before. He's never been so mad he screamed at me and told me I was basically worthless. Okay he didn't say I was worthless, but he told me I was naive and got my job because of my looks. That hurt coming from him specially because he was the one guy who has supported me through everything. I am so mad at him I could kill him. The next time I see him I won't be able to stop myself from ringing his neck. I left for work early on Monday morning just to avoided him. I spent all of Sunday in my room with the door locked. I heard Carlos and Kendall come in and had to re has all my anger when he told them what happened and almost went down to hit him repeatedly, but stayed in bed sulking. Carlos and Kendall both came to the door and tried to get me to come out but I only yelled at them and told them to leave me alone. And then I fell asleep. I woke up got showered, shaved and dressed and made my way down stairs hoping James was still sleeping. He was. He was on the couch, sprawled out only in boxers. If it was any other day I would let his gorgeous body distract me, but seeing him in his perfect form, sleeping, only pissed me off more. SO I packed all my work stuff grabbed my keys and left the house slamming the door hard, hoping I woke him up, just to piss him off.

I grabbed a quick breakfast and lunch form the store before going to work and when I got to work my fears from Saturday flooded back into my head. Louis was here. I had to park right next to him. But maybe it wouldn't be as bad as I was expecting. Maybe he'd apologize. I knew it was a long shot, but I knew Louis wasn't a bad guy. He was just drunk and maybe he was upset because he doesn't have a boyfriend. Maybe it hurt to see two people in love. I should be more considerate of my boss's feeling's.

When I got up to the 18th floor I was grateful no one else was at the office yet. I saw Louis light on in his office with his door wide open and braced myself as I walked to his office ready to say sorry. I stopped in the door way and knocked quietly seeing him bent over his desk writing fiercely. He looked up quick and stood up even faster taking his reading glasses off his face. "Logan…I'm so glad you came here. I fell absolutely awful for how I acted on Saturday. You have no idea how sorry I am. Please forgive me." I walked in slowly and shook my head smiling.

"It's okay Mr. Louis. I'm not upset with you." He breathed out but walked to me holding a piece of paper.

"I have written up a report to give to HR. I don't' want this to go unnoticed. I used my authority and power to make you work on your day off and I acted inappropriately to you. I am so sorry." I reached for the paper and took it form him softly reading the first few lines. He explain everything he did, keeping out the information about me making out with my boyfriend in my office.

"I don't think this will be necessary Louis." I looked up smiling small and ripped the paper in half. "You're forgiven and I know you didn't do it because you're a jerk. I should not have done what I did with James here." He chuckled taking the torn pieces of paper form me and walked back to his desk.

"Logan I don't mind if you have your boyfriend here. As long as it doesn't distract you form your work. In fact I was hoping I could have the two of you over for dinner on Friday night." I smiled small and walked to his desk sitting down across form him setting my bag on my lap.

"Well at the rate I'm going I think it might just be me." I gave a pathetic smile making him frown and lean forward on his desk.

"Everything alright with you and James?" I looked down and played with the strap on my bag feeling my cheeks burning.

"We got in a fight yesterday about what happened on Saturday night. I made the idiotic mistake of telling him what happened between us and he turned into the biggest jealous green monster I had ever seen. And don't get me wrong, I think it's great eh wants to protect me but he kept saying he knew what kind of guy you are, and how the only reason I got the job was because of my looks, and he told em he ran into your last assistant who told me a tall tale about you." It was nauseating to hear the silence around us. We were staring at each other, and while he looked hurt, I was trying to figure out why in the hell I said all that.

"He met Matthew?" I only shrugged and he laughed sitting back in his seat. "Logan…Matthew is an immature, childish boy who got upset because he couldn't get what he wanted form me. I'm sure he told your boyfriend I used him for my own pleasures and forced him to do things just because I could, but it's not true. Matthew came on to me, I was lone and depressed and fell in love. Unfortunately for me, however, the love wasn't mutual. He was just trying to climb the ladder and get further in the business. When I called him out on it, he asked me to give him a promotion or he'd quite. SO I fired him. I'm not one to get fucked over." I sat back feeling guilt wash over me and swallowed hard. "It killed me to see Matthew go. I really loved him, but he was more concerned about his job. I guess…" He stopped and gave me a sad look. "I guess this is why I feel so bad about what happened on Saturday night. I'm not that kind of guy Logan. And I know you're in a relationship with a guy who really looks out for you. Like I told you in the interview, you will never be put in a situation that would make you unsafe, or uncomfortable." I nodded reassuringly and eh smiled standing up. "You know what…let me buy you breakfast. We got a long busy day ahead of us and we will need our fuel." I blushed looking down and laughed.

"No you don't have to do that."

"I insist Logan. Let em buy you the best cup of coffee south of Seattle and the best omelet north of Mexico." I looked up quick and stood up laughing.

"Okay…but breakfast is on me tomorrow." He laughed nodding letting me walk out before him.

By the time we got back from breakfast is was a little past nine and the office was busy and buzzing. Louis excused himself as soon as we got off the elevator to go to a meeting he was almost late for, and I made my way to my office quickly. I knew I was going to have a long list of things to do, emails to answer, and calls to make, and above all else I knew at one point during my day I was going to have to call James. I put my hand on the door and started to unlock it, but found it was already unlocked. I pushed it open and frowned seeing the light on. I turned to my desk, seeing no one and then turned to my couch. I stopped holding onto my door knob and smiled small. James was sitting on the couch with one leg up on his other knee with a bouquet of roses on the coffee table in front of him. He looked clean cut, wearing a suit and had his hair slicked up perfectly. He pushed himself up slowly and cleared his throat putting one hand into a pocket on his dress pants. "How was breakfast?" I frowned quick and shook my head turning to my desk. I placed my bag on it softly and turned my computer on not looking at him. "I'm not trying to be a prick. I'm here to apologize and grovel." I sat down raising my eyebrows and stared at him as he walked to me, holding the roses. "I acted like a jackass. I said things that hurt you and I can't ever take them back. You know how proud of you I am. You know I'm your biggest supporter and you should also know, I trust you." He walked around my desk setting the roses on it softly and pulled me out form my desk setting his hands on my arm rests. I sat back looking up at him with hurt eyes biting my bottom lip. "I love you, and I'm sorry." As I stared up into his eyes it hit me. It might just be better to accept his apology, and move on with our love rather than to make everything worse. I reached up gently and held onto the side of his face pulling him down. Our lips touched for a few blissful seconds before I pushed him away and stood up. I wrapped my arms around his neck and laid my head against his.

"I love you too." He hugged around me tight and squeezed me turning his head to kiss my ear. "I don't want to sleep alone again."

"You won't. I promise." I smiled closing my eyes and stayed still just holding onto him. "What are you doing for lunch?"

"Eating my lunch at my desk by myself." I opened my eyes and misled hoping he caught on.

"Well make room for one more. I'll come by at 12."

"Perfect. Can you bring me something to drink. I forgot." He only nodded humming yes and we pulled away. I held his face again kissing his lips softly, before pulling away and smiling. He laughed holding my face and kissing my forehead. "See you at lunch." He turned and nodded walking to my door. He glanced back at me smiling small and waved once before walking out leaving my door wide open. I slowly sat down watching him all the way to the elevator. I waited until he stepped in and the doors closed before I stood up and walked out of my office. I walked up to the office receptionist and smiled nicely at the young looking guy who looked fresh out of high school.

"Hello Mr. Mitchell. What can I help you with?"

"Has a phone been turned in?" He frowned and opened up the bottom drawer of his desk. "It's an iPhone 5 with a dark blue case." He pulled out a small box with lost and found written on top and opened the lid. The only phone in it was an old Blackberry. I frowned and he looked at me smiling small.

"Sorry Mr. Mitchell. But if you lost it here, it will show up. Everyone has their own phones, no one is going to steal it." I laughed and nodded thanking him quietly. I mentioned my lost phone to Louis as we sat in a little both at a small hole in the wall café and he told me to check my office, his office and the whole building if I needed to. But it wasn't coming up anywhere. I sat back down in my desk defeated and made a mental note to call Apple to try to locate it later today, maybe at lunch. With my missing phone getting pushed to the back of my head I opened my e-mail and clicked on the first one, getting into my work state. "Mr. Mitchell?" I was only on the second lien when I looked to my door to see Henry, the receptionist standing in my doorframe holding a piece of paper. "While you were out you missed a few calls. And also…" He walked me the paper and I took it from him smiling. "Louis called just now asking you to come down to meeting room A." I sighed standing up and nodded walking out after him. I thanked him as he sat down and I walked down the halls hoping I remember which room was meeting room A. When I saw the only closed door I assumed it was it and pushed it open. I stepped in quickly and shut the door glancing down the long table spotting Louis. There were only three other people sitting at the table made for 30 and all four of them turned to me.

"Logan…" He waved em over and I nervously walked down the table seeing one the men, in street clothes, a plain white shirt and jeans, staring at me, giving me an almost nasty look. "I need you to grab four cups of coffee and get my lawyer a new pen along with my date book." I nodded turning quick and headed back to the door.

"Good luck being Louis's bitch." I stopped quick and turned to face the man who was now smiling at me. "If your still here and didn't listen to your boyfriend, you deserve everything you're going to get."

"Matthew, remember to keep quiet unless you want your words used against you." Matthew turned away from me quick and stared at Louis who gave him a dirty look and then looked ot me. "Ignore him Logan. Please coffee, a new pen, and my date book." I smiled big at Louis making sure Matthew saw and walked back to the door.


	7. Chapter 7: Safe Secret

I knew the people around me, where getting irritated with me, and my camera. No one liked the flash or the clicking noise, but I don't think anyone knew how important this moment in time was. I don't think anyone knew that the guy sitting two tables away from them, or…right next to them was being signed to a great hockey team. No one knew that that same guy was an MVP, three years in a row for one of the greats teams south of Canada. Well, maybe they did know, they just weren't as excited as I was. And I was excited because that guy, was my best friend. And I felt like a proud mother watching her baby walk on the school bus for the first day of the first grade. "Smile!" I raised my camera, a fancy, expensive high tech one, with a huge lens one more time, making the two opposite me turn to me and groan out, loudly.

"James…no more. You're worse than the paparazzi." I grinned snapping the photo noticing how Carlos slipped a hand out of view, and not a second later, Kendall turned to him give a small, half smile. Perverts. Kendall turned back to me and leaned forward grabbing his latte. "So…did you get enough info over there Tom?" I sat back in my seat letting Carlos's confused look ask my question for me. Kendall sipped casually before laughing, setting his cup back down. "Tom Brokaw? I swear…the whole breakfast you were over their writing, or taking pictures. You barely had anything to eat."

"I'm waiting for my lunch with Logan." I immediately got a dirty look from Carlos who pick d up his napkin and wiped his hands off. "Don't look at me like that. I said I was sorry. He forgave me…"

"Yeah but you're only going over there to try to find dirt on Logan's boss. And just like with the New York thing, he's going to find out and murder you." I rolled my eyes picking up my glass of iced water. Kendall chuckled reaching for the little black book for our check while pulling out his wallet simultaneously. "James what do you think you're going to find out about him? He's just a rich, great looking guy who happens to have amazing taste in assistants." Kendall looked up and over at Carlos fast glaring. Carlos grabbed his Dr. Pepper ignoring Kendall and sucked from his straw still staring at me.

"Excuse me?" Carlos looked at him fast confused making Kendall toss his wallet and the check back on the table with a gold card. "You first say Louis is great looking and then finish it up by saying he has great taste in guys, a.k.a. Logan, in front of your boyfriend. I have feelings jerk." Carlos giggled, lifted Kendall's arm and sat back snuggling against him.

"Don't be a weirdo. You know Louis is good looking, you said it yourself, and I wasn't commenting on Logan's looks. Logan is doing a great job at work. He's been talking about his coworkers, talking about how everyone goes to him for questions on anything foreign. Oh and he keeps talking about some stock that they own that everyone is trying to buy into, and how Louise asked him advice on how many people to let in. Logan loves it there, James, and the moment you go in there to try to act tough, it will ruin Logan's experience, and he will hate you. He may not say it right away, but it will build up inside him for the rest of the life until one day he realizes how much pain he's gone through and leave you all on your own with 47 cats, living off of tomato soup." My mouth slowly parted open as I stared at him, in shock and a little bit of worry. He smield small and shrugged ignoring Kendall's lips attacking his neck. "Just a theory." He grabbed his phone form the table leaving me to seriously think in the silence and after a minute passed he looked back up at me and frowned. "Did Logan ever find his phone?" I closed my mouth and rolled my eyes standing up. Sometimes being around Carlos (mostly because I hated how much more Logan told him), would get me really irritated. Kendall and Logan rarely ever left Carlos alone together. It would end in words getting said and maybe even a physical fight. We just didn't really see eye to eye, on a lot of things.

"No he didn't. Why? Going to warn him his asshole boyfriend is going to try to do something stupid?" Kendall sighed standing up quick and grabbed my phone and camera off the table handing them to me.

"It's almost noon. Thanks for coming man." I nodded and smiled small taking my things from him and stepping around the chairs to get out form the table. "We have another house to look at tonight with our realtor. This will probably be the house so if we can I might buy it tonight. If we do, we'll stay there tonight and let you and Logan fix your dumbass fight form yesterday."

"I already fixed it Kendall."

"Sure you did…" I looked down to Carlos fast who wasn't looking at us but at his phone. Kendall sighed and patted my shoulder. I huffed out, thoroughly pissed off and walked past him not saying two words to Carlos. Way to ruin my day asshole.

I drove slowly through town trying my hardest to keep my anger down, and my head cool. I ripped my jacket and tie off and unbuttoned the top three buttons on my shirt. I hated how dressed up I had to be for a meeting for Kendall. It started out fine. I got to meet the head coach of the Kings and a handful of managers, lawyers, and even got to watch Kendall sign over to the Kings. It was an amazing experience and I took thousands of pictures and wrote down everything I could. I was regretting that now, because I barely ate my blueberry muffin. It was an awesome 2 hours that consisted of sports and talk about the progression of gays in sports, something both Kendall and I knew all to much about. It was still slow going, but the baby steps were really adding up. But enough was enough, about his day. It was now my turn to go to Logan, have lunch and maybe bang on his desk to really make up for our fight. He had 30 minutes. I could eat and fuck in 20.

After grabbing him a drink and myself lunch from a burger place, I got to his work and parked on the bottom level of the garage and made my way up to his office slowly. I knew my fries and burger were cold when I stepped out of the elevator and made my way to his wide open door. The office seemed fairly empty, with one, maybe two people eating at their desks, and Mr. Steven's office was closed up tight. Even the blinds were down. I frowned and started to think of a million and one things I could do to tyr to find anything. Anything, on Louis. Rich assholes always had dark, deep secrets. I stepped in slowly into his office seeing him with his back to me his phone pressed between his ear, and his shoulder, standing in front of filing cabinet. "No sir, the account wasn't processed until last Monday morning. Our records are showing, because of your late entrance, you have no claim on it." I softly set my food and our drinks on his desk, sitting in the two chair sin front of his desk. He turned, the wrong way, getting tangled in his phone cord, and groaned out very quietly. He turned the other way throwing a yellow folder on the top of his desk before sitting down clearly pissed off. We locked eyes, me giving a small sad smile. He chuckled and leaned forward resting his elbows on the edge of his desk. "I'm sorry sir, legally we cannot release any of your money because there is no money to release. You bought in too late sir." He used his free hand to pinch the bridge of his nose while he closed his eyes and shook his head. "Sir…sir if you could just look back at your report…excuse me?" I raised an eyebrow seeing him sit up a little straight mouth hanging open. "Well then go ahead and call my boss because he's just going to tell you the same thing! No you have a good day!" He slammed his phone back down on its place and jumped up. He walked around his desk bent down quick, kissing my cheek and walked to his door. "The nerve of some people! They hear I am an assistant and assume I just let people walk all over me!" His door shut kind of hard making me jump. "Let's sit on the couch." His door locked in place making a creepy pervert smile spread across my face. I stood up grabbing the food and our drinks and walked to the couch watching him close all his blinds. Tight. When he started to walk to me he stopped and turned quick going to his door. He pulled it open and stuck his head out, showing off his perfect ass for my viewing pleasure. "Hey Henry…can you hold all my calls, and take any calls for Lou." I rolled my eyes at the stupid guy's name and cleared my throat. "I'm taking my lunch." He got back in the room shutting and locking the door again, sighing out. He stopped, put his hands on his hips and smile sexily at me. There definitely was a twitch in my pants. "Hey you. I feel like I haven't seen you in days." I chuckled and patted the seat next to me on the black leather couch. He also laughed and walked to me, loosening his tie around his neck. He flopped onto the couch next to me automatically curling into my side, yawning. I wrapped my arm around his shoulder and kissed the top of his head, ignoring the product in his hair. "What did you get me?" He set a hand on my thigh and rubbed, slowly but roughly, towards my now rising dick.

"Well it's not down there, that's for sure. I got you a diet coke like always." His hand quickly cupped over my dick, making me throw my head back and moan out.

"Well then thank you. I'm stealing some fries…" There was a loss of contact quick. I sat up and watched him walk to the back of his couch to his little fridge and pull out a grocery bag of what looked like a banana, an apple, an already made sandwich, and when he sat back down next to me and opened up the bag, I also so a candy bar. He raised it up and shoved it to my chest. "I bought you a present." I took it from him softly and leaned in to steal a kiss but he turned away fast. I sighed out hard, and loud making sure he heard me and set the candy bar on the table going to my own bag of food.

"Tease…" His only response was a giggle. It took every bone in my body to not lunge towards him and hold him down while I fucked him silly.

We talked while eating, about how his day was going so far. I casually asked him about his phone, asking if he had tried to find it through the cloud, but he didn't have any lick there. It wasn't showing up, at all. Anywhere. I had my suspicious, all of them surrounding Louis, but kept them to myself, as he started in again about his day. Dealing with idiots who don't know how to count, or how to buy stock, as he put it. He kept throwing out words, big words, that I didn't know anything about, but was just glad we were talking to each other. I was also very distracted. It might sound weird, but I like to watch him eat. Granted, I would I liked watching him kill a dozen puppies. I was so fucking honry, for no reason as I started to understand. I'm not sure when it started, maybe when he walked to me on the couch, or maybe even before that. From this morning, when he forgave me and let me kiss him, I couldn't stop thinking about him. And more so than I usually do. And as he stood up, to throw away his garbage and mine, I noticed something missing on him. Something on his left hand.

"So,": He walked to the front of his desk and sat against it folding his hands in his lap. "We're all done eating now. I still have…" He raised his left hand and smirked glancing back to me. "12 minutes, technically. What could we do…to pass the time?" He raised an eyebrow slowly sticking his tongue out form his mouth and dragging it across his bottom lip, before letting it run over his top lip. Then to kill me even more, he bit his bottom lip, and his cheeks flushed red. I stood up from the couch, and in five long, quick strides, I was in front of him holding his hips and kissing his mouth with pure passion. His hands rested on my chest softly and he moaned into my lips. I wasn't slow, or sweet while I ripped his belt off. When I pushed his zipper down and popped off the button I shoved my hand in, under the boxers even and grabbed a hold of his solid 7 inches. We pulled away, both out of breath and while he dropped his hands down to my pants, I rested my forehead on his and looked down to see my hand sliding over his cock. "We are in my office. During hours…don't make me be too loud." I chuckled kissing his forehead and just as he got my pants undone I turned him quick, pushing him into his desk. He groaned out and shoved some papers, and pens away to put his hands palm down onto the desk. "I'm not as big as you James." I laughed pulling his pants and boxers briefs down to expose his perfect white, bubble butt.

"Was that a fat joke you bully?" He groaned bending down completely and put his hands on my hips looking up at me form his turned head.

"No…my hip bones are directly on the wood of this very expensive desk. I'll bruise if you're too rough." I gently rubbed up his spine, under his black button up shirt slowly pulling my sensitive dick out form my pants. After watching him get situated on the desk to where he could touch himself and be comfortable, I put both my hand son his ass and spread his cheeks a bit. "I have to admit…I'm worried your going to be rough on purpose." I grinned bending over, from behind him putting my lips by his ear while carefully aligning myself to his entrance.

"Now why would I do that?" He closed his eyes and pushed up, pressing his back right into my chest.

"Because whenever we fight, regardless of who is to blame, you take it out on my body. But in the best way possible." I smiled nipping at his ear lobe and pushed the tip in. His moan was soft, and low, but it made the point. He wanted more. I pushed in further making him lay back down on his desk, pushing back into me, so I was completely inside him. I quickly put my hands on the desk outside his head and glanced down his back. I wished I had taken his shirt off, but could do nothing about it now. I pulled my hips back, only leaving the tip in and breathed out hard.

"Do you tell Carlos things, you don't tell me?" His eyes opened quick and he pushed up resting on his elbows. The back of his head, touched my lips and I kissed around it softly, still only keeping the tip inside.

"Why is it that you and Carlos can't get along?" I put my head down, resting it on his shoulder and pushed back in, to pull back out a little faster. I started a nice tempo of my hips making his head roll forward and hang down. "James I tell Carlos things, that you don't want to hear. I talk to Carlos about things that I know would bore you."

"Like your job? Or how I treat you?"

"God damn-it why can't we just have a regular make up sex session?"

"Who are you to decide what I don't want to hear from you?" He stayed quite only gasping out every now and then form my continuing thrusts. "Everything you ever have to say, is important to me. I want to know every little detail about your day, and I want to know if the things that I'm doing upset you…fuck." I stood up straight grabbing ahold of his hips, sliding the dress shirt up a little exposing more skin, on his butt and his back. I dug my fingertips into his skin watching my dick slide in and out of him. When he laid himself back down and set one hand on my bare hip while his other hand grabbed his cock and started rubbing himself. He remained completely quiet, even kept his moans and groans, low, and deep down in his throat. I didn't mind. We weren't planning on talking, and I honestly shouldn't have brought anything up, but Carlos really got to me at breakfast. Was I really blind to how I had been treating my Logan?

It took us a little longer to reach climax, then usual. I think for me, it was a mix of my thoughts, and the fact that he wasn't making a lot of encouraging moans. He might have been waiting for me to release as well because when I came, deep inside him, he also groaned out and shuttered underneath me cussing under his breath. I stayed still for a minute hearing his out of control breathing. I rubbed circles onto the skin over his ribs fro a minute before pulling out of him and quickly puling my boxers and pants back up. As I zipped myself up he pushed off his desk and also pulled his clothes back on his body and turned to me slowly. I sat down in the chair closest to me and put my hands on my head locking them at the fingers. I watched him look me over nervously. "I'm sorry." I swallowed hard looking down to see his hand covered in his own seed. "I'm going to go clean myself up…I'll be right back." He bent down fast and with his free clean hand, he grabbed my chin, pulled me up with force, and kissed me hard. It wasn't a French, and there was no sign of a tongue dance. He just pushed his lips, hard into mine, and kissed me with everything he had. When he pulled away, he walked quick to his door and walked out not saying another word.

I'm not sure why, but I got up and walked out of his office, seconds after him. I saw him dart into a bathroom hoping no one saw him. As soon as the bathroom door closed I turned to the left and walked to Louis, office door. My hand gripped the knob and without having time to over think it anymore, I turned it, and pushed open. My mind and my soul was not ready to see what I was seeing. Just like I had been moment s ago, Louis was bent over his desk, vigorously fucking someone. I could see a skinny pale body of a guy, on his back, sprawled across Louis's desk, but I couldn't see his face. I heard a gasp leave my mouth, and I started to back out, but Louis saw me. I shut the door quick and turned walking back to Logan's office next door. I sat back down in my seat and breathed out running a hand through my sweaty hair. I cringed hearing the door open next door and clenched a fist down at my sides hoping Louis didn't walk in…"James, right?" I stood up fast and swallowed hard staring at his face noticing it a little red, with some sweat glistening on his forehead. "You're Logan's boyfriend, right?" I nodded forcing a smile. A tiny pathetic grin spread on my face making me want to dig a hole and dive in, head first. "Look…I don't want you to think…"

"I'm sorry, I barged in. I thought it was Logan's office. I was confused." I was pretty proud at how even my voice came out. He chuckled and started to tuck his shirt back into his pants.

"I just don't need this coming out. If anyone knew I was fucking my 19 year old receptionist I'd probably get a bad name. But you look like a guy I could trust. My secrets safe right?" He winked at me smiling and just as I was about to answer Logan walked in, cleaned up, his tie back around his neck, tight. He smiled big looking between the two of us and walked to me slipping his arm around my waist. "Logan! There you are. I was just coming in here to ask you how the call with Mr. Miller went?" I swallowed hard and looked to see Logan not smiling anymore.

"That man is beyond rude and said he was going to call you, to fire me because as he said, I was a punk. You're going to have to deal with him." Louis laughed and nodded putting his hand son his hips.

"No problem." We went quiet and Louis looked back to me smiling. "So, Logan have you discussed Friday night with James yet?" I turned to Logan fast, who blushed and scratched the back of his neck.

"Oh well no…we didn't talk about it yet. James, Louis has invited us to dinner on Friday." We locked eyes and for some reason he looked like he was going to cry. I smiled big and wrapped my arm around his shoulders pulling him into me.

"That sounds great Louis! We will definitely be there." Louis nodded and extended out his hand for me. I shook it, still smiling, for Logan's sake.

"Well I will get back to my lunch," He winked at me as he started backing up, making the hair on the back of my neck stand up. This guy was definitely a creep. "And see you on Friday! Make sure if Miller calls again, you put him directly through to me…" Logan nodded against my chest and as soon as Louis turned out of form the office he pushed off me got in front of me and stood on his tip toes grabbing my cheeks. He pulled me down to him, kissed me hard again before letting go and sighing out hard.

"I'm sorry…about not telling you stuff and telling Carlos…" I covered his mouth quick and snickered.

"Shh…don't fret that little, beautiful mind of yours. How about we talk tonight? All by ourselves. We have our house back." He licked my palm nodding and I bent down kissing his forehead. "I love you but I have to get my ass to work." He laughed while we separated and I walked to the coffee table grabbing my wallet and keys. "If you can, I'm putting up Kendall's story today. Check it out." I slipped my wallet in my back pocket and walked to him behind his desk. I kissed his temple as he sipped his drink and nodded. He looked up after swallowing and we kissed on the lips one last time. I stood up and walked to the door, telling him I love him over my shoulder, and smiling when I heard it back.

As soon as I was safely in the elevator I pulled out my cell phone and called Logan. I was more than surprised when it was picked up on the second ring. Except there was no friendly hello, like any normal person would answer a phone. There was a loud, moan. Like a…sex moan. And then there was a deep husky voice that was far too familiar. "Keep quiet baby…oh shit…" The call was ended fast but I got all the information I needed. I quickly dialed up Kendall and pressed the phone to my ear watching the orange numbers go down on the elevator.

"Hey thanks to you and Carlos arguing, I'm in the dog house." I smirked not caring and cleared my throat.

"I'll make it up to you…listen…I need to talk to you, and maybe convince you to help me with some things. How can I bribe you into doing this?"

"Well I need some new gear…and it really just depends on what you need."

"Well I'll explain when I see you. Can you meet me at that jewelry place on Sunset?"

"Jewelry? Are you buying me a pretty necklace?"

"No asshole…I'm buying a ring. Just say you'll meet me there in like…three hours? I have to do my pod cast."

"Yeah sure…see ya there." I hung up quick and sighed out in relief when I hit the first floor. As I walked quickly to my car, I couldn't help but be completely disgusted with Louis Stevens. He was having sex with a 19 year old receptionist. But the worst part in my head was wondering if I hadn't come to have lunch with Logan, would have it been Logan underneath Louis?


	8. Chapter 8: Perfect Situation

There is nothing worse than losing your cell phone. Oh wait…there is. Waiting in live for two hours at the Apple store to get a new one! This is the last thing I wanted to do after work. Actually, if I had my way I would just wait tell I found my own phone but I was bullied into changing my mind by my obnoxious boyfriend. I honestly didn't mind not having a phone, but he was convinced someone had taken it and as long as I kept it on, they would be able to use it for themselves and maybe get some of my personal information. SO I gave in and after work drove myself to the Apple store, talked with a guy who said it would be no problem to get a replacement because we had insurance. But right now, it's almost 7 at night, I'm tired and hungry from a long busy day and all I wanted was to get home and fall into a coma. But I guess it's a lot more complicated than just giving me a new phone with a new number. The next time I see James, I'm ringing his neck. "Okay Mr. Mitchell…" I put on my happy, fake smile and watched the guy behind the counter walk to his computer and type some stuff after setting a box of a black iPhone on the counter next to him. "Sorry about that…we are having a problem with our system today and every time we scanned your new phone it came up as already being used." I frowned pulling my wallet out and he chuckled. "Actually, every phone we did it to was coming up used. But we got it all taken care of. So sorry for the wait."

"Oh it's no problem." If he doesn't hurry up and just give me what I need I'm committing mass murder.

Of course as my luck would have it, as soon as I get my phone and get in my car, pulling it into charge so I could call James, he doesn't answer. I leave him a voicemail asking if he wanted me to pick something up for dinner, but there is still no answer. So knowing there was at least some left over dinner from a few nights ago, I drove home, hoping I could just eat, take a hot shower and go right to sleep. Is it bugging me James wouldn't call em back, and I felt even worse for our conversation at lunch. I am dick for not thinking he'd want to hear about my problems or my job and as soon as I got home, I was going to beg on my knees for his forgiveness. Hopefully eh was there, and hopefully our idiot best friends weren't there either.

I pulled up into the dive way smiling at James' struck but not feeling good about it. There were no lights on in the house, I could tell. I was dark out already, and it made the darkness of the house sick out even more. The porch light wasn't even on either. I almost called him again asking if he was home, and I even almost text Kendall but then I saw it. A light flickered on in from the living room making me smile and get out fo my car quick. With my arms full of my bag, my new phone, my keys and a box of files I had to go over and check for Louis, I made my way up to the front door. I slipped my hand onto the door knob and pushed it open slowly letting my smile fall off my face. I took one step into the house before I was stopped, every breath, and thought forced out of my body. I let the box and my bag slip out of my hands and off my shoulder without a care seeing the sight in front of me. It was something I wasn't expecting. And when I tried to step over the mess I just made I felt a small sob tickle out of my throat. I covered my mouth quick and closed my eyes hearing a small laugh. "Come on in baby…the wind's going to blow my candles out." I turned quick and shut the door wiping the tears away from under my eyes. When I turned back to him James was still on one knee wearing the same clothes form today holding a small white box in his left hand. In the box was a silver ring. "I heard your message…first of all I'm glad you canceled your old phone and got your new one and sorry I didn't answer. I got you your favorite." And he really did. Set up in front of him, laid out on a white and red checkered picnic blanket were two plates of food. If I had to assume, because he knew everything about me, the food was form our favorite Italian restaurant on Sunset. The penne was calling my name but for some reason I couldn't move from my spot. I was still standing in front of the closed front door, one arm hugging around my stomach the other covering my mouth. I was crying and I wasn't even going to try to hide it anymore. "I also got you something else." He carefully rose the box, as to try to hide his shaking hand but I saw it. I also saw, for the first time, how nervous he looked. But he also looked super excited. I couldn't blame him for either emotion. When he swallowed hard and glanced down wiping his free hand off on his pants. I couldn't help my chuckle as I stepped forward slowly dropping both hands to my sides.

"I see that." He looked up quick and smiled at my smile. I had to step over my bag and box, and when I got close enough I walked around the food set up, and slowly dropped to both my knees seeing his beautiful face flushed with red. It also looked like he was sweating and when I reached up, as quickly as I could to wipe he forehead, he chuckled bowing his head down and shook his head.

"I had this all planned out…I didn't realize how hard it would be to see you and not collapse from your cuteness." I chuckled sitting back on my feet letting more tears fall out of my eyes. "Do you remember the first time I kissed you?" I blushed instantly and bowed my head down wiping my right off onto my right shoulder. "We were in Minnesota still…it was Junior year I think? I came over to your house,, walking in the blistering snow and wind clutching onto my stupid math book and homework and as soon as I got inside, you, Logan Mitchell said we could wait to do homework because I needed to get warm. You let me go up in your room as you made us hot coca and some left over lasagna form the previous night." I slowly raised my head, not even remembering all the little details he was telling me. "As I sat up there and waited I started to browse on your lap top and stumbled upon your exclusive stash of gay porn." I squeezed my eyes shut laughing and wiped my under my eyes again blushing even harder. "I heard you coming up the stairs so I shut your lap top quick jumped on your bed and acted innocent." I raised my head again and opened my eyes seeing him staring at me, a sweet smile on his face. "I don't know what came over me…probably the fact that I found out this adorable cute, nerdy, quirky kid who I had a huge crush on was gay but…I kissed you, as we sat in your bed and made small talk. I don't think you saw it coming. I think I surprised you as much as I did myself. When I held onto the side of your face with one hand, still holding my fork in the other and I pushed our lips together…something hit me hard Logan. Right here." He touched his chest softly, over his heart, breaking my own heart with absolute joy. "I fell in love with you on December 13th in our junior year of high school, and every day since then, I have never stopped. I can't picture my life without you. Every time I imagine where I'll be in ten years, you're standing right beside me. Holding my hand telling me how cute I am when I wake up too early. Every song ever written, cant sum up how I feel about you Logan, and with every second that passes in my life, I'm thinking of you and only you. You are my idea of a perfect situation. Everything you do is right and everything you say is a work of art." Another pathetic sob left my mouth making em look down and cover it. "Even when you cry, whether it be tears of joy or sadness or those rare times when I make you so mad all you can do is cry…you are perfect. And when we stand next to each other, I feel whole and complete and because of you, and your perfection, I am the man I am today. Without you, Logan Mitchell, I am not me. And for the rest of my life, I want to be the man you've made me, and I know the only way I can be him, is if you look at me right now…" I looked up dropping my hands to my lap and clenched them hard. "And you say yes to the hardest question I've ever had to ask you." I was letting the Nile river pour out of my eyes, but if he didn't care, and if he didn't think I looked blotchy and puffy form the crying, I didn't. "Will you marry me?" His voice was a whisper and yet so full of love and happiness. He raised the little white box and the candle light was caught in the silver of the band. I swallowed hard daring to look at him, in the eyes and as soon as I did, I lunged forward, wrapping my arms around his neck, pulling my body up on his.

"Yes. A million times yes." He was fast to hug around me back and while I buried my crying face into the open skin showing on his neck, he pulled me up even further on his body, kissing the side of my head rubbing my back.

"Let me put it on you…" I turned my head in his body sitting on his now Indian crossed legs and raised my left hand shakily. He attached his lips to my temple as he took the ring out of the box and grabbed my left hand. When the band started to slip onto my finger I closed my eyes, crying still pushing into him harder. "You should call your parents…I had a conversation with your dad today…I'm sure they are waiting to hear form you about your night." I laughed pushing up, grabbed the sides of his face and pulled him in, kissing him hard. I pushed away only a few inches to look him in the eyes and talk.

"They can wait…the whole entire world can wait. I need you right now, tonight. Just you and I." He smirked leaning in pecking at my lips. I ran my fingers through his hair and tugged gently making him pull back from my mouth. I aggressively shoved him back so he was flat on his back giving me the perfect opportunity to crawl on top of him. "Did you have this planned before lunch?" I undid his belt watching him close the white box and blow some candles out that were closets to him. He finally laid his head back just as I had his zipper down and my hand in his boxers. He groaned closing his eyes and set his hands on my knees and I sat back on his legs.

"No…well kind of. When I got to your office I had the urgency to ask you to marry me. I hated our fight Loges and I don't want to take any chances of losing you." I nodded taking my hand out form his pants and started unbuttoning his shirt. "I love you." I looked up at his face and smiled biting my bottom lip.

"I love you too."

It was probably a mistake to stay up so late and sleep on the hard living room floor. When I woke up to kisses on my back and a soft voice telling em I had to get ready for work, my chest and back was sore. I don't think we ever got up during the night. I know we had sex, ate dinner, and we might have gotten up to get a drink and go to the bathroom but we came back to the living room and I sat between his legs doing the work that I so desperately needed to do. But I wasn't alone. He offered his help and after two and a half hours we were finished. That was when we had sex for the second, third fourth and fifth time. If I can remember correctly we didn't go to sleep until about 2 and now it was 5:30 and I needed to shower. Luckily I didn't have to even stand myself up. James threw me over his shoulder and walked us up stairs. He set me in the shower and started it for me, telling me he was going to get my suit ready and start my breakfast. If he did one more adorable thing like that I would be sure to bust.

It was hard to leave him and I almost pulled him into my car through my window as I started to back up, because, him being the jerk, walked me out to my car in nothing but a pair of sweat pants that hung dangerously low on his hips. I hated that I had a job now. I hated I had to be away from him for 8 hours but I was determined to make the time go by as fast as possible. I parked in my spot to close to Louis's and am demy way to the crowded elevator much like I do every day and waited patiently for my floor to arrive. When 18 came I was the only one to get out much like every morning. I smiled warmly at Henry who stood up and took my coat form me offering to hang it. I thanked him and walked to my office, unlocking it. When I stepped in, I turned the light on, walked to y desk and sighed out trying to block out the images from the previous day of us having sex on my desk. It was hard but as soon as I got my computer on, and I opened up my email I distracted myself. "Logan?" I turned quick smiling at Louis as he walked in holding a yellow folder. "I dealt with Mr. Miller this morning and got everything smoothed out. He asked if I was going to fire you and I told him when pigs flew so…" I laughed and stood up reaching for the file he was extending to me. I stupidly used my left hand and as soon as my fingers touched the folder his hand grabbed my wrist softly and raised it. "Are you engaged?" I blushed and laughed nodding. He let me go and smiled big walking around my desk pulling me in for a hug bear like hug. "Congratulations Logan! Did it happen last night?"

"Yeah he surprised me when I got home." He gave a nice squeeze before letting me go, but keeping a han don my shoulder. "There's no plans yet but…we're getting married!" I probably sounded too excited and like any good boss would do, eh would tell me to get back to work but that he was happy for me.

"Well what are you doing here?" I frowned quick and set the folder on my desk watching him shake his head and smile. "Logan you should not be working right now! You should be spending the day with your new fiancé. Go!"

"Louis that is nice of you but I have so much work to do and…"

"Logan it's an order. I pay you to be my assistant correct?" I smiled and nodded crossing my arms over my chest. "Well your job for the day, is to go home, spend the day with the man you love and relax. This is the last place you should be and working is the last thing you should be doing." I chuckled and raised my eyebrows to see if he was bluffing. He laughed, grabbed my phone and my keys handing me them and put my bag over my shoulder. As he started to lead me out, Henry was walking in with a piece of paper. "Henry I'm going to need you extra help today. Logan is taking a personal day today because he is engaged! Since last night!" Henry smiled big at me and put his hands behind his back hiding the piece of paper I knew I probably had to sign for something.

"Congratulations Mr. Mitchell!" I frowned and tried to stop Louis form walking me to the elevator but he was too strong.

"Seriously Logan…go home, get out of your suit and cuddle with James all day. That is an order kid, and your being paid to do it." I laughed stepping in the open elevator. I turned taking my coat form Henry who was still smiling. "I'll see you tomorrow and please pass on to James that I am happy for you guys." I nodded waving at both of them and as soon as the elevator doors closed, I stepped back pulling my phone out, dialing James. I really wanted to shove it in his face that he was completely wrong about Louis but kept it to myself. I was getting my first free, paid day off and if that wasn't proof enough by itself, that Louis was a good guy, I didn't know what else was.


	9. Chapter 9: Sassy Logan

I couldn't stop staring at the folder underneath me sitting perfectly on the table. I blindly reached out and grabbed my coffee cup still staring at the folder. "Just open it you pussy…I promise you're not going to see Louis banging Logan on the copy machine." I looked up fast and flipped Kendall off while drinking the rest of my coffee. "Seriously…there is nothing in there dude. He's got a squeaky clean record of being an upstanding member of society. The only thing on his file was the problem a few weeks back about that guy Matthew." I raised my eyebrows and he nodded grabbing his still full cup of coffee. "Yeah I guess Matthew lost his damn mind. He came into the office broke a 2000 dollar computer and monitor. He set the curtains on fire, he smashed every piece of furniture in the office while cussing at Louis and calling him every name in the book. I guess he also threatened Louis by saying he was going to blow the building up. Cops were called and Matthew was sent to jail for like a week, and now I guess he's working at that café." I sighed out slowly opening the folder hating that the first thing I saw was Louis's face. "Honestly…the guy has done a lot of good for the world. He gives a huge chunk of his money, after taking care of himself and his family, to charity. The biggest thing that stuck out for me is he's been at the front lines trying to legalize gay marriage. He's a huge advocate for equal rights."

"I don't give a shit if he gave his kidney to a dying 4 year old girl." Kendall stopped mid drink of his coffee and I closed the folder sliding it over to Kendall. "Okay…so great. He's a fucking saint. I know he took Logan's phone and I know all he's trying to do is get in Logan's pants."

"Hey genius…you don't have proof. And the more time you spend thinking about this, the more likely you will go crazy!" I sat back letting my hands drop into my lap and gritted my teeth. "And you know I will do anything for you and Logan but this…" He raised the yellow folder and glare at me, not happy at all. "This sneaking around bullshit has to stop! Carlos probably thinks I'm fucking cheating because I left last night to get this form my friend in the LAPD. And I can't tell him my idiot best friend is suspicious of his boyfriends boss because who is the first person Carlos will go to?" I looked down at my naked torso and wondered how Logan would react to finding out what I had Kendall do. Run a background check on his boss. But then again, as long as Logan wasn't forced to do something from this douche bag, I didn't care what Logan found out. "And then I had to lie to Carlos again this morning about where I was going, because if I told him I was with you, he'd want to come along and…" He stopped short and slowly rose himself up in his chair. I opened my mouth to speak but then I also heard it. A car was shut off in the driveway followed by a door being shut. "Are you expecting someone?" I slowly stood up shaking my head just as the front door opened.

"Baby?!" I frowned and walked out quickly tot eh front door to see Logan hanging his coat up and setting his bag on the floor. When he turned to us he smiled big and put his hand son his hips. "Hi Kendall…"

"What are you doing home?" I walked into him loosening his tie while he smiled bright and set his hand son my bare waist.

"Well Louis saw my ring, I told him were engaged and he gave me the day off. With pay." I nodded slowly seeing Kendall walk up next to us, a smug look on his face He grabbed Logan's left hand a raised it chuckling.

"Definitely looks better on your finger then in that store." Logan pulled his hand away from Kendall and glared at me in the sexiest way possible.

"You went ring shopping with Kendall?" I nodded yanking his tie off his neck. He pushed me away gently but laced our hands together pulling me back out to the dining room table. I panicked a little seeing the folder, but Logan didn't stop at the table. He pulled me all the way out to the living room and pushed me on the couch kicking off his shoes and climbing on top of me. I laughed and wrapped an arm around him while my other hand started to unbutton his shirt. "If I were you, I'd go Kendall. It's about to get really naked in here." I laughed turning my head to see Kendall looking a little panicked, with his phone pressed to his ear.

"Babe?" Logan also turned and we both watched Kendall's face go form worried to pissed. "Carlos? Baby…calm down…what happened?" Logan jumped off my lap quick and hurried to his best friend's side. I also followed seeing Kendall looking more and more angry and even a little sad. "No honey…what do you mean? Who was it?...well how did they get in?" He paused raising his eyebrows before turning to us and looking like Carlos just told him horrible news. "What did they do to you?" Now I started to freak out and moved forward setting a hand on Kendall's shoulder. "Okay…baby I'm on my way. Don't leave and call the cops okay. Okay…I love you. I will be there as fast as I can." Kendall dropped his phone from his ear, turned and headed to the door fast. Logan cashed after him getting in front of him and stopping him as I slipped on a sweater and grabbed Logan's shoes.

"Kendall…what's wrong? What happened?" As I slipped on some sneakers I saw Kendall run a hand through his hair and shake his head.

"Someone broke into our house." I tied my shoes half hazardly staring at Logan and Kendall. I stood up, grabbed my phone, wallet and keys and walked to them handing Logan his shoes. "Carlos said he was in the shower…he heard glass breaking down stairs…and he walked down with just a towel around his waist and he was hit." I swallowed hard gently pushing both of them out. Kendall had his keys out and ready, but I don't think he's in any condition to drive. I took them form him still pushing both of them out noticing Logan looking pretty scared. "And he wasn't just hit once. He said there were three guys and one of them had a bat."

"Oh my God…" I set my hand on Logan's neck and after locking up our house I walked both of them to Kendall's rented four door sports car. I set both of them in the backseat because Kendall was slowly coming undone and Logan was the only one who has ever seen him like this. Well, Carlos too but he wasn't here right now.

I sped through town not caring if I got pulled over. Kendall barely got out his new house address and by the time I had pulled up the street Logan had managed to get him calmed down. I was expecting a parade of cop cars outside their new, fancy, huge million dollar house, but there was no car even in the driveway. I parked on the street and barely made it out of the car before Kendall was running up to the front door, Logan right behind. I locked up Kendall's car and walked up slowly hearing Kendall call out for Carlos, and Carlos answer he was in the bathroom. I didn't want to be here, and not because I hate Carlos and don't care. Carlos and I have an odd relationship. We can get really pissed at each other and scream in each other's faces. But…he was like a little brother to me. I don't know if I wanted to see him like this, especially knowing I couldn't do anything to protect him or make him feel better. And just as I walked in through the huge doorway, I saw something out of the corner of my eye out on the front porch. I backed out slowly and turned my body to the right. The glass form the front window was broken, and I saw the glass, but something else shinny caught my eye. I walked slowly to the broken glass and kneeled down next to it reaching out for a silver bracelet. It wasn't any normal kind of silver bracelet. It was one of those ID badges for people who have an illness. This one had a phone number, diabetic and a name. John Steele. I frowned and glanced around for any other kind of clue but heard footsteps and my name being called by Logan. I stood up quick and shoved the bracelet in my sweat pant pocket and turned just as he walked out. He sighed out softly and walked towards me looking at the broken glass on the ground. "Carlos didn't call the cops because the guys who broke in, told him, if he did, they would come back an kill him. He's a mess right now and I told Kendall we'd stay with them as long as they needed. Kendall wants to talk to you." I nodded softly and followed him into the huge house. There wasn't much inside yet. They had only been here for two nights now. There was a make shift bed of blankets and pillows along with a cheap lamp next to it. As Logan led me through the house, down a long hallway I heard soft talking and someone crying. I tensed up not knowing if I really wanted to see Carlos like this, but had no choice. Logan turned to the left fast and I followed, stupidly. I stopped however in the doorway and dropped my mouth open slowly. Carlos was sitting on the counter of the bathroom in nothing but what looked like Kendall's sweats. Kendall was standing in front of him, between his legs and had a wet wash cloth in his hands. He was gently patting at Carlos's face. Carlos had his eyes closed, with tears coming out. He was bleeding form his nose, his right eye and his lip. "Kendall…" Kendall turned his head quick and we locked eyes. Carlos made a little cry and fell forward into Kendall turning his head away from me.

"James…I…do you remember that thing we were talking about yesterday and this morning?" I closed my mouth and scrunched my eyebrows ignoring the confusing look from Logan. I nodded, but I wasn't quite sure if he meant about Louis. "This…" He motioned to his shaking and sobbing boyfriend while running a hand through his messy hair. "This is because of that."

"How do you know?"

"What are you guys talking about?" I set a hand on Logan's hips and pushed him back stepping closer to Kendall and Carlos. All Kendall had to do was point to the mirror behind Carlos and I knew what he was talking about. Written in something red…I hated to think it was Carlos's blood was "_I know. L.S_." I made a move to reach out and touch it, for whatever God awful reason but I was stopped. Logan yanked my head down and stood in front of me leaning forward. He was inches from the mirror for only a second before he pulled away and looked back at me. "It's his blood…what does that mean? What have you guys been talking about?"

"Nothing…nothing…just…"

"Kendall don't tell me knighting! Not when Carlos is hurt! Who did this!" The whole bathroom went quiet except for Carlos's cries. I was expecting Kendall to come out and rat me out then and there. I was waiting for him to just say I had lied to Logan about my job offer, about my suspicion of Louis and then me being paranoid enough to run a background check but he did none of it. He didn't say anything about it.

"Logan…can you please take Carlos upstairs and finish cleaning him up. I'm going to take care of this." Carlos pushed of Kendall's body fast and let his bottom lip quiver. He reached out touching Kendall who smiled and leaned in kissing his forehead. "I'll be just down here. I'm going to take care of this." Kendall had to use little to no effort to slide Carlos off the counter top. When he was on his two feet he hissed out and held around his sides. Logan pulled him in quick, never taking his eyes off Kendall. Kendall simply stared back down at him. I set a hand on the small of Logan's back getting his attention, but his fiery gaze turned to me. He shoved my hand off him and pushed me out of the way. Before he could lead Carlos out, I gently grabbed his arm and squeezed gently. Carlos looked up at me, crying still margin my walls cave in and reach out for him. I pulled him in, softly and let him hold around my body as he cried on my chest. I ignored the mean glares form Kendall to Logan, and Logan to Kendall and closed my eyes holding around my shaking little brother.

"We're gonna take care of it Carlos." He pushed away from me nodding and glance dup at me. I smiled small and went to wipe away under his eyes. He laughed quietly and with my hand on his face, he grabbed it and bowed his head down.

"Don't…don't let Kendall…" His voice was really quiet. I could barely hear him. I moved in and looked over his shoulder seeing Kendall looking at Carlos, with only sadness. "Don't let Kendall get hurt, or in trouble." I chuckled patted his back gently and kissed the top fo his head. Logan sighed and moved forward taking Carlos out of my arms, still glaring at me

"Maybe you guys could do something useful and get some food and some Advil for him." I rolled my eyes at Logan who held Carlos gently as they walked out of the huge bathroom. "We'll be upstairs." They disappeared, Carlos telling Logan to take it easy on us. As soon as I heard them all the way up the stairs, I turned to see Kendall looking at the mirror. I crossed my arms over my chest and walked towards the edge of the sink clearing my throat.

"What does he know?" Kendall shook his head, his jaw twitching.

"I don't' know. Maybe that your suspicious of him?"

"Then why would he come after you and Carlos?" He turned to me slowly and I turned sitting on the counter. "Carlos said there was three guys…probably because he knew not only Carlos would fight, but you would put up a hell of a fight. You're a hockey player. He probably knows that. So he sent three guys to fuck you guys up."

"But why? I know were all friends but why would he be threatened by me and Carlos?" I dropped my hands to my sides and shrugged.

"Maybe he found out about you going to your friend in LAPD." His mouth slowly fell open as he also sat on the counter next to me. We sat quietly for a minute thinking, probably of the same thing. I heard a floorboard creak and cleared my throat just as Logan walked in looking pissed. He started between the two of us before walking up to us, shoving us away by our shoulders and grabbing the wash cloth Kendall had just been using to clean Carlos's face.

"If you two wouldn't mind…" Logan stopped and bowed his head down swallowing hard. "He's hungry…you know Carlos. And he also wants to watch movies the rest of the day so…"

"DO you mind staying here with him?" I turned to Kendall fast who stood up and put a hand on Logan's shoulder. "I know you won't like hearing this, but James and I can take care of this, and were going to. Right now. We'll get him some food and some other stuff for you guys as well but were going to take care of this, alright?" Logan pushed Kendall's hand off his shoulder, stood on his tippy toes leaned into me, and kissed my lips softly. He turned and walked out of the bathroom, Kendall and I behind him. I watched him walk back up the stairs rubbing the back of his neck.

"Don't get arrested…"


	10. Chapter 10: Another New Beginning

"Thanks for staying with me…I know I'm a pain in the ass." I smirked setting my hand on his head and put my head back, resting it on the wall behind me. I closed my eyes and sighed out crossing one leg over the other, making his head move around a little.

"Carlos your only a pain in the ass when you whine about something that isn't important. You were beat up buddy…you have every right to make me your personal slave." He only chuckled snuggling deeper into my body. My body screamed at me and made me groan quietly, but I knew the only reason I was sore was because I laid half on James's hard body, and half on the hard floor. "When are you guys gonna get a bed? Or….a TV…or anything?" There was a soft sigh underneath me making me open my eyes and look down at him. His cut at the corner of his eye was bleeding again, but I was already too comfortable and any ne movement would probably make my back break. "What…is everything going okay? Because I will literally kill Kendall if I need to." Carlos pushed up fast, taking his head off my lap and sitting up straight, sitting right beside me, pulling his legs up to his chest. "Los…"

"We haven't really been…physical." I frowned and stayed quiet until he turned to me. "Look…Ever since we found out about his heart…things have been awkward for obvious reasons. I mean…I saw him the first day he fell to the ground unconscious because of the condition and it scared the shit out of me. And then it went away but only because he hid it from me and tried to cover it up until he was into deep and thought he was going to die…so ya know out of pity he told me but…" He put his head in both his hands and shook it softly. "We haven't not been having sex because we don't want to…I'm just afraid once we really get into it…he's gonna have a heart attack or something and croak while he's inside me." I couldn't help all the laughter that spilled out of my mouth. It pissed him off. He pushed me and called me an asshole and a jerk and got up, stomping away. I hurried quick, containing my laughter walked into the kitchen with him. He pulled the fridge open and grabbed a can of soda. Before he closed the door, I also reached in and grabbed myself one. "Listen jackass…just because I don't have a perfect love life with a really good looking guy, doesn't mean you have to shove it in my face."

"Okay first of all, I'm telling Kendall you think James is better looking…" He glared back at me as he jumped up on the counter opening his soda. "Second of all we do not have a perfect love life. There are sometimes when I imagine grabbing around his neck and shaking him until he turns blue." He raised his eyebrows setting the can on the counter top next to him. I smirked and walked around their huge kitchen looking at everything shinny and fancy. "Third…I find it completely ridiculous that you reason you won't make love to your boyfriend…"

"Whoa back it up for a minute…we don't make love. No…Kendall pounds the living hell out of me." I rolled my eyes groaning at the nasty image forming in my head and waved him off.

"My point is, while you sit around and worry about a condition he has that is taken care of as long as he takes his medication…you could be loving him, and cherishing every single day he is given." I stopped walking leaning against the sink and looked at him smiling small. "Kendall did the things he did…like lying to you, hiding things form you, only because he knows how worried you get. Do you know what he would do if he found out about you stressing about having sex with him? Trust me buddy…I know the kid, and since you guys have gotten into town, I've seen how he is around you. He's a walking horn dog. You need to take care of that hot mess before he explodes all over the place." He sighed out hard and looked down swinging his legs, like a little kid does. Actually he looked exactly like a little kid. Because of their height difference, like with em and James, Kendall's clothes always looked two sizes too big on Carlos. The black hoodie and the grey sweat pants Carlo was wearing were baggy on him and made him look cute. Not my type, cause he's so short, but he's defiantly a really cute guy. I don't know how Kendall controls himself sometimes, to be honest.

"Yeah…that's something else I wanted to talk to you about. I think Kendall has been taking care of himself since we got into town, He's been acting weird…so weird lately, and I can only assume he's cheating and last night my suspicion was proved right because he left at like 5 yesterday to go do something in secrecy and wouldn't tell me who he was with, where we was going…"

"Wait…" He looked up and I swallowed hard clenching my left hand. "They didn't tell you?" He frowned sitting back and I slowly made my way over to him while raising my left hand. "James proposed to me last night." I set my left hand in front of him and smiled small. His mouth dropped open, he grabbed my hand pulling it forward. After a minute he dropped my hand crossed his arms over his chest and pouted.

"Why am I always the last to know big things like this?" I laughed leaning into him and hugged around his torso laying my head on his shoulder.

"Because you don't know how to keep a secret. You're a blabber mouth buddy." He softly tickled my sides making me dig into him and laugh, closing my eyes. There was a soft, nice kiss to my temple before he hugged around me softly.

"Congratulations Logan. I'm so happy for you…I always knew you and James would end up together, forever." I pushed away fast, grabbed his face and shook my head.

"And you and Kendall will too. You just need to talk to him. Share your fears, and your secrets. You can't expect him to be a mind reader Carlos. He won't know he's doing something wrong, unless you tell him. How do you think I have James trained so well?" He laughed looking down and played with his hand sin his lap. "The only way a relationship can work, is if you communicate. Otherwise it's just sex, and cooking for each other." He laughed again rubbing his nose and nodding. He looked up and opened his mouth but was stopped, when my phone started ringing in my front pocket of my work pants, I haven't been able to take off yet. I grabbed it quick, looked at the number, surprised to see Louis's direct lien form work and wondered how he got my number already. I hadn't even given it to my mom yet. I leaned against the counter next to Carlos and set my arm on his leg answering the phone. "Hello?"

"Logan, it's Louis." I smirked and looked down.

"Hi Mr. Stevens. Is everything alright?"

"Oh yeah of course…well not entirely." I stood up a little straighter and swallowed hard, knowing I was about to get called into work, on my first paid day off. "I had to fire Henry." My mouth parted slightly in shock but he continued not giving me a chance to say anything. "I caught him stealing. Money, form my wallet, and my safe in my office. I also found your old phone in his bag. I guess he's been stealing form us since the first day. I let him go, and he took it easily so hopefully we won't have any other problems with him, but now we are faced with a bigger problem. We need a receptionist at the front. I can't have you dealing with calls for the whole office, while doing things for me, so tomorrow when we get into work, I'm going to need you to put up an ad." For some reason, I looked to Carlos at that. I didn't know the whole situation with Carlos and Kendall, but I knew Carlos didn't work, mostly because Kendall likes being the provider and showering him with everything he wants. But I knew Carlos loves dealing with people, and loves to organize things, which would be exactly what he would do. Technically he would be like my assistant, as well as Louis's and the whole office.

"Actually…Louis, I think I already have one for you." Carlos stared at me weird, while I smiled big at him. "I can vouch for him, but I don't want you to give him the job because he's my best friend. He's a hard worker, has a degree in English from the University of Minnesota, has great people skills, and knows any and everything about computers." It went quiet on the other end, except for a door being closed and a jingle of keys.

"Is he the one dating the hockey player? Because at the party on Saturday, people in the office fell in love with him and if he's willing, I'll need him to fill out an application, and I'll need to run a background check, and..." He paused and I smiled even bigger at Carlos, knowing those two things would not be any problem at all. "If he could start tomorrow, so we could train him, Carlos is hired." I stood up straight and gently slapped Carlos's thigh nodding. "Bring him in 45 minutes early tomorrow so the two of us can talk and we can get him acquainted with everything. See you tomorrow Logan…I am also taking a personal day so if you for some reason get anything from the office, let me know."

"Thanks Louis." I hung up quick putting my phone by Carlos's leg and squealed out loud. "I just got you a job Carlos!" His mouth dropped open fast but he was smiling. "You'd literally be working right next to me, it's great benefits, we could car pool together…oh my God we could go to lunch together and bitch about all the people we hate at the office! Please tell me you'll take it!"

"Sure! I don't know what the job is, but I trust you! Yes we get to work together!" I wasn't expecting him to be so excited. I knew he would love the idea of us working together, but I didn't know it would make him leap into my arms and hug me tight. I wasn't expecting him to be so heavy either, which made both of us fall to the floor in a tangled mess laughing at how ridiculous we were being. I guess in both of our yelling fits of excitement, we didn't hear the front door or the hurried footsteps come into the kitchen. When I pushed Carlos off me and rolled onto my back I saw in the corner of my eye both James and Kendall looking down at us, looking confused, holding a lot of grocery bags. "Baby!" Carlos jumped up, and leaped into Kendall's arms, but Kendall is strong than me, and probably would die if Carlos dropped like I just let him. "I got a job!" I smiled pushing myself up and looked at James as he walked in laughing setting the bags down. I walked to him wrapping my arms around his back and kissed his chin.

"Did you have something to do with this?" I nodded biting along his chin and heard Carlos tell Kendall, who managed to put the bag son the counter, while holding Carlos up still, about how he would get to work with me. As soon as Louis's name came out of Carlos's mouth Kendall looked over at us, looking eyes with James. I glared between them, hoping neither of them said anything stupid to upset Carlos but Kendall beat me to the punch.

"Wait…you're going to be working with Louis?" Carlos nodded slowly, running his fingers through Kendall's hair, but Kendall gently set Carlos down. "Like…doing what?" Carlos started to say something but stopped and turned to me. I smiled and leaned into James lying my head on his chest.

"You're the receptionist Los…apparently Henry, the old one, that younger looking kid has been stealing since he started working there. He's the one who had my phone. Louis found it on him. Anyway, he called me to tell me about it and I told him about Carlos, who is well over qualified to work with us and Louis gave him the job. He starts tomorrow. Isn't that exciting?" I looked pleadingly at Kendall who looked form me, to James and then down to Carlos who was literally bouncing on his toes.

"I mean…I am sure you will do great but I mean…isn't that a little more advanced for you? I mean what they do? With the numbers and the different countries?" I turned away quick and looked up at James who was shaking his head clenching his teeth together. We both knew that was absolutely not the right thing to say. Especially to Carlos.

"What…you don't think I'm smart enough to work with Logan?" Kendall quickly realized what he said and started to back track. He even reached out and tried to pull Carlos into him, but Carlos shoved him off and walked to get out of the kitchen. "You're such an asshole Kendall Knight! You are so inconsiderate!" Carlos walked out of the kitchen completely and none of us said anything until we heard a door slam. James pulled me in roughly, squeezing onto my ass hard.

"Smooth move douche bag. Real nice. Tell me…have you written a book on how to offend your boyfriend in less than one minute?" Kendall flipped him off and went onto emptying the grocery bags.

"Yeah well from what I've heard…working for Louis is the last thing I want for Carlos. I don't want him getting fucked on his desk." I pushed James away fast and pointed a finger at him.

"Stop feeding horrible lies into his head! Both of you listen to me. Carlos will do great there, and if you don't trust both Carlos and I not to fall for some corny line, then that son you. Now if you wouldn't mind, again I'm going to comfort my best friend because you are…you are…" I stopped and threw my hand sup shoving out past both Kendall and James. I walked out, but when I heard Kendall's angry fast voice, I stopped to snoop.

"What do you think they'd do if we told them who sent out those guys to hurt me and Carlos? Huh? DO you think they'd' work for the guy if they found out he's fucking obsessed with Logan and had some guys beat the shit out of his best friend? If you don't tell Logan what you found out about Louis than I will just to make sure my boyfriend doesn't get hurt by this fucking wack job."


	11. Chapter 11: Brusies and Cuts

"You're awfully quiet tonight." I raised my eyes form my computer screen and watched Logan walk into the bedroom unbuttoning his shirt. He walked to our closet, yawning and rolling his head back and forth. "When I was given the day off, I didn't think I would be doing more work than I usually do. I'm exhausted." I remained quiet keeping my laptop on my lap staring at his back as it came into view. He glanced back at me, over his shoulder before pulling the shirt off his arms and tossing it to the laundry basket in the middle of the closet. "So this is what it's like talking to a wall." I looked back down at my computer staring at the pictures in front of me, feeling my stomach twist.

"Doesn't it seem odd that your boss is giving a job to a guy he doesn't even know, based solely on your word?" He laughed pushing his pants and boxers off, bending slightly. I stared out of the corner of my eye, just at his ass, but ignored my horniness.

"I know why it would seem weird to you. I mean. You don't trust me, so why should anyone else right?" I turned my laptop setting it on his side of the bed facing him clearing my throat. He opened up the dresser in the closet, my dresser and grabbed a pair of my sweats. He pulled them on, turning to me and frowning. "What is wrong with you? What do you have against Louis?" I crossed my arms over my chest and raised my eyebrows nodding to the computer. He sighed running his hands through his messy brown hair and walked towards me. He crawled onto the bed staring at me before looking down at the screen. He stopped suddenly sitting back on his legs and pulled the laptop up on his lap. "Where did you get these?"

"One of Kendall's buddies works for the LAPD. This morning, Kendall went to go see him, for me, to get a background check on Louis." Logan's head lifted fast and he burned holes into my head. "Nothing really came up…he's a good guy, clean record…seemingly harmless. But…" He looked back down and I heard clicking. He was probably looking through the rest of the pictures. Of him. At work or home, stopped at a stop light, laughing and walking around the mall with me Kendall…Carlos. "When we went out today, to find out about what happened to Carlos, we went to him again. This cop, Jimmy, said it is best Carlos didn't call the cops because these guys will come back to hurt him and maybe even kill him next time. And he said the best we could do, is always have someone with Carlos. SO we left, knowing the cops were on our side, but Kendall just sent me an email, from Jimmy, showing us this. It seems your boss has a little crush on you Logan, that has somehow spiraled into a complete fucking obsession." He closed the laptop quick and set it to the side looking only at me. "He also said, it's not really a coincidence that your best friend was almost beaten to a pulp with a message on his mirror with the initials L.S. on it." He quickly started to crawl closer to me until he was straddling my lap and holding the sides of my face with his hands.

"James…baby please. You have no idea how ridiculous you sound. My boss didn't come and hurt Carlos, just like he is not obsessed with me, and taking candid pictures. I mean…how do you even know it was him taking the pictures. How did this guy Jimmy even get them?"

"He hacked into Louis's computer at his work to try to see if he had any record of hiring guys to beat up an innocent guy." Logan raised his eyebrows and dropped his hands from my face. "He couldn't find anything on hiring anyone but he found a folder on his computer marked Logan. So he opened it up and found that." I pointed to my computer gently making him glance back to it and shake his head closing his eyes.

"You're over thinking things James. Maybe he was just following me to make sure I'm not a pshyco like his last assistant. And maybe he just wants to look after me. There's nothing wrong with what he did, taking those pictures. And to be completely Frank I'm a little pissed off at you. How could you keep all this information form me? And when did you become so jealous?" He leaned into me kissing me softly smiling. "You are the only person I fall asleep with. You are the only person I want to wake up to every morning. Seriously James." He straightened up grabbing my face again making me look directly into his eyes. "The only time you ever need to worry about me, and some rich guy, is if I need you to be." I gently laid my head back onto the headboard, staring at him. He looked sincere, and like seeing those pictures of him didn't even bother him. The ones that really pissed me off where the ones of us at home. He literally had to have been standing outside the window. Like the one of us on the couch. I was flat on my back staring up at the TV with Logan on my stomach biting my neck and ear. I was trying to concentrate on the show, and because I knew when the picture was taken, last week, I knew I was also trying not to embarrass our friends who were still staying with us at that time. Why those pictures bugged me, and made me mad, Logan didn't even care. I think that alone bothered me even more.

I got maybe an hour worth of sleep. I let Logan snuggle onto, or into my body, while I tossed and turned but I felt so disconnected from him. There was something wrong with him. How he could think this way, act this way was so new to me. It wasn't like the Logan I knew and cared deeply for. Maybe Louis had already slipped into his mind. Maybe something had already happened, and Logan couldn't tell me. Or maybe I was overthinking things. Maybe I am just a jealous dick. I mean, it's highly unlikely, but not completely impossible.

While Logan took a shower the following morning I changed into some clean sweats and a clean shirt slipping on some socks and shoes. I sat on the edge of our unmade bed and waited for him. When he picked up Carlos for his new job, I would just stay with Kendall and I'd go with him to pick up furniture for their house. It was going to be a long, stressful, painful day, and I was really starting to wish I had made myself sleep. I was actually considering just going back to bed, texting Kendall to pick me up whenever he was ready but by the time I convinced myself I needed sleep, Logan was running a hand through my hair asking if I was ready. I smiled and nodded standing up, casually linking his fingers with mine. I grabbed his bag from him while he grabbed my sweater and his coat. We walked downstairs, told Romeo to be a good boy and that I'd be back in a while to check on him and we were out the door.

The first thing I saw when we pulled up to the house was the plastic covering the broken glass in the front window. I bet Kendall was glad I helped him do that last night because it was now pouring rain. I was the only one who got out and went up to the door because Logan didn't want to ruin his hair or his suit. I knocked and leaned against the door frame shoving my hand sin the front pockets of my zip up sweater. I heard heavy footsteps down stairs and Carlos's name get called softly, just as the door got unlocked and pulled open. Kendall's tiered face appeared along with a glass of what looked like chocolate milk. "He'll be out in a minute. Come on in…where's Logan?"

"Dint want to get wet." He nodded turning and walking off. I followed in quick shutting the door shivering. He walked down a dark hallway before tuning, opening a door and pressing a button. I heard the garage door open, and when Kendall walked out into the completely empty garage, I followed again seeing Logan in the car still. He smiled and turned it back on, pulling up into the covered garage. I stood next to Kendall as Logan shut off the car and got out smiling between the two of us.

"Pussy. It's just a little bit of rain." Logan frowned and moved forward punching Kendall in the chest. Kendall smiled and pushed back at him chugging down the rest of his chocolate milk. I heard the door to the house get opened again and turned, smiling at Carlos. He didn't look happy. He didn't look mad. In fact he kind of looked sad and scared. He walked to us quick hugging around Kendall who hugged him back leaning down into his ear. He kissed it, rubbing his back softly and sighed. "You're going to be fine babe. No one is even going to notice." I turned to Logan confused and all he had to do was point to his face. He mouthed "bruises and cuts" and I got it fast. I also knew he was probably feeling down on himself because of what Kendall said yesterday, but seeing how they were now, made me think they might have made up. "What if I say I'll come by at lunch, and if anyone has said anything to you before then, you point him out and James and I will kill them?" Logan sighed walking to me and laid his head on my chest.

"Does everything always have to end in violence?" Kendall shrugged slowly walking Carlos to the passenger side of Logan's car.

"I'm a hockey player. I only know violence." I smirked wrapping around Logan and kissed the top of his head. While Kendall and Carlos made out against the open door of the car, Logan and I hugged.

"Hey your still not thinking about…what we talked about last night are you?" I closed my eyes shaking my head softly. "Because I just want you to know, if someone, anyone, were to ever do something to me, say something to me, to hurt me, or make me uncomfortable, you are the first person I would go to." I nodded again pulling him in closer to me. Just as I opened my mouth to tell him I trusted him, his phone went off. He pushed away just a little and pulled it out answering fast, looking up at me. "Hello?" He smiled at me, but it faded fast. "He's what?" We separated completely him walking to his car still looking at me. "Wait, why are the cops there?" I caught eyes with Kendall who seemed to grab ahold of Carlos and hold onto him tight. Carlos sighed, turned and kissed the side of his mouth.

"I love you. I'll let you know how it's going on my break. Please don't get ugly furniture and feed James. He looks sick. This sounds important, so we should probably get going." I held the door open for Logan as he got in, listening intently. I bent down carefully and kissed his temple before standing up, and closing his door. He held the phone between his shoulder and ear and smiled big at me, mouthing sorry, pulling on his seatbelt. I heard Carlos's door also close and stepped back as Logan backed out of the driveway handing his phone over to Carlos, talking still. Kendall and I stood next to each other and waved as they drove off and disappeared. We even stayed standing there, after they had left, for almost 5 minutes, before I turned to Kendall and shook my head.

"Logan doesn't find anything wrong with Louis having pictures of him. He also doesn't want me worrying about it, because I should trust him to come to me if something happens." He chuckled and glanced up at the ceiling sighing out.

"Well if it makes you feel any better, I had to work my ass off trying to make Carlos feel better last night. I literally told him working for Louis would be great and an amazing opportunity. I pulled my bullshit line that anything he doe sis perfect, but I wanted so hard to show the pictures to Carlos and tell him exactly what kind of man he's working for. But I didn't. And to top it all off I tried to bring up the fact that we haven't had sex in weeks, and he shut me down. Again. I swear to God if I don't find a fucking release I'm fucking the next thing that walks by." I turned away from him fast and tried to wrap my head around everything he said as best as I could. "Shit sorry dude…you wanna get some food before we do anything, and talk about the fact the love of our lives are working for a psychotic asshole?" I laughed and nodded pulling my hood. "Alright…let me lock the house up. And then you got to help me figure out how to get in Carlos's pants because if I can't I'm getting in yours." I turned quick to look at him but he had his back turned to me and was walking to the door. "I'm just fucking with your head Diamond…take it easy."


	12. Chapter 12: Doubts, Belief

I had no reason to be nervous. I wasn't in trouble for anything, nor was I guilty of anything. Yet, my palms were sweating, my stomach was turning and my mouth was bone dry. I guess that was the effect of these cops. This was their job. To try to break down people to get the truth. But I was telling the truth and honestly, I was uncomfortable with the reason the cops were here to begin with. "Okay Logan, a few more questions and you can get to work." I glanced up at the cop across the table from me, swallowed hard and nodded. "Why were you out of work yesterday?" I set my hands on my lap and remained staring in the cops eyes.

"I was purposed to the night before…when I came in yesterday, Mr. Stevens saw my ring and gave me the day off to spend with my fiancé." He nodded writing down more notes. "I'm sorry I'm just a little worried here…but is there any reason you would have to come here and question us? Is there any evidence of foul play?" He looked up slowly and smirked setting his notepad down.

"You watch a lot cop shows?" I chuckled and shrugged but got very serious quick. "Henry was reported missing this morning at 5, by his roommate. Henry didn't come home at all and his roommate is very worried. We usually wait for a full 24 hours but his roommate was insistent. The last known place Henry was known to be, was here, and after getting your boss's information, we know after Henry was fired, he left the building right at 4. His car is still in his parking spot." I sat back and nodded slowly. "One more question Logan if you don't mind…how was Henry with everyone here? I mean…did he make any enemies? Would there be any reason for someone to be angry with him?"

"Well yesterday when Louis called me, informing he fired Henry for stealing, I started to question the kid. He has always been so nice. Sweet kid, with a good head on his shoulders. Everyone in the office liked him. I have never heard of any problems." He smiled and closed his notebook standing up.

"Okay…thank you Mr. Mitchell. We will try to find him and if we need anything else we'll contact you." He reached in his jacket pulled out a business card and handed it over to me. I stood up quick and took it from him looking down at his name. John Steele, detective. "If you hear of anything, Logan, do not hesitate to call me, alright?" I looked up and slowly started to follow him out of the conference room staying quiet. When we walked back into the front of the office, I cringed seeing the three uniformed officers looking through Henry's desk in the front. "Mr. Stevens, if you hear from him at any time, just give me a call. If we find him, we'll let you know." I watched standing beside Louise who just walked out of my office with Carlos behind, as they shook hands. The detective turned to the other cops who told him they got as much as they would need and started to walk to the elevators. I looked over at Louis who actually looked really stressed out. Like, for the first time, since I had known him, this business savvy, smart, calm headed guy, looked worried. His tie was lose around his neck, he had bags under his eyes, his jacket was off, and his sleeves were rolled up to the elbows on his arms. I reached out gently and set a hand on his shoulder smiling small.

"You alright?"

"No not really…I know I fired the kid yesterday, but I'm worried about him missing. It isn't like him to not go home. And with his car still being here…I'm just worried is all." I smiled reassuringly and looked over at Carlos who was staring at the 4 cops still around Henry's, now Carlos's desk. He was looking at one, John, in particular like he knew him or something. Maybe it was the guy Kendall knew that worked in the LAPD. "You'll have to start showing Carlos the system on your computer for now. And while you were being questioned I had a little interview with him and if I wasn't convinced before, I am now. I like him…he's a fun kid." Carlos turned to Louis fast and blushed looking down. "He also knows his way around a joke so it will be fun working with him. Before the day is over, make sure Linda talks to him and gives him the packet." I nodded crossing my arms over my chest looking at Louis who pulled his cell phone out of his pocket read something on it and groaned. "Crap…I need to go to a meeting that has been moved from tomorrow to today. Damn-it…okay it should only take a few hours and it's going to be at the Bank of America building downtown. We should be getting that file from London today, so look out for that. While your training Mr. Garcia, if you can, just try to handle your job and his, unless he catches on fast, which I won't doubt. I'm so sorry to dump all this on you but…" I reached out again putting my hand on Louis's forearm making him stop and stare down at me.

"Hey…just go to your meeting and take your time coming back to work. I can handle this. It's going to be alright." He chuckled, slipped his one of his hands around my waist and pulled me into him. I smiled hugging around his torso and sighed softly. "It will be okay. They will find him."

"I hope so…I just feel so awful. I fired him, and now he's missing." I squeezed around him tighter and shook my head against his chest fast.

"Don't think like that alright. This isn't your fault. You did what you had to do." He breathed in hard over me and both his hands slowly moved up my back rubbing softly. I glanced to the side seeing Carlos giving us a weird look. I cleared my throat and pulled way slowly smiling at Louis. He laughed and turned quick walking into his office. I watched him grab his jacket and his briefcase, before he walked himself back out putting his keys in his pocket. "See you when you get back. Good luck." He laughed and nodded walking towards the elevator, just as the cops were. I waited, in silence, patiently as they detective talked to Louis quietly both smiling small waiting for the elevators to ding open. Once they did and all five men stepped inside, I waved and smiled one last time at them and turned to Carlos. "Okay buddy…I need to check something for Louis real quick in his office. I'm going to bring up the software for customer information and show you how to do it, and then let you try yourself. If the phone rings, just answer, hi this is Carlos for CbV Corp. Mr. Stevens isn't in today, can I leave a message. If they need to talk to someone, anyone, there is a piece of laminated paper by my phone that has the name and number of people in the different departments here." He frowned and nodded slowly as I lead him into my office. "If someone needs to be to talk to Louis now, I'll take the call." He nodded again as I sat him down in my desk. I pulled off the top file on my desk of a huge pile and opened it up.

Once I was sure Carlos could do it and he told me he was confident with it, I left him alone telling him to call me for anything and walked into Louis's office. I hurried to his desk, sat down behind it and turned his computer on. I drummed lightly on his huge desk and glanced around his office. Ever since James showed me the pictures last night and told me everything he did tell me, I had become a little confused. I hated that my mind wasn't letting me trust James right away. Why was it so hard for me to believe everything James was telling me, was the truth? And why, if I knew, rationally, Louis was obsessed with me could not be true, why was I snooping in his office now? As soon as the thought entered my head his computer screen popped up and I entered his password fast. I waited impatiently as his desktop came up and I saw his files saved on to his computer. I opened it up and groaned seeing more than a thousand files all marked with a name and number. They were all his private files on people's funds and their investments. None of that mattered to me however and I quickly went into the search section and typed in my name. I knew if that cop had found a file on his computer with those pictures of me, it would be under my name, like he said. And of course as soon as I put my name in, one folder came up. It was simply marked as my name. I swallowed hard, clicking on it twice and another file popped up. I first noticed the size of the file. There was literally 500 pictures in the file. I move in closer to the computer and clicked on the first one. It was of me, the first day I met Louis. My interview. I looked like a nervous wreck. But I felt like an even bigger one right now. I clicked the next button, and gasped quietly seeing me sitting on James's lap as we ate the dinner he made me the day of my interview. I could tell I was talking, and eating at the same time, while James stared up at me. I again clicked the next button and covered my mouth with my closed fist seeing me, in bed, with nothing but our dark blue sheet covering me. I was on my stomach with the sheet only covering form my butt down. I was fast asleep with James asleep next to me. Our legs were tangled and his hand was resting softly on the middle of my bare back. How he could have taken this kind of picture…scared me. He had to literally be in our house to do it. I sat back softly clicking the next button over and over. Every single picture, scared me more and more. Some of the pictures, he had to have been right in my face, and It made me wonder why I didn't even notice it. My brain kept telling me to stop looking at them, you're just going to make yourself sick, but I couldn't stop. Not until I heard a phone ring. I looked to the phone on Louis desk and after the second ring it was answered. I forced myself to look away from the screen and listen to Carlos's sweet soft voice as he answered. It was two minutes before his voice stopped, and I finally got the courage to look back the screen. For some reason, I didn't notice the last picture I stopped on. Probably because it wasn't a picture. It was a video. Of me in my office. The still frame of the video was of me, bent over my desk with James behind me, pounding the living hell out of me. I shakily pushed play with the mouse and sat back clutching around my stomach seeing the video start. I wanted so desperately to look away again, but I sat back letting one arm clutch around my stomach, and the other cover over my mouth. There was no sound, which I was grateful for, but I knew what conversation we were having as he fucked me against my desk. This was complete proof that James was right. About everything, and I had my doubts about believing him. "Oh hey Logan…" I jumped up and quickly closed the file window. I stood up seeing Carlos walk in slowly holding a piece of paper looking confused. "This one doesn't have a payment date. Did they not pay yet, or do they not have to pay yet?" I walked to him swallowing hard and took the paper clearing my head.

"Oh uhm…it was put in wrong. The date is right here." I pointed to it, noticing how shaky my hand was. We locked eyes and he nodded slowly before turning and walking out. I didn't hesitate to pull my phone out and dial James. I put the phone to my ear and closed my eyes sighing out.

"Hey baby." I forced a pained smile and walked back to his desk sitting down hard.

"Hey-hey babe." I brought the video back up and frowned seeing my office now empty. Not a second later, James came almost running in and fell down into a chair, looking awkward. The video stopped then.

"You okay…you sound…weird." I again started to click through the photos seeing more and more of me. At work, and a lot of me at home. "Does it have to do with that phone call you got this morning?"

"Oh uhm well…Henry, our receptionist didn't get home last night. He's missing."

"Oh wow…are you alright baby? You doing okay?" I felt my throat swell. There was another video, except this one wasn't of me at all. It was taken at Carlos and Kendall's house. It was early morning, and the guy holding the camera, as soon as I pushed play, he handed someone a bat. Two guys started to repeatedly beat my best friend. I know my phone dropped from my hand because I heard it smash to the ground. Carlos's was yelling. He was just crying. And probably screaming at them to stop. He covered his face and his head but it didn't matter. They kicked him, hit him with the bat. I am actually shocked, Carlos can walk. I watched all three minutes of them hit, and hurt my best friend. When the video was over I glanced over to the door, seeing Carlos walking in holding his phone up to his ear.

"No he's fine Ken…he's right here…Loges…you are freaking Kendall and James out….Loges…" He stopped short, a few feet from me and looked down at the computer. I closed the file even before he could look at it, making him frown. "I don't know…he seems sick. Kind of pale actually." I swallowed hard and yanked his phone out of his hand making him sigh in frustration.

"Kendall?"

"Yeah…hold on let me put on James."

"No!" Carlos jumped a little and I closed my eyes breathing out low and quietly.

"Logan? What's wrong?"

"Just…just when you and Kendall come in for lunch, I just need to talk to you, and only you, alright?"


	13. Chapter 13: Police

I was staring, probably looking way too mean for something so small. But maybe it wasn't that small. Maybe the reason Logan only wanted to talk to Kendall was because something serious was happening and he knew if he told me, I'd commit murder. But I was supposed to be able to trust him. How could I trust him when he'd rather go to our friend instead of me. So my anger and my pissed off attitude towards Kendall since he called, and Logan said he only wanted to talk to Kendall, was completely justified. I thought anyway. "Dude…how well do you know me?" I looked away from him fast shoving my hand sin my sweat pant pockets. I looked up at the green numbers going all the way up to 18. "Whatever Logan tells me, I'm telling you."

"Even if he asks you not to?" He remained quiet, making me turn to him and stare him down again. I leaned against the wall of the elevator and gritted my teeth hard. He sipped form his milkshake he demanded we got before we picked them up for lunch and looked at me through hooded eyes. "Kendall."

"James…" He brought his milkshake down and stepped towards me just as the doors dinged open. "If there is something seriously going on, you will be the first to know. He can get on his knees and beg me not to say anything but I will. And if it has anything to do with that piece of shit Louis I'm going to kill…"

"Babe!" We both turned and hurried out of the elevator towards Carlos who was standing up from behind the front desk. "Look at us! Now you're the one coming to see me at work!" Kendall smiled and walked around the desk reaching out for Carlos. Carlos got on his tip toes kissed Kendall and held his neck gently. "Please tell me you took your pill today." Kendall nodded in between each kiss Carlos was peppering on his face. I rolled my eyes looking at Logan's closed door and leaned against the front counter of Carlos's desk. I turned back to them and cleared my throat to stop the make out fest but didn't have to. The phone on his desk started ringing loudly, making Carlos pull away, sit down at his desk and answer it with a smile. "Hi, this is Carlos Garcia for CbV Finance Corp. What can I help you with?" He grinned really big up at Kendall who bent down kissing his head, also smiling. "He is in a meeting right now and won't be back for another hour, maybe two, but his assistant is here and can help you…of course you can leave a message. What's your name?" Carlos picked up a pen, and immediately started writing down a fairly long message, along with a name and number. "Okay...absolutely. He will get it as soon as he walks in the office Dave…of course. Have a nice day." He hung up the phone, ripped off the piece of paper and stood up smiling still, between me and Kendall. "I've been doing that all day, and I love it! Do you know how many compliments I've been getting on my manners and my voice. And I got to meet a few people in here and I guess they all love me!" Carlos grabbed around the back of Kendall's neck pulling him down, smashing their lips together. I carefully smacked my head on the counter top next to a small case of pens and groaned. "Let me go put this in Louis's office because this is a very important client, and then James and I will go." I stood up fast and watched Carlos hop into Louis's office just to bounce back out.

"Wait…why just us?" Carlos frowned at me as he pulled on his coat and looked to Logan's closed door.

"Logan's taking a call right now, and he needs to talk to Kendall. I know…it doesn't sound good but he's assured me, it's nothing to worry about and after he talks to Kendall he's going to talk to us, so don't worry ya big lug. He said you can just go in so…I'll see you when you come to the café across the street." Kendall straightened out Carlos's coat and held onto the lapels as he pulled him in for another kiss. I slapped my hand down hard on the counter top making them pull away, blushing. Carlos grabbed his phone off his desk and walked to me gently pushing me to the elevator. While he pushed the button, I watched Kendall open Logan's door slowly and step in. As I was pushed into the elevator I caught a glimpse of Logan sitting at his desk, smiling small at Kendall. He was still on his phone but he waved him into his office anyway.

It was a little weird. Carlos and I didn't really hang out one on one, a lot. Walking across the street in the pouring down rain was the highlight of our time spent together so far. He sat across from me and looked through his menu about 5 times before the waiter came over and took our drink orders. I told him to give us another 5 minutes before we ordered and then we again, sat in complete silence. I tried not to look at him because it was just so weird. And I felt sick looking at him. He was bruised and cut up and part of me thinks it's my fault. My fault because I let Logan work with a pshyco like Louis and I knew, I just knew Louis was the reason Carlos got hurt. My fault. "So James…how's your job going? I watched the last episode with Kendall yesterday about him being switched." I looked directly in his eyes and smiled nodding.

"Yeah it's going good…it's football season now so I' have more to deal with now."

"Do you have your own fantasy team so you can help out your viewers or something…Kendall was telling me about it but…" He stopped and suddenly sat up straight and swallowed hard. His eyes went somewhere over my head making me turn and look at the few tables behind me. The first two right behind me, were empty but the third was being occupied by a man. Someone I had never seen before, but form the looks of it, I never wanted to even meet. He looked like a thug…a criminal. I turned back to Carlos who looked like he was having a miny panic attack. He was clutching onto the table cloth and was heaving hard and fast.

"Los?" He closed his eyes and put his head down breathing harder and faster now. I jumped up quick and waked around the table, to sit down next to him. I first put a hand on his shoulder getting no response. So, I set a hand on his leg and wrapped my arm around his shoulders pulling him into me. His head molded into my neck and both his arms folded up as he pushed hard into me. "Buddy…what's wrong? What's going on?"

"He…he had the…the bat." I looked up quick and saw the same guy, covered in tattoo's smiling sweetly at the waiter taking his order. When she walked away he looked directly at me and smiled big. I tightened around Carlos and glared at the guy who reached in his pocket, pulled out a phone, typed something, not looking away from me, and then shook his phone. Carlos jumped slightly and pulled his phone out, still having a hard time breathing. There was a tiny gasp from him making me tear away from this jackass and look at my terrified friend. I saw a text on his phone and gently yanked the phone out of Carlos's shaky hand.

"_How's the eye_?" I looked up quick and slammed his phone down on the table and stood up. My arm was grabbed and pulled hard.

"No James. Don't do anything. Please don't leave me." I sat back down fast making the guy sitting three tables away laugh and sit back shaking his head slightly. "Shit…here comes Kendall and Logan…uhm…I'm fine alright. Please don't say anything to Kendall. Please James. Just go sit back down." I got up fast, staring the guy down all the way and sat down hard cracking my knuckles staring at Carlos. He was drinking his water dry shaking a little still. He put his glass down hard and then shot up wiping his mouth. "I'll be right back…I need to use…use the restroom." He set his napkin on the table and walked away, into the crowd fast, disappearing. I sat back shaking my head and picked up my own glass of water.

"if I didn't know any better I would think Carlos just left as soon as he saw us." I ignored both Kendall and Loan as they sat down staring at me, shaking out of their coats. "Everything alright?" I turned directly to Logan who was now picking up his menu, slightly smiling.

"I don't know. Is everything alright?" He looked up at me slowly and frowned leaning in. His hand rubbed on my inner thigh and he kissed my chin.

"It was something really stupid I needed to talk to Kendall about. Please don't worry about it. Trust me." I leaned into him making him sit back a little and look at me almost concerned. I put my arm on the back of his chair and set my other hand on his, on my leg.

"Look behind us, very casually." He sighed out and turned his head and gently pulled my arm off the back of his chair as if that was why he was turning around in the first place. He then set my arm on his arm rest and shrugged. "Carlos said he is one of the guys that broke in and beat him." His mouth dropped open slowly and he turned around again. When he turned back to me, we both turned to Kendall and I was going to say it to Kendall but Carlos sat back down in his chair and picked up his glass of water finishing it off. When he set it back down on the table he smiled over at Kendall and leaned over to him. They shared a small kiss before going to their menu's and talking about what they were going to get. And just like that, no one was asking if everyone was alright, what was so important Logan needed to talk to Kendall about…it was like we were back to our happy, normal lives. But nothing was normal. I kept glancing over my shoulder at the guy sitting three tables away from us. He was always watching us. And every time I would look back at our table, Carlos would be looking at me, hopeful almost. As if to make sure I wouldn't do anything stupid. Like killing him in this café. And then there was Kendall and Logan who were always stealing secret glances at each other, making stupid jokes, laughing at those stupid jokes. It was almost like they were fucking flirting. Right in front of Carlos and I. I was so irritated by the time lunch was over, I was glad Carlos and Logan had to go back to work. Really glad.

I walked Logan all the way into his office and sat on the edge of his desk right next to him as he sat down in his chair. He turned his computer back on and looked up at me smiling. He grabbed my left, raised it and kissed the palm softly. "I'll bring dinner home tonight. I know you have to do your show…" I nodded reaching out with my right hand and ran it over his hair softly. It was a little wet from the rain but managed to stay in place. "And you should know I offered to bring desert to this dinner on Friday with Louis. Maybe we could make something?" I laughed and nodded standing up. I kissed his forehead one last time before turning and wlakign out of his office. "I love you baby." I turned in the door and nodded waving slightly.

"Love you too handsome." He smirked and turned slowly to his computer, biting his bottom lip. I walked out to Kendall who was leaning aginst the counter where Carlos's desk was. But Carlso wasn't there. "Where is Carlos?"

"Bathroom. He wanted me to tell you thanks for sitting with him…whatever that means and that he'll see ya soon." I only nodded pushing the button for the elevator and sighed out hard. "So I know I need to get a few more things for the house but I need to run an errand. I need to go talk to a guy named John Steele. He's a detective, and he thinks he can help us with what happened to Carlos." The doors to the elevator dinged open and Kendall stepped in. I was left speechless. He almost pushed the button but dropped his hand staring at me. "Dude…let's go…" I turned quick and walked right back into Logan's office just as the phone rang and he answered it.

"This is Logan Mitchell for CbV Corp, how can I help you?" He frowned at me and I walked right to the chairs across his desk. "No I'm sorry ma'am he's just now finishing up a meeting. Would you like to leave a message…" He pulled the phone away from his ear, frowned at it and then hung up turning to me. "What's wrong babe?"

"How do you know a guy named John Steele?" He turned to the door fast, got angry in less than a second and stood up.

"He's the detective looking for Henry. He was here this morning. I only asked Kendall to go talk to him because I know how angry, how fast you can get. I just know if we have the cops on our side…" I slowly stood up straight and it hit me.

"He already has the cops on his side." Logan stopped talking and stared at me confused. "Loges I think your boss is…"

"Hello Mr. Garcia!" We both stopped and turned to the door to see Kendall getting out of the way showing us Louis had just gotten off the elevator. He smiled big at Carlos who sat at his desk smiling back. Louis then continued his walk to Logan's open door and stopped frowning. "Wow…we have a few celebrities in our midst. How exciting!" Louis stopped right in front of Kendall, who I noticed really tense. "I hope Carlos has told you, you are both invited to my small dinner party on Friday. I know it's short notice because today is Wednesday but as Carlos is my newest employee I want to welcome him into this family by cooking him a damn good meal. And you too!" Kendall gave a fake, really fake ass smile and nodded along showing his hand sin his sweater pockets. "Well if you gentlemen will excuse me, I probably have a thousand calls to answer back and a few hundred reports to write up." Louis nodded his head at both Kendall and I and I nodded back. Louis walked away quick and I turned to Logan who was walking ot me shaking his head.

"Whatever it is, go deal with it, with Kendall. I trust you. Just don't get hurt…or arrested. Please." I nodded and cupped his face, kissing his lips softly. I pulled away just to grab Kendall and walk us out of Logan's room.

"Dude…what the fuck?" I smiled and said my goodbye to Carlos who told Kendall eh loved him and he'd see him when he got home. I pushed the elevator button a few hundred times before it opened, and shoved Kendall inside. When the doors closed behind me I shook my head clenching my fists and breathed out hard.

"I know who attacked Kendall. I also know why they told him not to tell the police." Kendall became very serious, very fast and I raised an eyebrow. "Because they were the police."


	14. Chapter 14: Driver's License

**A/N **

**This is way overdue. Sorry…but I made it long so enjoy! And of course…review!**

I'm not a very superstitious person. I do believe everything that happens, is supposed to happen. I don't think rain is a bad omen, and I don't think if you step on a crack, you'll break your mothers back. Just like it's okay to walk under a ladder, and cross paths with a black cat. In fact I used to have a black cat. With little white paws. I called her boots. But my point is that if something odd or "eerie" happens, it doesn't mean the grim reaper is around the corner to suck out your soul. It's just bad weather. I wish I could convince more people to think like that. "The first million I have in my bank account, I'm buying us a house in this area." I glanced over to my left and extended my left hand setting it on his. He turned his hand slowly, almost at the same slow speed he was driving and laced our fingers together. "Can you imagine what we could do with a house like these? Have our own basketball court…a pool, a hot tub…maybe have three or four extra rooms for a gym for me, and an office for you. Oh and we could have a room just for Romeo."

"You spoil that dog James. He's going to end up being a fat needy jerk who only likes his daddy." My hand was squeezed and I turned my head to look back out my window as I yawned. My body and my mind were exhausted and I almost canceled this dinner but I was curious to see Louis's house and I didn't want Carlos and Kendall to go by themselves. First of all, Carlos barely knew the guy and that wouldn't be fair. And Kendall…well Kendall doesn't have a filter, and after what I showed him on Wednesday he hasn't been the easiest person to talk to. He won't mind just blurting out that he thinks Louis had something to do with the break in. If I was there, I would be able to help Carlos keep Kendall quiet. I think I have done a good job of convincing James Louis isn't a bad guy. At least enough to make him not think he had anything to hurt Carlos or that he's obsessed with me. "The first million I have in my bank account I'm taking us on vacation. To…Rome or maybe Paris."

"I don't speak Italian or French." I laughed quietly and squinted trying to read the street names passing us.

"That's why you have me handsome. I think we're getting close. You remember the house number right?"

"Of course." We both went quiet, him gently rubbing my hand, still in his, with his fingers. "So…I know you told me not to bring this up tonight…" I groaned as loud as I could and set my head back closing my eyes. My hand was squeezed and raised. He kissed the top of my hand and the ring on my finger and sighed. "I know…I know alright I just have one thing bugging the hell out of me." I rolled my head gently to look at him and watched as he turned down a street, hopefully the right one. "You literally saw all those pictures on his computer, saw a video of us having sex on his computer and to top it all off with a cherry, you saw a video of someone, beating the shit out of our best friend. All on his computer. Why is that not enough proof for you that this dirt bag is, in fact a dirt bag?"

"James I've said this once already." He looked at me quickly before paying attention to the road again. "Louis just fired an assistant who thought loved him. Louis probably told Matthew a million and one secrets. How do you know everything that has been happening, hasn't been Matthew's fault? I mean the guy was just trying to get up in the financial world and he thought sleeping with the CEO would help. When Louis said no, Matthew freaked out. You saw the police report. Why is only Louis, someone you barely know, capable of doing this to us? To me, and Carlos? Why isn't Matthew just as capable? Taking pictures of me, planting cameras in my office, Louis's…everywhere I went…and then send them to Louis to maybe black mail him in some way? Why doesn't that seem to make sense to you?" I breathed out hard staring at the side of his face, only seeing a blank reaction. I smiled small, knowing I had won, yet again and looked straight ahead. The first thing I saw was Kendall's car parked on the side of the road a little way up by a huge, mansion. I frowned noticing as James pulled up behind Kendall's car, and turned off our car, there were two people in the car in front of us. I glanced to James who sighed and took off his seatbelt.

"Kendall, no doubt, has said or done something really stupid." I smiled and pulled my hood on from my black coat and took off my seatbelt pushing open my door. When I slammed my door shut I looked ahead of me to see Carlos getting out of the car, not looking happy at all. He looked at me but looked away fast walking up to the walkway. He didn't look back at Kendall who said his name quietly. I stifled a chuckle walking up to James and wrapping my arms around his right one as he led us up the walkway after Kendall. "What happened buddy?" Kendall only shook his head as he situated the beanie on his head and walked up the huge beautiful porch getting right next to Carlos as he knocked on the door. Kendall wrapped around Carlos's waste but Carlos shoved him off. I smiled and looked up at James who was also smiling. "I must say you two are very cute. All mad and what not."

"Shut it James." I shoved my face into James shoulder and giggled along James.

"Gentlemen!" I turned quick and smiled bright at Louis who was holding the door open for us motioning us to go in. Carlos shoved past Kendall, literally shoving him away from him, and walked in the house handing what looked like a pie to Louis. I didn't even notice he had it in his hands. Then again he had his back to me since getting out of the car. But seeing him hand the pie to Louis made em remember the bottle of wine in my own car.

"James…the wine is in the car." He sighed and kissed my head turning and running back to the car fast. I smiled, walking in behind Kendall who looked awkward and uncomfortable shaking Louis's hand. When I walked in, I shivered a little and let Louis pull me in for a hug, comforting me instantly. "We brought you a bottle of wine."

"That's not necessary but thank you." We pulled away and I laughed gently taking off my coat. "And were going to be drinking a little champagne tonight! We need to celebrate!" I frowned as eh took my coat and walked to Kendall and Carlos taking their coats. Kendall also gave him, his beanie giving him a death glare. Louis just smile back and I cleared my throat getting all three of their attention.

"What are we celebrating?" Louise handed the coats to a lady who was probably his maid and clapped his hands together rubbing them.

"Well we'll talk about it by the fire and wait for James. He'll want to be here of this. Why don't you guys go ahead and walk in there and get comfortable and I'll bring out some drinks and some appetizers." I nodded and walked to an open French door stepping in, letting my jaw drop to the floor. It looked like maybe this was his living room. There was a huge fire place on the side wall with a nice big flat screen mounted up on the wall above it. On the mantle were pictures of Louis and his family probably. The fire was blazing and it was the first thing I went to. My hands were freezing, so I decided to stand in front of the fire and warm them while looking around. While I turned I saw Kendall and Carlos on a brown leather couch not looking happy or at each other at all. They were actually sitting on either end of the couch, anger written all over their faces. I sighed and looked back down at the fire shaking my head.

"Can you two get a long please, for just one night while were at dinner? Seriously…nothing is that important to be this pissed off about."

"How can you just stand there and be okay with all the shit they did behind our backs." I turned quick and stared at Carlos who was now standing pointing a mean finger back at Kendall. "He is a jealous idiot who has to be the big bad tough guy, "protecting" me when all he's doing is running around in a circle chasing his own tail!" I frowned and looked at Kendall who stood up fast, just as James walked in holding the bottle of wine. "They are making shit up Logan, and you out of all people shouldn't be okay with that! Saying this guy has pictures and videos of you…"

"Well he does." I gave a evil glare to James who shrugged and sat on the couch in between Kendall and Carlos. "And he had a video of you getting the shit kicked out of you." Carlos turned to me fast after glaring at James and stomped his foot, kind of in a childlike manner.

"This is what I mean!" Carlos walked ot me and forced me to keep eye contact with him. "Kendall wants em to quite because he doesn't want em to get hurt, and I've tried to tell him there is nothing to worry about and that I can take care of myself but…" I quickly set my hands on Carlos's shoulder and shushed him.

"Calm down. Don't worry about any of that. Let them have their wild theories and do stupid shit. They can't hurt anyone. Trust me." He sighed and looked down crossing his arms over his chest. I let him go, walked around him and went right next to James on the couch. I sat down roughly, glaring at both of them and mouthing. Idiot to Kendall who looked away and also pouted like Carlos was doing. James draped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer into him. I wrapped an arm around his stomach and crossed my legs as best as I could.

"Okay I have this spicy jalapeno artichoke dip that is just amazing on crackers." We all looked to the door and watched Louis set down a plate and four empty glasses. "Let me go get some plates and I will share the exciting news." He walked out quickly, me not missing a chance to look at his butt. I now the guy is attractive. Everyone does. I can't help myself.

"Eyes up pervert." James voice slithered into my ear making me shiver. I elbowed him in the ribs, making both of us giggle.

"I'm going to find the bathroom." Carlos was out of the room faster than the speed of sound but it gave me the opportunity to reach across James and smack Kendall's chest. Hard. He shoved my hand away and rubbed it whining quietly while glaring at me.

"You had to tell him there was a video of him getting beaten!? What the hell is wrong with you!? There is a reason I didn't want him to know Kendall! Can you figure out what that was?" He gave me a dumb look making me just that much more pissed off. "Kendall he already feels weak and helpless around you and James because of your guys size and strength…imagine how he must feel knowing he couldn't protect himself when someone broke into his house. And to top it all off to know they taped it must make him feel even worse. SO good job asshole on making your boyfriend, the guy you claim you love, feel pathetic. And awesome job demanding he quit his job even after all these years he's stuck by your side and watched every game you've ever played where you['ve gotten your nose broke, your jaw knocked out of place, and countless fights with different guys! He never once asked you to quit because he knows it makes you happy, but I guess only you get to be happy in your relationship! I can see a relationship for you is you being a protective dick who has a hold of the reigns to tight!" I sat back hard and fast and looked straight ahead at the fire. James gently rubbed my arm making em dig deeper into him. The whole room was dead quiet except for the fire cracking. And it stayed quiet until Louis walked in and set down some small plates and a few napkins.

"Please help yourself to anything. I'm going to go check our dinner while Carlos uses the restroom, so please make yourselves at home." I smiled bright at him as he backed out of the room whistling quietly.

A few minutes passed with James and I talking quietly while eating form one late of the dip and crackers. Kendall stayed on his corner of the couch pouting not saying one word. I stayed very close to James, practically on his lap and occasionally I would catch him looking at Kendall offering him some food. But Kendall was being a world class dick and if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have noticed how long both Carlos and Louis were gone. When they walked in together something definitely seemed wrong. I could see it in Carlos's eyes. He had been crying and I'm not sure if that's because he was just so angry at Kendall or if it had something to do with Louis, who I noticed, and a hand on Carlos's back. That seemed very off to me. And as soon as Carlos got close enough he gently sat on the arm rest of the couch closest to Kendall. He reached down, grabbed his arm and laced their fingers together. Everyone, including James, who was way too into his crackers and dip noticed the odd look Kendall gave Carlos, but no one had time to ask about it. "Alright…so I must admit I knew about this last weekend and the real reason I wanted to have this dinner tonight was because of some exciting news I have for you, Logan." My cheeks went a little red as I looked to Louis who was now pouring champagne into five glasses. "I received a phone call last Friday night as I was finishing up some work in my office, from our headquarters in New York. Apparently your work ethic, your skill level, and the fact that you can speak five different languages has spread like wild fire." Louis handed out the glasses only staring at me. He had a smile on his face, that sort of looked like he was…proud. "Someone was very impressed with how you handled the French customer. SO impressed in fact…" Louis sat in a chair sort of close to the fire and raised his glass. "They are making you head of your own department. Foreign affairs." My mouth parted slightly and he sat up fast waving his hand through the air. "The details are still being worked out. From what they've told me, you are going to keep your office, have a 20,000 dollar salary raise and technically be your very own boss. Now I know, just as well as you do that New York has a lot of people who can speak every language you can but for right now, you are our best bet. We want to expand to Spain, and Italy and maybe even Germany and you are going to be our guy for that. Much like what I do, with the customers on U.S soil, you will have a client list, you will work on their financial portfolio's and convince them to work with us. A lot of what you already od, but maybe a 50 percent work load increase." I don't think I've taken a solid breath since he said my own department. My mind felt numb, but it was a good numb. I was getting a raise and only after two weeks of working as an assistant. "I know it's a lot to take in, and I probably didn't even tell you all the good details. But only because there is going to be a meeting on Monday with the CFO form New York who is going to officially offer you the job." He sat back slowly raising his glass again and smiled big. "Congratulations Logan. Most people have to work their whole life to get this kind of opportunity. You did it in two weeks. That is very impressive. So…cheers." When he started to drink his champagne I blindly followed, squeezing my eyes shut hard and downed the whole thing. I heard a small chuckle beside me and opened my eyes setting my glass on the table turning to look at James who had obviously only taken a tiny sip since he was driving. But he was smiling and he was staring at me. I swallowed the rest of the liquid hard and fast and wiped my chin. He laughed again and leaned in kissing me softly.

"Congratulations baby. I'm proud of you." I breathed out low and soft and managed a smile. My mind was still not comprehending all of it quite yet, and I couldn't decide if this was a dream or if it was real.

"And from what they told me there will be heavy travel." My head snapped to Louis fast and I was hit by a truck. That wasn't the most ideal thing to hear at this point. "Mostly to New York but sometimes overseas. I mean…that would be great for you two, especially if James had taken the job in New York." Again I snapped my head but this time to James who was staring right at Louis.

"What job?" James swallowed hard and turned to me licking his lips. "You got a job offer in New York?" He nodded slowly making me scoot a little away from him and turn towards him. "You didn't tell me? Why?"

"Because I…" He stopped and glanced around the room at the three people staring at us concerned. Louis cleared his throat fast and stood up, excusing himself and asking Kendall and Carlos if they wanted a tour of the house, which they both agreed to. They walked out hand in hand, and Carlos looked back at us giving me a sad look. I ignored him and crossed my arms over my chest looking back to James how was no doubt searching through his dumb idiotic brain to find the right words. "I got it the night you got the job with Louis. I didn't want to one, steal your thunder, and two let your dream come crashing down like that. I turned it down and we moved on. It's not a big deal." He set a hand on my leg but I shoved it off.

"Not a big deal? If it wasn't a big deal you would have said something along the lines of, oh hey, I got a job offe4r but it wasn't a good fit so I turned it down." He sighed and set his elbows on his knees looking at the coffee table in front of us. "What was it for?"

"Sportscaster for ESPN." My mouth dropped open and quickly shoved him with surprising force. "Logan take it easy. It's not a big deal! I didn't want to take the job, so I didn't!" I tried to talk but he cut me off and grabbed my hands with his. "And I didn't even tell you about it because I know how you are! You would have gotten all guilty and what not. You would have not taken this job, not have been happy, and would have convinced me in some super smart way to take the job! I didn't want to do that to you! Excuse me!" I closed my mouth fast and bowed my head down shaking it softly. "You would have not gotten this opportunity, to do what you actually love and want to do, if I had said something that night. I know you too well Logan. Don't make this a huge thing, and please don't be mad at me. I didn't do this to hurt you, or be deceitful." I looked up fast and locked eyes with him. He gave me a pleading look, to forgive him and tell him I loved him and I was just about to, but something caught my eye. Something that I probably had seen and looked at, but didn't even put two and two together until right now. I saw it over James shoulder and slowly I stood myself up. "Loges?" I let his hands go and walked around him and the table and walked to the small desk up against the wall next to the doors. Sitting on top of the desk was a sweater, and a bag. If no one knew who it belonged to like I did, they would assume it was Louis. But I knew it wasn't, because I don't think he owned a black backpack, or a black cardigan. Not these two anyway. "Logan? What's wrong?" I quickly unzipped the backpack and reached in gasping quietly. I grabbed a hold of keys and a wallet. I pulled them out and recognized the keys instantly. "What are you doing?" I felt James get right behind me, and knew he was peering over my shoulder. And when I opened the wallet after setting the keys back in the bag, I heard him whisper what the fuck seeing the driver's license. Henry's face was smiling bright up at us. I turned quick to look at James who had his mouth hanging wide open and a confused look on his face. I head soft laughter and talking coming a little closer and quickly shoved Henry's wallet in the back pocket of James black jeans and closed the backpack fast. "Why did you put that it in my pants?" I grabbed his face fast and pulled him down to me, to kiss him hard. Our eyes stayed open and I shook my head softly closing my own. We both heard the footsteps stop at the door and he immediately put his hands on my sides.

"Looks like they made up. And just in time for dinner." I pulled away slowly still holding his face and forced a fake smile. He swallowed hard and also smiled gently pulling my body into his. "Let's eat so Louis can tell you more about your job!" Carlos looked completely different, and so did Kendall. They were both smiling and holding onto each other, and it looked genuine. I glanced back up to James who only nodded and started walking us out to of the room following the other three.


	15. Chapter 15: For Me

It was a white hot burning coal in my back pocket. It was probably burning through my jeans. And while I felt I had a target on my back, it felt like everyone knew. That was nauseating. Everything sort of fell into place seeing Henry's wallet in Louis's house. Like that was the ultimate evidence pointing all the shit we've gone through, to Louis. I just really hoped Logan saw it that way. I mean he had no other choice really. It was right in front of his nose. And maybe he realized that, which is why he put the wallet in my pocket. I just don't know why he couldn't put it in his own pocket. Maybe he thought I would say something right away. Maybe he was hoping I would bring up the fact that he has a missing kids backpack in his house. And just maybe, I would. Right now at dinner.

Logan sat very close to me as soon as we sat down. He looked uneasy. He looked pretty pale as well. But he had on a fake smile and Louis and Kendall and Carlos bought it, which I found very odd. Carlos and Kendall seemed like a completely different couple. Five minutes ago I was sure Carlos was going to dump Kendall's dumb ass. Now they were sharing secrets and stealing little giggles and kisses every now and then. It was off putting. I didn't know how to handle their attitude change. And them acting like that only pissed me off eve worse, and when Louis finally sat down after bringing out a pasta dish and a salad I couldn't stop myself and opened my mouth, while standing up. "So Lou…care to explain this?" I threw the wallet onto the table in front of him making every pair of eyes fall on me. Louis slowly reached out for the wallet and opened it before looking up at me mouth open. "Where is he? What did you do to him?" Louis stood himself up looking down at my side, probably at Logan and then looked back at me shaking his head.

"James, it is not what it looks like."

"What it looks like is that you have a missing kids backpack and sweater n your house and that will not look very good to the cops." We stared at each other. It was almost like we were the only two in the house. In the world, and it wasn't the good kind. Usually it's only me and Logan. No one else matters or is there. But I finally felt like I had this guy pushed into a corner and I could finally prove myself that there was something off about him. "I don't know if you remember me walking in on you banging that kid but I don't. And I'm sure, at least 99% sure that it has something to do with this kid missing." Louis gently set the wallet down and looked down at the table swallowing hard. "Let me guess here…same story with Matthew? Kid wants to go far so you promise him the moon but when he becomes too attached or wants more, you decided to kill him off?" I felt a hand on my arm tug gently and saw Logan standing up right next to me. "What…because you couldn't get in my fiancées pants you had to take it out on this kid?"

"James you have it all wrong, I promise you." He looked back up at me groaned quietly and turned towards a flight of stairs. "Henry?" I clenched my fists down at my sides, Logan clutching onto my arm harder. What none of us were expecting, especially Logan because he gasped out loud, was Henry. He was walking down the stairs, in a pair of plain blue jeans and a white shirt. "He isn't missing, I didn't kidnap him and I didn't kill him." Henry walked out to us carefully, as if he was dodging broken glass on the ground. He looked worried and slightly afraid but when he walked right up to Louis his demeanor changed. He smiled and wrapped an arm around his waist letting Louis wrap around his shoulders. "We faked all of it, and I know that's against the law but he has good reasons for doing what he did and I only wanted to help him." I looked around the table first at Kendall and Carlos. Carlos looked a little uncomfortable, and Kendall was staring directly at me. If I didn't know any better he looked pissed off. Right at me. And then I turned to Logan who still looked uneasy, but almost like he felt better seeing the kid walking around.

"I know how this looks, and I know you all probably think I'm nuts but I did what I did because my step dad is a drunk and he beats me and my mom. I had enough, went to Louis for some advice and now were here…I guess." He looked down blushing and shook his head. "If my step dad found out I was gay or how much money I was making working for Louis he'd probably kill me and then try to get all my money I've been saving to move out. So I asked Louis if he could help me out and the best thing we came up with was me missing. No one cares anyway. SO it doesn't matter."

"What about your roommate?" Everyone turned to Logan who suddenly got embarrassed and blushed letting my arm go. "The cops said your roommate called in, that you were missing." Louis looked down at Henry and smiled softly before turning back to us.

"I had my best friend call it in. I live with my parents still but the cops didn't need to know that. Like I said my parents wouldn't care I was gone. No one would." Louis gently pulled the kid tighter into his body and kissed his head softly. I wanted to vomit but more importantly I wanted to crawl into a hole and die. I mean…the kid was fine. He was in good hands (I guess) and seemed happy. So was I wrong? About…everything?

"We planned it perfectly I guess. I "fired him" on the day he went "missing". That way it would just look like to the police he ran off without a word said. I only did it to help him out because I do care about him."

"Okay…fine. Henry is oaky and well and you helped him out. That doesn't explain why you have pictures of my fiancée, a video of him and I in his office having sex, and a video of my best friend getting his ass kicked on your computer!" My arm was grabbed again but this time Logan was trying to push me down in my seat. I gently shoved him aside and stared down Louis who sighed out and gently set Henry in the seat Louis had just been sitting in.

"Well James…I'm being blackmailed." I frowned and he walked around the table, behind Kendall and Carlos who were now both staring at me, and took the seat at the other end of the table. "Someone, I'm not going to assume, but probably Matthew, has managed to set up a camera in my office as well as Logan's. And I don't know why I got that video of Carlos being hurt but I've already sent it to the police. They told me to keep all the pictures and videos on my computer for evidence."

"Bullshit!" I was shoved rather roughly by Logan into my chair. I looked up at him and saw him giving me a sad look.

"James I'm sorry I ever made you feel awkward or uncomfortable. I've never done anything to Logan, nor would I ever do anything to Logan. For God's sake I just gave him the best job offer he could ever get!" I turned to Louis fast who shook his head and leaned back in his chair. "I'm not sure if you just don't have trust in Logan or what, but It's not my business. I do know that Logan is my employee and more importantly a friend so I do want what's best for him." I felt a tiny bomb go off in my head hearing this guy speak. What did that have to do with anything? "You and I are a lot alike James. We see someone in need of help or assistance and we do whatever it takes to help that person, no questions asked."

"I am nothing like you, you piece of shit."

"James!" I turned to Logan fast who pushed his chair back and stepped out from behind the table. "Can I speak to you in private pleas?" I got up without one glance to anyone around the table and followed Logan out. We walked into a huge spacious kitchen that smelled of the dinner that was just put out in front of us. Logan walked to a counter put his hands palm down on it and sighed out bowing his head down. "Are you out of your damn mind?" I crossed my arms over my chest as I leaned against the sink and swallowed hard. "That is my boss James. The man who is giving me an amazing job! The man who gave me an amazing job to begin with!"

"Again, not to be a prick, but the only reason he wanted you to work there was so he could have a little eye candy to look at during work!" He turned ot me fast tears already forming. "Logan if it hadn't been for that naive kid out there, it would have been you! He would have convinced you in some way to be with him! Why can't you see that!?"

"James he just told us everything you've been worried about! Henry is fine, and isn't being manipulated into being with him! He said he is being blackmailed and he had nothing to do with Carlos being hurt! Everything you wanted to know the truth about, you just found out! Why can't you believe it!?"

"Because I don't trust him Logan!" We both went quiet, my voice echoing through the huge kitchen and probably out into the rest of the house. He looked defeated, but still was holding himself up and hadn't cried yet. He just closed his eyes swallowed hard and put up his hands.

"We are not going to fight here. I'm going to tell them were leaving and hope to God I still have a job on Monday."

"Don't be the fucking marauder Logan." He stopped fast on his way to the kitchen door and turned back to me. "You know just as well as I do that guy isn't going to fire you. And you know that when you go to work on Monday this jackass is going to tell you what an awful guy I am, how you deserve better and for some reason you are going to listen to him. Is it because you trust him more than me? Have you put all your faith in another guy?"

"I don't like this James in front of me. You sound like a paranoid jackass and the more you keep talking the angrier I am going to get so just please keep your stupid big mouth shut." He turned fast and pushed out through the kitchen doors hard. I pushed off the counter and made my way out of the house. I found my coat, thankfully on the way and when I got to the front door I stopped to put my coat on. I heard footsteps behind me, but knew it was just going to be Logan and maybe if I didn't look at him we wouldn't start screaming at each other again. I grabbed the door handle and turned it, pulling the huge, heavy wood door open, but as it got further open a hand slapped onto the wood hard and pushed the door closed. I turned and frowned seeing Kendall staring at me with a blank expression on his face.

"I'm not sure why but Logan believes him and doesn't think there is anything to worry about, so why do you?" I gave him a nasty look pushing him away softly and turned back to the door. "You worried about Logan falling for a guy who doesn't scream in his face or treat him like a piece of meat, yet here you are pushing him right into his arms." I pulled the door open roughly and stepped out into the pouring down rain.

SO I was the only one who wasn't buying this guy's bullshit. I was going to end up being the bad guy because I made a scene and yelled at Logan's boss. I was the one who was going to have to deal with this myself. And Kendall was probably right. Maybe the way I was acting and thinking was just pushing Logan away. But maybe that's what Louis wanted. Maybe that was his whole plan. To get under my skin so I blew up on him and make it look like I was the jackass and he wasn't. And then again…maybe Logan was right. Maybe I was paranoid. But didn't I have good reason to be?

Logan got in the car five minutes after I did. He was crying. I felt like an idiot. He pulled his seatbelt on, lying his coat on his lap and looked out his window setting his elbow on it wiping his face not letting me see. I reached up to the key in the ignition and went to turn it but I stopped. I sat back lying my hands in my lap and looked out my own window out at Louis's house. I heard him sniffle and shift in his seat but remained pretty quiet. I wanted to apologize and admit I was wrong but the words wouldn't come out. It would taste to much like poison. And if I know Logan as well as I think I do, if I admitted I was wrong, he'd be even more upset because I just made a huge deal out of all of it. I was stuck with no idea how to get unstuck so to speak. "Can we leave please?" Hearing his heart broken voice through the tears made me feel even worse and I quickly turned the car on and pulled my seatbelt on.

I don't think he noticed we weren't going home. I didn't decide not to go home until I saw a sign for a burger place as I drove down the freeway. I was hungry but I also knew if I tried something, anything to butter Logan up, it might not be that bad. Our fight later on I mean. So I went to the drive through, ordered for both Logan and I and when we got the food I parked in the back of the parking lot and killed the engine. I finally turned to Logan who was wiping his face, still, breaking my heart, and took off my seatbelt. I purposely ordered two regular drinks and two shakes, mine a vanilla, his a strawberry. It was the first thing he grabbed. He stuck his straw in the cup and started sucking it down looking down at his lap. "Loges…" He closed his eyes and looked away setting his shake back down in the drink holder. I sat back a little and played with my own straw and looked out straight ahead. "I don't want to lose you." The rain hadn't let up since we left Louis's house and after hearing my voice, it was almost nice. It was soothing.

"You have never been in danger of that." I continued to look straight ahead even when I heard him move around. "You honestly think I would leave you for that guy? Sure he's attractive and has a lot of money but it's not what I want. I want you. I always have and I always will. But when you get like this…when you act like this…" I finally turned to him and was more than surprised to see him putting our bag of food and the drink carrier on the dash of my car. His seatbelt flew off and he turned in his seat pushing up on it. I sat back completely and watched, mesmerized as he climbed onto my lap, facing me. His body fit perfectly between mine and the steering wheel and his legs squeezed very close to mine, making me close my legs tight. His hands were on my neck and moving up to my face as he moved in close to me. Even in the dark I could tell he was crying still. I set my hand son his legs and let him kiss my lips softly. "I don't know how to handle you when you're like that. I don't want you to be so upset with something so…so miniscule it's frustrating. Because you yell at me, asking me if I have put my faith in another man, yet you don't have any faith in me. I believe in you, and I trust you. It hurts to know you don't feel the same way." My hands slipped to his back and I pulled him in closer. I could see from the light outside our car the tears running down his face, but he wasn't sobbing or crying hysterically. He was just letting silent tears run down his face. It killed me.

"Logan I do trust you. I do have faith in you."

"Please start acting like it." We locked eyes and one of my hands numbly reached up to wipe his face. He pressed his cheek into my hand and closed his eyes shaking his head softly. "We're going to get married James. We're going to give the rest of our lives to each other. I don't want that to go to waste over something so stupid, like my boss. I don't want you to go behind my back anymore and snoop on him. I don't want you and Kendall to go to the police claiming there is something going on, when their isn't. I don't want to fear I'm going to lose you because you have a jealousy problem, even though you deny it. I want you to be happy James, and it kills me to know you're not." I frowned pulling him in closer to me letting his tears fall down onto my neck. "I don't like hearing form someone else that you turned down an amazing job. One that could have made you genially happy with what you do with your life. I don't want to be the reason you hold back anymore James. I don't want to be the reason you are mad or angry, and I don't want little things to send you over the edge. I want you happy. I only want you happy and I don't know how to do that." I opened my mouth feeling like an even bigger asshole knowing the reason he was so upset was for more reasons than me blowing up at dinner. But he kept going. He wasn't going to let me talk yet. "I need you to start doing things for yourself. Not because you want to protect me, or you think you need to protect me. I want, James Diamond to come first, In James Diamond's head. I want you to live for yourself first. I want you to love yourself first, even before me. How are we supposed to love each other completely when you don't know how to love yourself." I was becoming worried. This speech was heartbreaking for not only me, but him because I think he was going to be telling me something even worse. Something that might actually destroy me. "I want…I want you to take that job in New York. I want you to go there and make yourself happy, just like you made me happy when you gave me the encouragement to take this job. I want you to make a name for yourself, so we can look back and be proud of what we've accomplished in our lives. Please James."

"Logan…I can't just leave you…I won't…I won't leave you for a job. I can find another one closer to you. Closer home."

"James please….please if you want to do anything for me, do this. Baby please." His hands moved up to my cheeks and he kissed my lips softly. "Please James…do it for us. I want you to take this job." He kissed me again, sobbing out quietly, making me wrap both my arms around his back and turn his head to the side so I could lay it on my shoulder. He cried out again and moved his hands down to my coat and tugged on it sniffling quietly. "Please James." I closed my eyes running a hand up through his hair and clenched my jaw. What the hell was I about to do?

**See Louis is a good guy! (Wink Wink) If you know me and how I write you know this story isn't going to end good at all. But it will make you, hopefully, sit on the edge of your seat and hate me all at the same time because I play with your emotions. I get a sick joy out of doing that. Sue me. I bet no one was expecting all this to happen but a writer writes what she feels and this my friends…it is exactly what I want! Please leave a review. I love you all. xoxo**


	16. Chapter 16: Idiots

The decision wasn't easy. It took a lot of convincing. I actually feel kind of bad. I don't think I forced him, but I definitely made up his mind for him. I needed to because otherwise he wouldn't do it for himself. If he goes to New York, he can do what he loves. Being on camera and talking about sports. That is his dream and who the hell am I to stand in his way, after all the years we've gone through together. He turned down the job for me. That's not something I can live with. And it's not something I want him to live with. I'm not a selfish person. And neither is James, so we both try to do what's best for the love of our lives. He wanted to protect me form Louis (even though there is absolutely no reason to) and I want him to be happy, just like I know he wants me to be. A part of me wishes it wasn't so far away. That he didn't have to go all the way across the country. But I can't change that. Just like I can't stop myself from helping him pack his bags.

Friday night was a hard night to go through. It was when I convinced him. Saturday morning however was even harder because that was when he made the call. Whoever he called, I guess his boss was more than happy and an hour after he called him telling him he'd take the job, his boss called back telling him he had a plane ticket for Sunday morning at 10. That hit me hard. It was even worse to hear that he was going to be put in a hotel until they could get him an apartment. It was like he was practically living out there, even though I was told James would be gone for two weeks straight until he could come back. He technically only worked Sundays and Mondays so he could fly back to L.A. on Tuesday morning's and fly back out to New York on Saturday. It wasn't ideal. But it had to work. I had to make it work. For James and myself.

I sat on the floor of our shared closet as he shoved the last of his clothes into his only suitcase he was taking. I started to play with my ring on my left hand as I watched his face. He looked happy but also still a little sad. I don't know when he took off his shirt, but he was shirtless with a pair of black basketball shorts only on. I know I remember him saying something about doing a small load of laundry but I'm not 100% positive. "Shit I have a lot of clothes." I smiled small down at hands and twirled then around each other. "When I'm gone, if you throw away some of these jeans or give some of these shirts away I will not be mad." I laughed quietly and closed my eyes wondering how long we have been in the closet going through his stuff to take with him. "Alight…I'll pack my carry on tomorrow morning. I'm a little hungry. I was thinking of a salad. But since it's our last dinner for two weeks I can make whatever. We could even go out if you want. Kendall and Carlos are coming over with some authentic Mexican Tequila for tonight so…" I laughed and pushed myself up slowly. I saw James start to also rise himself up but I put my hands on his shoulders and pushed him back down crawling on his lap fast. He chuckled and sat back against the wall of the closet staring up at my face.

"Well as having a salad sounds great…right now, before we have our drunk idiot friends over tonight I want you all to myself, in every way possible." I raised up an eyebrow making his cheeks go a little red and his hands go directly onto my back underneath my shirt. His fingertips danced onto my skin, immediately making me shiver and close my eyes. "There's a lot of models in New York. You gonna be persuaded?" He laughed huskily underneath me as he attached his lips to my exposed neck.

"As long as this cute little piece of ass is waiting at home for me I won't even open my eyes." I pushed harder into him opening my eyes and looking at the plain white wall behind his head. "I love my little Logie Bear."

"Don't call me that." I was suddenly in the air clutching onto James's skin as he raised me and got up on his knees. When my back touched the carpet of the closet my legs were pushed up and his hands squeezed onto the back of my thighs. I set my hands behind my head and sighed out watching him push forward and rub his groin onto mine. I sighed out, happily content and closed my eyes.

"How about I call you whatever the hell I want, punk?" My legs were let go of and they fell around James's waste. My hands were pulled out from under my head and he laced our hands together. My lips were kissed softly making me open my eyes and watch him push back up grinning to himself. "You gonna give me a night to remember?" I nodded slowly feeling myself getting hard. "You love me?" I nodded again staying completely still even when he let my hands go and moved his own hands to the top of my jeans. My button came undone and my zipper was pulled down slowly. "I already miss you…everything about you. Your skin, your scent, your smile…your beautiful brown eyes." It felt like my heart jumped out of chest and into his. I wanted, somehow, to make the time stop so I could live in this moment forever. I reached out with both hands and ran my fingers through his hair as he bent down and kissed onto my skin above my jeans and boxers, and below the bottom of my shirt. "You're sure you want me to do this?" His voice was a sad whisper that only broke my heart even more. I sat up fast pulling his head along with me. I cupped his face and tried to get my legs completely around him.

"Yes I do." He moved in fast, kissing me hard and rough putting his arms around my back. I was off the ground and he was standing, walking us out of the closet. I pulled myself up on his body, setting my hands on his shoulders. I wrapped my legs tight around his back, locking them at the ankles. He walked us to the bed, the bed that I was going to be sleeping alone in for the next two weeks and set me down, flat on my back. He untangled me from him and in just a few seconds, my jeans, boxers and shirt was off. After being undressed I moved myself up on the bed and sat up watching him take off his shorts. When he started to take off his boxers I reached over to the night stand and opened the top drawer grabbing a condom and our bottle of almost empty lube. I fell the dip on the bed and heard him crawl over to me just as I shut the drawer. Before I could turn to face him he was kissing the side of my face while one hand grabbed around my dick and started to stroke it. I groaned out loudly and slumped against the headboard of the bed closing my eyes. He moved me around until I was underneath him with my legs outside his. He bent over me and kissed my neck gently while grabbing the condom and opening it up.

Our sex is usually hard, rough and really good. Today is was slow, sensual, passionate and really, really, really good. And for the first time in a long time he wasn't the only one who topped. I don't really like topping mostly because it wares me out faster. But I made an exception tonight for James. And I didn't really go that long. He might have noticed me wearing down faster because he switched us fast and put us in one of our favorite positions. Me on his lap, him flat on his back. To me, that just seems much more personal. Especially when he sat up, holding around my back, and we locked eyes. It was the epitome of love making.

I didn't want to get up, out of bed after a straight two hours of sex. I was sore, and exhausted. But Romeo started barking and I heard a loud yell, from Kendall, telling us him and Carlos were here. I groaned when James untangled us and he got out of bed quickly pulling his shorts back on. He also grabbed a sweater and before walking out of the room he kissed my face, neck and shoulder before running out. I groaned again hearing James walk down the stairs, and Carlos yell for me to come down. When I pushed myself up out of the bed and walked to the bathroom I heard a ring from the bedroom. I groaned again, loud and walked back out to the bedroom. I saw my phone lit up on my nightstand and sat on the bed grabbing it seeing a missed call from Louis. I frowned and pulled up his number calling him back. I stood up and again walked to the bathroom turning on the light and walking to the toilet. The phone rang and rang, but he never answered. I went pee and quickly cleaned myself up before sending him a text, asking if everything was alright and if he needed anything. A huge part of me didn't want him to respond because I just wanted to stay home and spend every second with James. But I was still worried.

It was a drunken night that made me feel good. I woke up at 7, just as James was walking into the bathroom. I stayed in bed, well after getting into a pair of James sweats and one of his big sweatshirts, up until he came out of the bathroom completely dressed. His hair was wet, an still a little messed up but he looked so good. He walked right up to my side of the bed pushed me flat on my back and nuzzled his nose into my neck. I wrapped my arms tight around his neck and closed my eyes gritting my teeth. "You okay to drive?" I laughed nervously and nodded squeezing around him tighter. "Well I don't know if you remember last night but Kendall and Carlos crashed here. They were too fucked up to drive. So one of them can drive you home if you can't." I only nodded again biting my bottom lip hoping the tears I felt forming, wouldn't spill out. "You want me to make you a big hot breakfast?" I laughed again but unfortunately felt tears spill out. And so did James. "No tears babe. I'm going to be back in 14 days. That's nothing." I couldn't help the little sob that escaped my lips. James and I haven't really been apart for more than a few hours at a time. Now we were going to be miles apart. I couldn't believe I was about to let all this happen, without being able to stop it. "Come on…you were so happy to get me to take this job. If you do this right now I'm not going." I sobbed a little louder and clutched onto his shirt in the back.

"No…no…I'm fine. I'm just…it's going to be hard to see you leave. I'll be okay. I promise, and you're still going." He laughed quietly and kissed my ear not caring my tears were in the way of his kisses. "We need to get you to the airport. Security ya know."

"Yeah I know. Super excited about that." He pushed off me and started to get off the bed but I was feeling extra clingy this morning. I got up fast wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself up on his back. I was literally on him like a monkey on his mother's back. He only laughed wrapping his arms under my knees and standing up. I pushed the side of my face into the side of his and let him give me a piggy back ride to the closet where he grabbed his suitcase, and his carryon bag, I don't know when he packed. He held me up tight while carrying his bags, all the way down the stairs. I was too into James and too worried about the few hours I had left with him to even think twice about the bundle of blankets and bodies on the floor of our living room. It wasn't until James threw his bag son the ground, rather loudly making both bodies shoot up. I couldn't look away and I actually think time froze. Both Kendall and Carlos were nude. Completely. And neither one of them went to cover themselves sup. And I couldn't stop staring at their dicks. Kendall was…packing in every sense of the word. And he wasn't even hard. Carlos was okay but it was Kendall…I was kind of mesmerized by his cock. "Cover your dicks!" James turned us fast so we weren't looking at them. My cheeks were beat red and I pushed my face into his shoulder. "God…I can't believe I'm going to be leaving you alone for 14 days with these idiots."


	17. Chapter 17: Lightweight

"_Give me a call when you get out of your meeting. Knock em dead baby! I am so super proud of you! You will never believe what I already bought for you! Love you! –James" _I smiled down at my phone and bit my bottom lip resisting the urge to pick up my office phone and call him already. But I literally had to go into a meeting that would map out the rest of my future in less than two minutes. I was a nervous wreck but seeing James text made me feel 1,000 times better. SO much better I stood up from my desk straightened my tie, brushed down the hair on my head and slipped my phone into my suit pant pocket. I grabbed my suitcase off the top of my desk and walked to my open door smiling at the back of Carlos's head as he typed rather quickly on his computer. I gently smacked the back of his head making him groan but not look away from the screen.

"Don't you have a meeting to go to?" I smiled and walked to the front of the counter leaning on it, looking down at his very clean and organized desk.

"I need to wait for Louis. Whatcha doin?" He sighed out and looked up at me stopping his typing. I laughed, more so my nerves could get out and he looked back to his computer. "I already discussed it with Kendall and he can't go because he has practice tomorrow, but you wanna go out and celebrate with me tonight? Get some drinks at a bar maybe?"

"Hell yeah. Sounds like fun. You and I haven't done a lot of hanging out together in a long time. It will be a blast buddy." I grinned and stood up straight seeing Louis's office door opening. Three men, all in business suites came walking out. Two had smiles on their faces, while the third was on his phone, looking stern. I cleared my throat and started to walk towards them slowly putting on my best serious, professional face. Louis then walked out, also smiling and walked right up to me clearing his throat softly.

"Gentlemen I'd like you to meet Logan Mitchell the smartest guy to walk through this office building." I blushed hard but extended my hand letting the two not on the phone shake my hand. "Logan this is Bradley Swanson and Jeffrey Newmark. They are the current foreign directors on the East Coast who are here to give you all your paperwork, a few solid tips and the keys to your apartment in New York." My mouth fell open as I was turned and pushed behind the two men by Louis.

"What did you just say? My own apartment? In New York? Louis…I live in L.A. My home is here…I can't…" He stopped us fast and smiled down at me shaking his head.

"Loges…this is a great opportunity. Take everything from it. When you're done with the meeting come see me in my office. We got to work on getting two new assistants. One for you and me." He patted my shoulder gently, while pushing me after the two men holding briefcases and talking quietly. I felt nausea and so nervous but I followed anyway, keeping my head held high. I glanced over my shoulder seeing Carlos now standing next to Louis, who were both smiling at me. Carlos gave me a goofy grin and two thumbs up while Louis only smiled and put his hands in front pockets of his pants. He had a very genuinely proud smile on his face. It made my confidence boost and my nerves sort of fade away. I turned back to the two men in front of me and followed with a slight smile on my face.

It's funny how easy and fast time goes by when you are honestly happy. When you feel like what you're doing in that current moment, is the best and nothing can break you down. I was actually surprised that two hours flew by and in those two hours I became a completely different person. It was actually amazing to me that, not just three weeks ago I was nervous about an assistant job, to now, where I am the Foreign director of one of the biggest financial companies on the west coast. It was literally life changing. Minus the fact that instead of working for 55,000 a year, I am now jumped up to 75,000. And to be completely honest, the best part for me, was that these two men, Jimmy and Frank talked to me like I was an equal. They didn't ask me to get them a cup of coffee. They didn't ask me where I bought my shoes. They treated me like a guy who knew what he was doing and they talked to me as if I already cured cancer or ended world hunger. They let me talk about my ideas and my concerns about the company. They let me talk for myself, not on anyone else's behalf. It was empowering. It was also causing a huge complication in my heart because while I turned down the apartment in New York, saying I might already have one, (both men really exciting I'm dating a sportscaster), James was constantly running through the back of my head. And while he went through my head, another thought crept inside. Independence. Getting this new job, with all these new perks made me feel like maybe I didn't need to be so focused on my fiancée taking a job in New York. And what scared me is that I've always been dependent on James. He's my big over protective teddy bear. And now that I felt like I didn't need him…I felt like a complete jackass. My guilt was getting the best of me.

I walked out of the meeting room thanking Jimmy and Frank one last time making sure they had my cell phone and home phone number. When I walked them to the escalator smiling still and waving, until the doors closed. I dropped my hand fast going directly to my pocket and grabbed my phone. I kept my head down as I unlocked my screen, and pulled up James's number. I walked right into my office, went right behind my desk sitting down hard. Just as I let my thumb hover over the call button for James something on my desk caught my attention. I looked up quick but stood up even faster letting my briefcase, and jacket crash to the floor. There was a bouquet of beautiful yellow lilies sitting perfectly in a back vase. The scent automatically filled my nostrils and my head spun. This had James written all over it.. One, he knew my favorite flower was a yellow lily. And two he knew I loved to have every think look ordered. So if I got flowers, or anything really, they had to match our kitchen flow as I called it. Either stainless steel, dark blue or black. So the black vase was a super dead give a way. I reached out quick for the note car attached to the flowers and opened it up, smile fading. They were too me, but from Louis. Not James. I frowned hating that I got worked up for an inevitable let down. James wasn't really romantic. He got by just fine by his looks but when he wanted to be, he could be the sweetest most irresistible romantic piece of ass on the plant. Today was not that day apparently.

I left my phone and my worries in my office as I carried the lilies out of my office and knocked on Louis's door softly. I heard his chair creak and not two seconds later his door pulled open. He smiled instantly seeing the flowers in my hand and I leaned against his door frame blushing. "You didn't have to get me flowers."

"Oh but I did. See…I've noticed your new office isn't all that bright. It's actually kind of boring. So I think you should have some color. Something fresh." He gave me a winning pearly white smile that made me laugh. It was a nervous laugh. That was weird. I only nervous laughed when I flirted. "You like them? I didn't really know what color, or what type to get, but I've seen you wear a lot of yellowish ties, and noticed that the air freshener you keep in your office is lilies so I guessed. How'd I do?" I glanced up at his face, smiling small before blushing again and nodding.

"Perfect. Lilies are my favorite." He nodded and chuckled clapping his and then rubbing them.

"Well I'm ordering pizza for Lunch today. Any favorite toppings?" He walked to his desk and I followed still holding the vase.

"I'm a cheese kind of guy…uhm Louis…who was that other guy here? I mean…the one who was on the phone?" He picked up his office phone and chuckled.

"My business partner. We started the company together. He handles all of the nitty gritty detail work of this joint, while I'm more concerned with customer satisfaction." I nodded slowly and sighed sticking my nose into the lilies inhaling deeply. I looked up, very aware I was being watched and blushed turning out of the room. "After lunch we'll put out an ad for two assistants. I want yours to be fluent in at least two of the languages you are, so let's keep that in mind." I only nodded giving him a thumbs up and walked out of his office. Back to mine. I stopped in the door way however seeing Kendall sitting on my couch in my office.

"He let himself in! Barely gave me a kiss." I smirked hearing Carlos's voice and walked to my desk. "Just so you know…" I turned hearing Carlos closer and set down my flowers. "He doesn't like the idea of the tow of us tearing this town apart tonight but he hasn't won the argument. Stay strong Loges." I couldn't help the smile widen as he turned grabbing the door knob and pulling the door closed, tight. I sat down behind my desk and glared at Kendall as he stood up and walked towards me.

"I don't need to hear that I don't know how to take care of myself. I don't need to hear a bullshit speech that I need to watch how much I'm drinking, so spare your breath."

"Actually…" He walked all the way behind my desk and sat on the edge, right next to me. He reached into the front pocket of his black leather jacket and pulled it out quickly raising a pill bottle. I stood up, curiosity peaked and took it from him. I scanned over the label seeing his name and the name of a certain drug, I didn't know. "This bottle had a 60 day supply, with 12 days already taken. These pills keep my heart rate down and my blood pressure under control. This bottle is now empty." I looked up quick and saw how…scared he looked. "I cannot even begin to explain to you why it's empty. I know I didn't empty it. I know I didn't take all the pills. And I sure as hell know I'm not crazy and I have been following the directions right." He took the bottle back form me and shoved it back in his jacket pocket. "I already talked to my doctor who said I could get a refill but sounded worried, like maybe he thought I was ODing on them or something which seems stupid to me…but I'm, myself, am worried. If it wasn't me who emptied this bottle, and no one else knows about this bottle except Carlos…" He stopped and we locked eyes if only for a second before he looked down, closing his eyes. "Who did empty it?"

"You cannot stand here and tell me you think Carlos had something to do with this." For some reason, I was whispering. That made Kendall look up and blink at me, giving me a glossy look. It was that look, a mix of sadness, fear and pain that made me feel bad. "Do you want me to talk to him tonight?"

"If I did he'd yell at me and it would cause another fight." I frowned crossing my arms over my chest and he chuckled. "He's not happy with em still Loges. About everything that's happened with Louis and whatnot. So I'm in the dog house. I thought I had a break through when we banged on your living room floor but he's still pissed and half the reason is because he wants me to quit hockey because of my heart condition. It worries him I guess. So if you could…yeah talk to him for me." I could only nod feeling a heavy rain cloud encompass my heart. "And James really knows how to sweep you off your feet. Flowers and shit…fucking suck up." Kendall pushed off my desk and turned to the door. "I'll come by after Carlos gets home, to pick you up to drive you guys to the bar." He grabbed the door knob and pulled it open walking out into the main office. I followed quick wanting to tell him James didn't send the flowers but stopped fast, seeing Kendall bend over pulling Carlos's face away from his computer screen to kiss him. Carlos melted instantly but it was short lived. Kendall let him go and walked to the elevators fast. Carlos looked back at me, a little out of breath, a smile on his face. How in the world was I going to talk to him about this?

Questioning my best friend on whether he was purposely taking his boyfriends heart pills wasn't going to be easy. It made me less focused the rest of the day and almost made me make a call to James. I was supposed to call James because he asked, but I didn't want to bring up that my boss got me flowers after getting a great job and he didn' I decided to not even go down that road. But as the day progressed, I became more worried about how to deal with the situation. I know just as well as anyone that Carlos gets a little loosened up when he drinks so maybe I just had to put a few shots in front of him to get him to talk. Maybe his guilt, much like mine I was feeling earlier would get the best of him and he'd tell em everything, if there was anythgin to tell. My drive hoem was even worse, seeing how close the tiem was getting to when iwould hav eto confront Carlos. And just as my luck would have it, as soon as I pulled into the driveway of our house, James called. I regreatfulyl answered it as I got out and wlaked to the front door. "Hello?"

"Hey babe." Hey babe? That's all he's got for me? "How was your day?"

"Fine." I struggled with the lock for a minute before pushing it open and walking in, slamming the door hard making Romeo bark and jump off the couch charging towards me.

"Are you alright?" I closed my eyes letting my briefcase drop to the floor hard and pinched the bridge of my nose feeling a headache already forming.

"I'm fine James. Just trying to get ready to go out."

"Out?"

"Yes out, as in Carlos and I are going to grab some dinner and go drink at a bar. Is that alright with you?" There was a very shocked silence on the other end making me feel bad, but not enough to not walk to the stairs and start undoing my tie. Before he could get a word in, a lot of words I only said out of anger, came pouring out. "How is it New York? Fabulous and amazing with your amazing apartment and new life? Do people you barely know give you flowers, your favorite flowers in your favorite color, just because their proud of you? Have you met a rich good looking guy I need to be worried about getting in your pants because your just a pretty face?" I threw my tie, now a ball of fabric to the floor of my bedroom making Romeo chase after it and start chewing on it. I kicked off my shoes towards the closet and swallowed hard. "I'll call you later. I need to get dressed."

"Logan what the hell is wrong? What the hell did I do?! Did you not like my flowers?!"

"Goodnight James!" I hung up fast throwing the phone on the bed and wiped my face under my eyes walking to my closet. I found tonight to be the most perfect night to get wasted with my best friend, given my current life problems.

Kendall and Carlos came to pick me up about 15 minutes after I talked to James. In that time, he called me 50 more times leaving a voicemail every time. It was so ridiculous, when I walked out the front door locking it, making sure Kendall had Romeo's food and favorite blanket because he was dog sitting, I didn't even care my phone wasn't in my pocket. The drive was quiet, with me in the back seat trying to calm down Romeo, who was really excited to be in the car. I think Kendall and Carlos could tell I was pissed but o one said anything. I hated seeing their hands laced together resting on Kendall's leg and hated even more to see Kendall kiss Carlos as he stopped on the side of the road by the gay bar we were going to. I chose the bar for a couple reasons I wasn't proud about. I literally had to pull Carlos away from the car just to stop the gross make out fest. We walked inside, arms linked and made our way to the bar in a hurry. As soon as I got up to it I order a shot of tequila and a red bull and vodka, getting nothing for Carlos. "Okay…I thought we were going to get some food first, and you want to talk about why James called us asking why you were pissed?" I sat on the stool and shook my head breathing out hard.

"No. Not tonight Carlos. Tonight I want to get wasted with my best friend and make horrible decisions." I saw his mouth fall open as the bartender set the shot of tequila and cup of the bitter vodka and energy drink.

"What do you mean? Are you planning on cheating on James? Logan just talk to me…maybe I can help!" He grabbed my arm but I picked up my shot glass and downed it all squeezing my eyes shut hard. I turned going down and made me grab my cup of red bull. I chased it fast drinking all of it down and slapped the red cup on the bar top. "Logan seriously, you are worrying me."

"Yeah like your one to talk. Taking Kendall's heart medicine. Really fucking shitty asshole." I slid off my stool and saw down the bar a really good looking guy…beach blade hair, killer blue eyes and tan delicious skin staring at us, smiling small. I smiled back and walked around Carlos's still but didn't get a step farther. His hand was on my arm and he got in front of me looking confused.

"I didn't take his medicine. Why the hell would I do that?!"

"You tell me…now let me go, or come have a good time with me." I gently pushed him to the side and walked down the length of the bar bumping into some guys along the way. I stopped in front of Blondie and gave my best flirty smile. "Hey…you wanna dance?"

"Sure." He got off the stool and slipped an arm around my waste walking me to the small, already dance floor. I glanced over my shoulder, spotting Carlos and groaned on the inside seeing him on his phone. I clearly saw him mouth Kendall's name and started to hate him. But I was turned away fast and forced to face the guy now gripping onto my hips. He was gorgeous, no doubt about that, but as he started to bounce us to the music, it hit me like a ton of bricks. He wasn't James and I was an idiot. But the tequila and that Vodka was doing a great job, already (because I'm a lightweight) and I could have cared less who was holding me and grinding his body onto mine.

**So…hey. How you liking this story? Review if you please. It's going to just get juicier every chapter so buckle up. I had an idea thrown into my face by ,y spirit animal, DeniseDEMD when she reviewed saying is something gonna happen between Logan and Mr. Packing? I don't know how you do it, but you are my inspiration. You gave me such an evil plan, I kind of feel bad for writing and thinking about it. SO again…buckle up. **


	18. Chapter 18: He's A Diamond

The silence was absolutely killing me. I didn't know what to do, or what to say. Two of my best friends on the phone, not saying a word, knowing what the other is thinking. It's torturous. I can't help but to think if it hadn't had been for me and Carlos they wouldn't even be on the phone with each other. If Logan had done something so bad James couldn't even talk to him, not only would I have to watch them end it, I would be stuck right dab in the middle. I would eventually have to choose between the two of them and that would probably hurt me more than seeing them throw away their relationship. "Okay…I'll talk to you tomorrow." I looked up quick and watched Logan walk out of his kitchen his phone out in his hand. He was crying, eyes red and face puffy. He gently nudged the phone into my shoulder and I took it swallowing hard, still watching him. He sat down at the kitchen table with me putting his elbows on it and setting his head in his hands. I gently reached out, gripped his shoulder and squeezed softly. I set the phone to my ear and cleared my throat.

"Hello?"

"I don't even know what to think or say, and I'm not sure if I believe him." I swallowed hard again and looked down at my lap. "He is mad at me for one, leaving, which I'm not going to get pissed off about because he asked me to leave, and two, apparently I didn't send him 120 dollar flowers in a glass vase. No obviously that was fucking Louis, but then if that's true this receipt I have in my fucking hand was a delusion. Is it fucking obvious now what the fuck Louis is doing?" I heard a small sob come from my best friend sitting right next to me making me look up and scoot closer to him, pulling him into my chest. He laid his head on my chest and wrapped around my torso sobbing again. "I'm…I'll call you in the morning. I'm not in a really good place right now, in my head and I just need to calm the fuck down." The dial tone was seconds later making me sigh out and gently set Logan's phone on the table in front of us. I softly wrapped both arms around him and set my chin on his head looking out at the kitchen. Carlos was leaning against the kitchen counter staring at me not looking happy at all. He hasn't said two words to me since he called, panicked, thinking Logan was about to cheat on James and that worried me. I gently rubbed Logan's back and pushed him up.

"Why don't you go take a shower or something. When your coffee's done, I'll bring it up." He wiped his eyes nodding and pushed off his seat keeping one hand on my shoulder. As he walked away he dragged his hand down my arm, while still wiping off his face. I looked back out at the kitchen fast to see Carlos staring down Logan, before turning back to the counter where the coffee pot was. I got up and made my way quietly into the kitchen. I waited, very patiently for the bedroom door to shut upstairs, just because I didn't think Logan wanted to hear us argue, if that's what this came down to. "Babe…"

"Why did Logan ask me if I had taken your pills?" I gritted my teeth and leaned back against the sink almost wishing I hadn't told Logan. "It's funny to me Kendall because it was almost like he was accusing me of taking your heart medication. Which first of all that is insulting. If there is anyone in this world who wants you to take those pills and get the right treatment, it's me. So the fact that he asked me baffles me. And then to go on, I have to wonder why or how he even know your pills were gone." He turned fast crossing his arms over his chest staring me down. "Did someone tell Logan to interrogate your boyfriend on whether he took your stupid fucking pills?!"

"Carlos they were all gone!"

"So automatically I took them?! You're a real piece of fucking work Kendall! How could you think I would do that? Why in the world would I fucking take them?"

"Well if I recall correctly someone told me after we saw the doctors that you didn't want me playing anymore and that you hoped this would be good enough reason for me to quit!" His Arms fell down away from his body and his face shifted from anger, straight to sadness. "All I am worried about is if you didn't take them, I didn't take them, who the fuck did?"

"What, precious Logan isn't a suspect in you manhunt?" He pushed off the counter and tried to walk out of the kitchen but I grabbed his arm and stopped him. Well tried. He shoved me, a lot harder then I was expecting and stared me down as I held myself up on the sink. "Don't touch me, and don't come near me right now. Why don't you go be Logan's hero and tell him everything's going to be okay? And why don't you go ahead and talk to him some more about what a bad guy I am, behind my back? And seriously Kendall…don't come home." He turned fast grabbing my car keys from the kitchen counter and walked away fast. When I heard the front door open and close my head snapped back into reality and I chased after him. I got right to the end of the walkway as he backed out of the driveway and sped off not even stopping to look at me. That hurt. Actually it really fucking killed me. But it was my own fault. I pushed and I shoved and I acted like an idiot and sounded like a jackass. It is only my fault he's gone.

After making both Logan and myself a strong cup of coffee I locked up his house, and made my way upstairs slowly. It was a struggle to get his bedroom door open, but I got it and left it wide open as I walked to the master bathroom. The door was opened a crack and through the crack I could see Logan sitting in the middle of the fairly large tub with his head between his knees. He was completely wet with some bubbles slowly running down his back and from his wet hair. I set the coffee cups on the bathroom sink and gently pushed the door open. He didn't look up or really move. He just quietly sniffled and softly shook. I gently sat myself down against the wall on the opposite side of the tub. I also pulled my legs up to my chest and hugged around them staring at Logan's bare, wet back. I remember a very specific time when we were in this situation…except it was reversed. And I wasn't upset over a relationship. It was sophomore year, and my parents had just divorced. Well not really divorced, because my dad just up and left. I was only 15, and was sure it was my fault. So I was convinced the only way to fix it would be if I took my own life. Looking back, that doesn't make since, but again, I was only 15. But I never did. I never even put the razor to my wrists because Logan walked in. I hadn't been going to school, talking to my friends and Logan finally had enough. He stormed in saying my mom just let him in hoping he could talk some sense into me. We sat for two hours, not saying one word. I think it was the first time Logan had ever seen me, seriously cry. He later told me, the big giant speech he was going to give me about moving on and being there for my mom and baby sister, was lost as soon as he saw me crying. And after two hours of silence, just the little comfort I got form his company, I got out of the tub and sat next to him on the floor with a towel wrapped around me. He let me lay my head on his shoulder and he held my hand. He then told me it's okay to be sad, and it's okay to cry. He said if I ever needed a friend, he'd always be there. And then the strangest thing happened, that neither of us have talked about to this day. I looked up at him, we locked eyes, and we…kissed. It wasn't hard or deep or super passionate. It was just a kiss. And it wasn't our only one. When we pulled away, something made me open my mouth and tell him I was thinking of killing myself. He looked destroyed. He grabbed my face and smashed our lips together again. It was one of the most magical and heartwarming things I had ever experienced.

And now here we were again. Except he needed a friend and I could barely make out two words because I was really worried about my current relationship with Carlos. But Carlos walked away, didn't give me a chance to make up for all the dumb things I said. And Logan didn't have anyone here for him, like James, so I had to stay. I had to be here for Logan. And when he lifted his head and glanced over at me wiping his face he smiled small. "Can I have my coffee?" I smiled back and got up, grabbing both cups fast. I sat down on the toilet this time handing him his and sipped from mine as he sipped from his. For a minute the slurping was all that was heard. For some reason I couldn't stop staring at him. He had bubbles covering every square inch of his skin underneath the water so I couldn't see anything private but his chest and some of his stomach was showing and for a second I started to imagine running my hands over his wet body. But the thought left my head as he set his cup next to the tub and gently laid himself back rubbing his eyes. "I just almost ruined the best relationship I have ever had, all because of some stupid flowers."

"That James sent." He set his hands back in the water and glared at me. I smiled and leaned back shrugging making him groan and roll his eyes. "Logan James knows you. He knows you like those smelly flowers that make my allergies go nuts, and he knows you like surprises like that. I know this isn't something you want to hear, but is it possible Louis just took the flowers and said they were from him?" He gave me a scary look but I wasn't afraid. "You love James, James loves you. But if you don't talk to him about shit he starts to doubt it. So why haven't you talked to him about you not wanting him to go, and why didn't you listen to him tonight?"

"The flowers were from Louis."

"Bullshit." He turned to me fast and I leaned forward resting on my knees. "If you gather anything form tonight…Logan…if you learn anything from this experience please let it be that lying and hiding things from a man you love, can be dangerous. Carlos called me out about my pills. He's pissed and he's hurt that I one, didn't talk to him first, two asked you to do it, and three that I don't trust him enough to know he would never do something to me. I have fucked up and the only way this can be right again, is if by some miracle when I get home, he's still there, and will give me a chance to explain or just apologize. I do not want that to happen to you and James. Nothing you have done, is enough for that man to walk away from you." I gently slid off the toilet setting my coffee next to his. I rested on my knees and leaned against the tub staring at him. He was baling again, but not making a noise. "Do not ever let your relationship come to that. Don't ever let him walk away without saying I love you. And don't you ever take a minute with him for granted. There is a reason that ring is on your finger. You love him. And you didn't want to cheat on him tonight. I'm going to be completely honestly with you Logan. I think the reason you thought of cheating is because somehow Louis got in your head, and you very well might not even know it. Maybe the flowers was the final push. Maybe you honestly think that guy is just nice with a ton of cash. And maybe you're blind to the power he's giving you." He sat himself back up putting his head in his hands and sobbed out. He was shaking and he was practically screaming at the top of his lungs. I set a hand on his shoulder and shook my head. "There will always be one thing Louis cannot give you, that James can." He looked up, straight ahead at the tub wall not turning to me. He bit his bottom lip and continued to shake. "James loves you form the very deepest pit of his heart. You could rip his hear out of his chest and step on it, but he will always come back for you. You are forever eternally his because that's what love is. That is something Louise can never give you. He could never treat you the way James does. And you need to wake up and realize that. Fast." He turned to me wiping his eyes and nodded.

"Okay. You're absolutely right. But I need to be sure." I frowned and sat back on my feet grabbing my mug. "I need to go to the office. I need to see for myself."

"What the hell are you talking about? You need to call James and…"

"No Kendall. I need to see the Inform." I frowned still while drinking my coffee and he started to push himself up. I looked away fast and waited until I saw his feet on the ground and a towel get wrapped around him. I glanced up carefully and got up fast seeing him walk out. "I need to look at the delivery form. In the office, every package we send out, and receive, whoever gets the package has to sign off on it.. They also have to fill out a form putting who and where it came from. So if those flowers did come from James…" He stopped by his closet and just dropped the towel. My jaw was also dropped. I couldn't look away. I had never, ever seen Logan naked. Mostly because he's always been with James, and then I got Carlos and…I looked away fast hating myself letting my cheeks blush. "I need to be 100% sure. I and want you to come with me. For safety ya know."

I don't know how he convinced me but it only hit me when we were driving away from his house. He had me drive, probably because he didn't have his right head on. We didn't say a word, the engine and the keys in his hands the only noise in the car. I wanted to let Carlos know where we were going, and what we were doing. But I couldn't. I also wanted to let James know. But maybe (hopefully) Logan had a plan for that situation. "Try not to look up at the security cameras as we walk up. It won't be weird if I'm here, but you aren't an employee. Trust me. Put your hood on and look down." I gripped the wheel and nodded as I made my way up to his parking spot on the top floor of the garage. I didn't want to do this. I hated that my body was forcing me out of the car and following after Logan. He pushed the button for the elevator and looked up at me. He smiled and gently reached up pulling my hood on. "You look pale. Maybe even worried." I frowned and gently pushed him into the elevator getting in behind fast. "Okay the form will be on Carlos's desk. If it's not. It will be in Louis's office. But were checking Carlos's first. I mean every square inch. Oh and please turn your phone off. I'm serious. If anyone is here, were fucked." I groaned pulling out my phone and shut it off at the same time Logan shut his off.

"You break into here, often?"

"No but I've had to come back a couple nights. The janitor scared me half to death and told me no one was allowed in our office in particular at night. SO I never came back and if I did, I was very careful." There was a loud ding signaling our arrival making em jump. I had to run to catch up to Logan who was already behind Carlos's cute little small organize desk. When I got behind Logan I could see a picture of Carlos and I from our vacation in Mexico. He looked so cute and happy, everything I was doing was wanting me to go home and beg for his forgiveness. "Kendall…a little help." I was smacked lightly on my stomach making me bend quick and pull open the top drawer. It was literally all markers, pens and pencils. I shut the drawer quick and pulled open the next. This one was a neatly organized row of yellow folders. "No it won't be there. Those are employee forms. Come on, they have to be in Louis's office." I was pulled up gently and barely had enough time to close the drawer. I caught up to Logan who was feet away from the door.

"How are you going to get it? I thought he locked up?" Logan raised his keys but quickly put them back down sliding one into the keyhole of the door. It locked open and he stepped in making me follow fast and I made sure to shut the door. "Where do we look?"

"His desk, or that filing cabinet. Look at his desk, will ya?" I rushed over to it fast and pulled open the middle drawer in the middle pushing his chair away. "You're looking for a white form with about 30 rows and two columns with Carlos's messy handwriting." I smirked knowing Carlos's handwriting has been awful since first grade. As I rifled through the desk, seconds after Logan spoke, I heard something…working. I looked up fast and tensed up realizing it was the elevator. "I got it!" I shut the drawer fast, turned to Logan and grabbed his upper arm. His smile fell and both of us heard the ding of the elevator. I rushed us to the office door locking it tight. I then took Logan to the huge closet looking section in the back of Louis's office and pulled the door open. I lightly shoved Logan inside and stepped in closing the door fast. I pushed us into the back as quick as I could without making too much noise and stood tall in front of Logan. He opened his mouth but I shook my head and covered it quick. He tensed up and with his free hand, not holding the paper he gripped the back of my grey sweater. I leaned in softly resting my forehead don his and closed my eyes. I could hear muffle talking, of two people and then, of course Louis's door being unlocked. It creaked open and what sounded like two pairs of footsteps walked in.

"…All I'm saying is this is taking longer than you said and I'm getting impatient." That voice…made me open my eyes and turn my head slightly. It was so familiar.

"What do you want me to do Henry? I can't fire him because the company actually thinks the guy could do some good for us, which I agree, and I can't just up and…like…kidnap him. He's got too many people looking out for him. Unlike your poor unfortunate soul." That voice was definitely Louis. Logan pulled me into him tight, being quiet and careful still.

"Ha, ha. I just hate how obsessive your being. And how paranoid you are. Like seriously…were in your office looking for a piece of paper that Logan may or may not ever see. Freak much?"

"Hey keep that sweet little ass of your quiet or you're going to get punished."

"Oh boo hoo." I tensed up even more hearing what I assumed to be a body getting set on Louis's desk. "I'm sorry…I like my man to be for myself. It seems like you love him more than me. I mean what's so great about him? He's short and a know it all. He's actually annoying."

"Hey…don't' be like that. You will always be my play thing 1. Logan is just special to me because…he's so difficult to…acquire. He's a diamond."

"Yeah? What am I?" I closed my eyes feeling tears pouring out of Logan's eyes onto my hand still gripping onto his mouth.

"You my love, are my sex kitten. And what am I to you?"

"You're my daddy." I for some reason pushed into Logan harder who was digging himself into my body. "Can we go home now? I'm hungry."

"Yeah…I think I did shred it. Thank God. Come on my little bitch bottom."

"Don't call me that punk!" I heard a sharp slap to, probably Henrys' ass, making me slightly jump. I heard the door shut and get locked, but waited still, holding around Logan who was shaking. I heard the voices still, and waited even more until the elevator dinged open and close. I waited still for a solid minute or so until there was no sound except Logan's heavy breathing. I let him go, but that only made him get closer. He wrapped around me tight, making it rather difficult for me to walk us out of the closet with the few suit jackets hanging and the different pairs of shoes on the floor. I did get us out however and as soon as we were out Logan pulled away and glanced down at the paper crying. He shook it a little before turning it and raising it in my face.

"Look at today's date." I took the paper form him softly and looked towards the bottom. It wasn't in Carlos's handwriting, which made it easier to read. It was a bouquet of flowers sent from…I looked up at Logan who was staring at me wide eyed. "What…what do you think he was talking about? What do you think he's going to do?" I gently folded the paper and shoved it in my back pocket before grabbing his face and pulling him towards me.

"Logan. He isn't going to do anything to you. I won't let it, and as soon as I tell James, he won't let anything happen, either." He closed his eyes and shook his head crying louder. I was suddenly reminder of the time when were 15 and he kissed me and how much better it made me. I looked at his face, and moved to his lips swallowing hard. I leaned in gently and pushed our lips together. He stopped making any noise and put his hands on mine. Like the first time we kissed, neither of us made a move to make it something more. At first. But then he switched it up and pushed hard into me and nipped at my bottom lip. In complete shock, I opened my mouth and let his tongue invade my mouth, which only Carlos, in a long time, has done. And the most unusual part for me, is how fast I was to kiss back. I even let one of my arms drop behind his back and hold him up, cradling him if you will, while I kissed him. I only ever, ever did that to Carlos. Something was happening to the both of us and we didn't even care enough to stop it. We both know how wrong it is, kissing someone who isn't our boyfriend or fiancée, but it wasn't enough to get us to stop. But I had to. I knew my relationship with Carlos was fucked but that didn't mean his with James had to be, as well. I gently pulled away turning and wiping my mouth. I set my hand son my hips and looked at the ground closing my eyes. "I'm so sorry…I shouldn't have…"

"I kissed you back." I swallowed hard opening my eyes and lifting my head. "I'm in love with James. I love him and I want to be with him. But why does that mean I can't…"

"Logan you're engaged. To my best friend. And were friends. That's all." I turned slowly and felt like the world around me, was burning to the ground. He looked destroyed. I moved out to him grabbing a hold of the back of his neck and pulled him into me. I hugged him tight and set my chin on his head sighing out. "James is going to fucking murder me."

"No he's not because were not telling anyone. It was a stupid kiss that meant nothing. You were just being a friend, and you did calm me down. If no one knows, no one gets hurt, right?"

"You think we can live with that?" He pulled away from me gently and smiled reaching up to cup my cheek gently.

"We have to. Because I have to call James, ask him to come home and help me deal with my lunatic boss. And you have to go home and make things right with Carlos. It's what needs to happen. It's what we need to do. Because you belong with Carlos and I belong with James." He got up on his tip toes to kiss my left cheek gently before turning and unlocking Louis's door. "I know how much James hates hearing he was right so this will be tortuous." He glanced back at me motioning me to get out of the office and I did. "For me anyway…"


	19. Chapter 19: Lesson Learned

I consider myself lucky. I have an incredible job that I am going to love doing for the rest of my life. And that incredible job, is letting me leave my work…leave the town I have to be in, to work, just to come home and deal with my personal life. They didn't care how long I was going to be gone. They didn't need to know the details. They just bought the plane ticket and reassured me, when I came back, they'd have an apartment set up for me. For me, in my head, that gesture by my work, has made my final decision very simple. When I get to L.A. I'm packing up everything that's important to me, including Logan, and were removing to New York. Full time, to start over completely. I don't care what he says or wants at this point. If our relationship, and our love, is important, he'll leave with me. And if not…we'll I just prefer not to think about that scenario.

I got on the first flight Tuesday morning, after talking to my boss. The best thing about that, was that I wasn't going to be getting on TV anytime soon. I guess I'm more qualified to be an actual journalist so they were going to send me off to different games, different schools to interview players, talk to coaches, which I was excited for. But it's not important. Not when I know Logan isn't okay, and that Logan is having troubles. Getting the second call from Logan on Monday night that he wanted me home and he didn't know what to do, scared me. Of course, Kendall came on and explained he was okay, for now, and that he'd explain everything when I got home, but I still felt like maybe if I hadn't left, whatever happened, or almost happened, wouldn't have happened. I can almost forget about how he almost cheated. Hell I can forget about the stupid fucking flowers. But I will not be able to forget all the bullshit and stress his boss has put him and I through. He won't get away with It, and if it's not me taking care of it, it will be the cops. Either way is fine with me.

I took a cab from the airport to my house. It was almost three in the afternoon, and I didn't know if Logan had gone into work or not, but I assumed not because of how upset he was last night when he called, he wouldn't go into work. And seeing his car next to mine still in the driveway made me feel a lot better. I paid the cabbie and walked up the walkway fast, noticing Kendall's car wasn't here. Hopefully it was just Logan and we could actually sit down and talk about everything. And hopefully he didn't start out by telling me what happened that was so bad last night. Because if that was the first topic, I'd be in my truck, and on my way to kill Louis. And that thought was actually appealing to me, because I wouldn't mind killing him. But even before I could get up the two steps to the front door, it was pulled open hard and fast. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and let my bag slip out of my hand. Logan looked destroyed. He looked like he was in pain, horrible, excruciating pain. And it hurt me. As he started to walk out to me the first thing I could think of doing was raise my arms. He looked down and hurried out to me throwing himself in my body. I wrapped around him fast putting one hand on the back of his head, and one in the middle of his back. I gently laid my head on top of his and sighed out gently rubbing his back. "I was gone for a day Loges…"

"I don't want you gone again. I don't want to be apart." He was sobbing, shaking and clutching onto my sweater in the back. I kissed his head softly closing my eyes. "I need you James." I didn't say anything back, right away because of several reasons, one being how happy I was to have in my arms again. But the biggest reason was that Kendall was in the doorway looking like he had gone through hell, and back, without a lick of sleep. He wasn't smiling, nor did he look pissed. He actually looked heartbroken if I had to assume. But he managed a nod in my direction letting me know that above all else, Logan was okay, especially now that I was here. At least that's what I gathered from it. But once I was through talking to Logan, I was going to talk to Kendall, and I was afraid that topic would have something to do with Carlos.

Logan and I got in the house, and after setting my bag down in the living room and taking it all in, to make sure nothing happened at the house I turned to Logan who was staring at me, standing stiff and solid in his spot. I watched Kendall walk into the kitchen, but rather than saying a word to him I walked to Logan, grabbed his right upper arm and turned him dragging him to the stairs. He didn't say a word, or fight me as I carried him up the stairs, unzipping my sweater in the front. When we got to the top of the stairs I let him go and continued to walk to the bedroom. The first step inside a loud high pitched bark flew off the bed followed by a tiny fat little pug. His little curled tail was trying its hardest to wag as he jumped up at my knees, barking and yipping. I bent down and scooped him up, walking to the bed still. I stopped by the edge, let Romeo kiss my face and nip at my skin. I gave him a small kiss to the head before setting him on the bed and taking my sweater off completely. I gently tossed it to the end where Romeo ran, and started to make his own bed with my warm sweater. For a moment, the room went quiet, and I got a chance to glance around and take in my surroundings. The only thing I could think of doing was sighing out and thanking God nothing too serious had happened. But the silence broke just as sudden as it started. "I'm sorry I am a bad fiancé." I smiled, but I wasn't happy hearing it. I turned and gently sat myself down on the bed. I folded my hands in my lap and stared at him in the doorway. "For some reason, my stupid head told me to trust Louis. It didn't mean at any time I didn't trust you. I just had a weird feeling that Louis wasn't a bad guy and everything he had been doing, was purely because he's nice. Even when you saw all the signs, and you tried so hard to tell me, I ignored you and continued to trust him. I should have known, you sent those flowers. But above all that, I should have never done something as stupid, or thought of something as stupid as going to a bar and finding another man. Whatever my head was telling me, I should have never even began to think of hurting you like that. I know you can never forgive for that James, but I love you and I don't want to lose you." I raised one arm fast and motioned for him to come to me while patting my leg with my other hand. He wiped at his face and walked to me slowly. He stopped maybe a foot away, looking down and crying out quietly shaking his head. I set my hand back down and smiled small looking him up and down. I had noticed earlier how fucked up Kendall looked, but Logan was somehow so much worse. He had no injuries, no physical damage. But he looked tired, and worried. He looked stressed out, and the worst for me was how upset he looked. He looked like he was berating himself fin his head over and over, and that maybe he thought he already lost me. Which then made me think something so much worse, worse than I could ever imagine has happened. Maybe something between him and Louis. Regardless, I reached out for him. I grabbed the hem of his shirt and tugged on him making him take a few small steps forward. Both of his hands moved up quick to cover his face but when he was close enough I didn't need to see his face. I continued to hold onto the hem of his shirt while my other hand moved to the back. My hand cupped over his butt, but moved down quick to his thigh. I pushed on it, making him come even closer, so close in fact as I spread my legs, he fit in right between them perfectly and I could press my lisp into his chest. I kissed over his shirt, not that I was complaining. And keeping my lips pressed into his shirt I closed my eyes making my brain remember this exact moment in time. I wanted it to last forever. And the memory only got better when both his hands sat on top of my head and ran through my hair gently. I would have preferred there was no talking but I know my Logan. "I…Kendall kissed me last night. And before you go down there and get all macho man on him, please know I kissed back, but it didn't mean anything. I was scared and freaking out really bad, and I guess he thought the only way to calm me down would have been to kiss me, so he did. It meant nothing." I raised my head fast locking eyes with him. I didn't want to say a word. In fact all I wanted to do was throw him on the bed and kiss him. Trap him under me and kiss every square inch of his body. I don't know what it was that made me go directly to sex, especially because he just told me, our best friend kissed him but sex seemed like the right thing. And really, after we make up and he tells me more details about last night, I might end up in jail, depending on what happens with Louis, so this might be the last time I could ever have sex with him again. Or I was just horny and in love. I'm going with the latter.

I moved both hands to the back of his thighs and raised him quick. He gasped out and grabbed a hold of my shoulders squeezing hard. I turned us, without wasting a second and tossed him on the bed. I tore off my shirt fast, tossing that to the ground and crawled on the bed, over top of him. His hands went to my chest and he stared up at me, with wide eyes as I forced his legs open with one of mine. I set my hands outside his head and took him in completely. His eyes were glistening, and there were still wet marks on his cheek from his tears. His mouth was parted slightly, and his Adam's apple seemed to bounce up and down quite a bit, as if he was nervous. I pushed myself up and grabbed his left hand while on my way up. He pulled himself up while scooting back a little so he wasn't so close to me. I laced our hands together, rubbing his ring finger soothingly. He closed his mouth and let his eyes dart down my naked torso but moved them back up to my face. "I gave you that ring for a reason." He opened his mouth, but I beat him to the punch. "I love you. Nothing can change my mind about that." He closed his mouth again and looked down shaking his head. I bent slightly putting my lips on his, forcing his head up. He pushed into my kiss fast, letting my hand go and putting both hands on the back of my neck. He pulled me down roughly making us lay back on the bed. I held myself up outside his head while his arms dropped from my neck and moved to my belt on my black jeans. His hands were quick. My lips were quicker. I moved down from his mouth onto his neck and sucked, like my name was Dracula. When he got my belt undone, and my zipper and button pulled off and down, he started to push on my jeans and boxers with amazing force. He pushed them down as far as I could let them, but wasted no time in sliding his hands on and over my ass digging his fingertips into the skin there. I gasped out, raising my head. Furiously, and not so gracefully I started to push off my shoes while he raised up slightly to kiss all over my neck and chest. I kicked both shoes off and tried taking my socks off, but I was pushed. Hard, onto my side. I laid flat on my back quick grabbing my jeans and boxers and pushed them off the rest of the way, along with my socks, all the while watching Logan rip off his shirt and pull off his sweats. When my clothes touched our bedroom floor I laid back down and sighed out hard grabbing my dick. I started to stroke it, slowly taking in his naked form as it started to appear before me. While he sat back and pushed the sweats and socks off I smiled to myself and closed my eyes. "Is this healthy? I mean…we obviously have a lot we need to talk about and yet were having sex." I got no response which I was grateful for. This was not the time to start talking. I did however feel his hands on my chest rubbing a little before moving down my stomach and pushing my hand away from my cock. I opened my eyes then and watched with pure excitement as Logan grabbed my cock and started to suck said cock. I looked a for a few seconds, raising my head off the bed but after the fourth bob up I groaned out loudly and put my hand son my face laying back down. I ran my hand sup through my hair and gritted my teeth so I wouldn't yell out to loud and let him suck me with precision and talent. Sometimes I found it hard ot believe he could take all of me in his mouth but I never question him or his lack of gag reflexes. And usually he gives me a blow job until I burst because usually it doesn't take long. But this one wasn't long and I didn't come. He pushed off me, while still keeping a hold of my dick. I opened my eyes and got up on my elbows just so I could watch him. I figured out he only sucked me, until I was hard, because he was climbing on top of me while still holding my rock hard dick. When he was over top of me completely and started to push me inside him, bareback, I lifted my legs and set my hands on his thighs, lying back on my back. We both obviously needed this, so I took the tempo into my own hands and pushed balls deep inside him just as my tip entered. He moaned out really loud and slumped forward. He set his forehead on mine with his hands outside my head and let me hit into him, hard and fast, while holding onto his thighs still. He remained perfectly still as I slammed into him without mercy, and more surprisingly he remained quiet. We held eye contact, but after a while he started to get too much for him and he closed his eyes, groaning quietly. I must have hit his prostate because he moved his hands to my head and held onto the bottom of my ear lobes and squeezed his legs into the sides of my body. But with his eyes closed I looked around him quickly noticing the bed room door wide open. I laid my head back closing my own eyes, hating that I need to wrap this up fast, just in case Kendall came up to check on us, to make sure we weren't killing each other. Between our grunts and our bodies smacking against each other, I swear I heard a thud from down stairs but ignored it because I was inside the love of my life and I was seconds away from cumming. And when I did cum, I heard him whisper in my ear he loved him, while I also felt spurts of his seed hitting my bare stomach.

I vaguely remember him getting off me and running tot eh bathroom, or when he did. I remembered the cold of the wash cloth on my stomach as he cleaned me off, but I kept my eyes closed and my body completely still. It was only until he was back on the bed, next to me pulling me so I was lying on my side facing him, that I opened my eyes. When I did, I situated myself a little better and lifted my arm, he dove in quick and snuggled against me kissing along my collar bones. I gently held around his back tracing small designs with my fingertips and stupidly opened my mouth. "So…was he a good kisser?" There was a soft sigh after he pulled away from me. He stayed relatively close but his lisp were off my skin. "I don't even care about that Logan. But is that why you wanted me home?"

"No. We went to my work last night…my stupid head was acting up again and I had to know the truth about the flowers. I saw the packing delivery sheet, and saw that Louis signed off on them, which would explain why they said they were from him. He probably just took off your note you sent with them and wrote his own." I gritted my teeth again but stayed quiet as he sighed and scooted closer hugging me loosely. "Well even before I could see the paper, Louis and Henry came in the office, and because we were in Louis's office, we had to hid so we wouldn't get caught. We got in his closet he has in there and I was so freaked out Kendall had to cover my mouth. I think they reason they were there was so Louis could shred or take the receiving sheet so I couldn't see it. He didn't want me to find out the flowers were from you, and I know that because they started talking. Henry was complaining that Louis was spending too much time on…me and then he said some other stuff but the point is you were right, you have been right all along and I'm an idiot for thinking otherwise. If this is the part that you leave me because you deserve better, I understand. I'm not happy about it but I understand." I laughed quietly pulling him in closer to me biting on the bottom of his ear lobe. "I'm going to quit. I think it's the easiest way to handle this and if I quit now, nothing more can happen and maybe we can go back to New York and I can get a job there. I mean…I want you to have your job and since I am awful at picking a job for myself this could be…" I covered his mouth fast with my hand and got up a little over him shaking my head. He frowned and bit at my palm but I kept my hand over it and yawned before sitting up completely. He wasn't far behind but he got on top of me facing me while letting his arms hang off over my shoulders. I sighed out and gripped his hips kissing him once, softly.

"We will have an apartment set up when we go to New York. I'm going to be making a shit ton of money. I mean…a shit ton. If you don't find a job right away, it's alright. And…when you quit, I'm coming with you." He opened his mouth fast to protest but I raised my eyebrows and shook my head. "Logan…considering everything that has happened, and how well I have handled all of it, with not hitting that guy in the face with a hammer, I think I deserve to actually be there with you. I won't do anything but I have a few things I want to say to him, and regardless of you wanting me too, I going to. And whatever I saw, I don't want you to intervene. Just let me be the big protective teddy bear you love so much, and we'll be done. Alight?" He kept his mouth hanging open for a few more seconds as his eyes scanned over my face. After a minute or so he closed his mouth, turned his head and nodded quickly. I smirked, leaning in and kissed his neck hard, sucking along with it. He groaned quietly pushing away from me and jumping off my lap, right to his clothes on the floor.

"Come on…I think you should talk to Kendall…him and Carlos aren't doing so well." I frowned standing up and grabbing my jeans and boxers. I pulled them and walked to the closet grabbing a plain black and white flannel shirt pulling it off the hanger. I turned back to look at Logan and watched as he grabbed my shirt off the ground and pulled it on his body. I smiled, buttoning up my shirt in the front and smiled even bigger when he pulled on his sweats and turned to me. He gave a cute half smile and put his hand son his hips. "You were gone for a day, almost two…and I fell apart." I walked to him slowly watching him bit his bottom lip. "Lesson learned alright. Don't leave me again." I kissed his head gently wrapping an arm around his lower back.

"Deal." He hugged me quick and let me walk us out of the bedroom, him backwards. I turned him when we got to the stairs but still held around him as we bounced down the stairs, all smiles. However, getting off the last step, was as far as I could go. Logan slipped through my hand as he started talking, probably to Kendall. But Logan wasn't seeing what I was seeing. In the middle of the dining room, two chairs were knocked over, along with a glass of what looked like cranberry juice. My eyes went to Logan who walked right into the kitchen opening the fridge. But something was bothering me, and it just wasn't the two chairs knocked over or the spilled drink. It was that Kendall was nowhere to be seen or heard.

"Kendall? He must be in the bathroom…regardless…" Logan stopped, a soda can in his hand, just as he was walking out of the kitchen. He wasn't looking at me, but rather at the living room, which was being blocked from my view. "Ken…" He set his can on the counter closets to him and started to walk slowly. I walked fast and turned into the living room, before Logan could get to it. But again I was stopped, this time by seeing Kendall on the floor next to the coffee table, on his stomach. He wasn't moving and It didn't oak like he was breathing. I could see In his right hand something that looked like an inhaler. But it was barely in his grasps. "Kendall…" I was gently pushed aside as Logan walked in and gently fell to his knees by our friend's unmoving body. I saw him put a hand on Kendall's neck, which then led to a loud gasp. "He's not breathing James…help me…help me turn him over." My legs moved me faster than my brain had time to think. I was kneeling beside Logan and without and struggle I turned Kendall onto his back staring at his pale face with an open mouth. "God…we need to sit him up. I need…I need to puff some of this into his mouth…please James…" I went to work quickly by pulling Kendall up and getting behind him. I held the back off his head as Logan took the inhaler looking thing form his hand. "I think…I think he had a heart attack…I'm not sure…but if he did this might not help…or it might…I…I don't know."

"Loges…it's alright…just do it." We looked at each other for a moment before he opened Kendall's mouth fast and put it to his mouth. He gave one push onto the button on the top and I think both of us, took in a hard deep breath. Kendall remained completely still. I swallowed hard, wondering if I was holding onto my dead friend's body, just as Logan pushed the button again. This time Kendall jolted in my arms just to fall back against me, coughing and wiping at his mouth. Logan sighed out hard wiping at his face and reached for Kendall's phone on the table. He did something fast, dialed a number, and put it to his ear motioning me to lay Kendall down, flat on his back. I did keeping one of my hands under his head and stared at his face, as it twisted into pain. I glanced between Logan and Kendall, not sure which one I was more worried about.


	20. Chapter 20: Frakenstein

"I don't even remember it happening. I just know I felt that horrible pain in my chest, I stopped breathing, really quickly and then I woke up here. Where was I when you found me?" I could only lay my head on top of James's as he wrapped both arms around me and sighed. Kendall was on his back in a hospital bed with a tube in his nose and an IV in his arm. His eyes were hooded and he was pale, and almost sick looking. I felt horrible. I felt scared and worried for the closest thing to a brother I had ever known, beside Carlos of course. I hated that I had to be the one to pump air into his lungs and basically bring him back to life. The paramedic told me if I hadn't done what I did, Kendall wouldn't be alive. That wasn't very easy to hear. James had to calm me down quite a bit and I loved that he was here with me. For me and for Kendall.

"In the living room. I think you fell…I heard it and I'm sorry I didn't get to you beforehand but…" I kissed James head quick hearing the guilt in his voice. "Anyway, some chairs were knocked over, your juice was spilled over. I'm just glad you're alright dude." Kendall chuckled quietly and closed his eyes lying back completely. I closed my own eyes and snuggled down on James's body so my head was tucked under his chin. I slid one of my hands into his sweater underneath and fought a yawn letting the sounds of the hospital relax me a little bit. "This one was really freaked out. You had him scared buddy." I turned my head fast so my face was in his neck so neither could see my red cheeks. James only seemed to hug around me tighter making me feel 100 times better.

"Sorry Loges. I'll try not to have a heart attack in your house again." I groaned quietly, probably so only James could hear it. "Not that I don't want you two here, because I do, I just…is Carlos coming? Or does he not want to see me?" I turned and opened my eyes fast staring at my very hurt best friend. He sounded so sad. So heartbroken. I wanted to tell him a lot. I wanted to run to him and hold him. But I didn't need to. The hospital door, that wasn't closed all the way opened slowly and a petrified Carlos walked in slowly. I got off James's lap and watched with happy eyes as Carlos walked towards Kendall's bed tears running down his face. "Hey baby…come here." Carlos cried out quietly and dived head first into Kendall shoving his face in his chest. Kendall groaned a little but the embrace was so sweet I wasn't worried about Kendall being in pain. I don't even think Kendall was worried about being in pain. "I'm sorry about last night…" Carlos cried again and mumbled something, but it was only audible for Kendall. I heard a sigh from James behind me, and let him put a hand on my butt as he pulled me back into him. I could feel nothing but happiness watching my two best friends hug and kiss and wipe each other's tears away. However, because I was just happy to see Carlos with Kendall I didn't notice the other person who was now standing in the room, looking awkward. He had a coat in his hand that actually looked like Carlos's. But it was harder for me to think he was here to be a good guy for Carlos in his time of need. Seeing Louis and hearing my two best friends talking quietly, made me feel angry, and sad. I wanted to scream and yell at Louis to get out and leave us alone. I wanted to tell him he wasn't welcome. But the words couldn't come out of my mouth. In fact I couldn't see Louis anymore which kind of cleared the air for me and made it easier to see straight. James was standing in front of me, almost in a protective way.

"What are you doing here?" James sounded pissed, and he sounded ready to pounce, but he kept his cool. I stepped up fast, getting right behind him, slipping a hand into his back pocket of his jeans. I set my forehead on his shoulder and closed my eyes.

"Well…Carlos got the call that Kendall had a heart attack. He was a wreck. He couldn't drive himself so I offered to bring him."

"Well thank you, but he's in good hands now." I opened my eyes hearing movement from Kendall's bed and saw Carlos glaring at James. He wiped his face and swallowed hard looking from James, to me, and then to Kendall. He set a hand on Kendall's forehead which made Kendall smile and close his eyes, but Carlos didn't stay looking at him. He lifted his head, and looked at James again shaking his head.

"I asked him to be here James. I didn't ask you." I could see James's body literally droop. It might have killed him to hear Carlos say it. I know it made my head swim a little. I stepped forward fast getting in front of James, blocking him like eh blocked me. Carlos looked at me before looking back at Kendall sitting on the edge of his bed.

"Carlos…"

"Why don't you two just leave." It felt like a ton of bricks were dropped on my head, and my heart. Carlos and I have never gotten in a fight. We have never said anything to each other, that would hurt the other.

"Carlos I don't know what you're going through but I bet it's not easy to see the love of your life in a hospital bed after a heart attack but you guys are my best friends." Carlos jumped up quick. He looked at me, only showing anger. Kendall had his eyes open and was staring at Carlos, worried.

"Yeah Logan. The love of _my life. _Not yours. And best friends don't stab each other in the back." My mouth parted slightly and he shook his head. "It must be so fucking hard for you Logan. To have so many attractive guys chasing after you. And it must be so hard for you to have to lie to your fiancée about your stupid decisions. It would just be best if you and your boyfriend left us alone for a while."

"What the hell are you talking about Carlos?! I just saved Kendall's life! I had to see his unmoving, un-breathing body on my living room floor, an di had to pump air into his lungs! Nothing else matters except that Kendall is okay!"

"He wouldn't have had a heart attack if your problems, and James's stupid theories weren't stressing him out!" I fell a little hearing it and let my heart ache just a little harder. "And stop trying to act like you're so innocent and smart and good! I know what you did! I know you kissed him! I saw the picture Logan!" My mouth closed tight and for some reason my head snapped to Louis. He looked worried and when eh locked eyes he sighed out. "You have some nerves trying to act like you saved his life because you care about him! All you fucking want is everyone to worry about you and look after you. Give you attention! Why don't you tell James what the fuck you and Kendall were doing in Louis's office last night?! That you broke in and stole something form his office and then made out with your supposed best friend!" I was pulled back harshly and almost stumbled to the chair James and I were just sitting in. I couldn't stop staring at Louis. And Carlos was still glaring down at me.

"Why don't you calm the hell down and be here for your boyfriend while he's fucking sick." Everyone turned to James who was seething. It looked like he was going to say something else, and maybe lunge towards Carlos but he didn't get the chance.

"Babe…I kissed him." I looked down after seeing Carlos turn to Kendall. "Please…just calm down and hear me out. Logan was freaked out, and I acted like an idiot. We pulled away and that was it. It meant nothing." Carlos was crying again and sat himself on the edge of Kendall's bed taking his hand in his own.

"I can't be mad at you right now. You're in a hospital bed but…I just want to see you right now. I want us to be alone." My heart was definitely being snapped in half and then stomped on. I wanted to fall into both Carlos and Kendall's arms and just cry but I wasn't welcomed in this room right now. Carlos didn't want me here and maybe neither did Kendall. And before Kendall or Carlos could shoe us out, I was grabbed and pulled to the hospital door, right after James. I could sense how pissed and annoyed he was but he didn't give me a chance to question him or stop him. He did however drop his hand down form my upper arm to my hand, and laced our fingers together. I had never felt more safe or comfortable than when I pushed my body into him. At that point I didn't care if he took em to the ends of the world. I just wanted to cling to his body and cry. And cry I did.

I probably looked ridiculous and stupid for how I was reacting but I couldn't stop crying as James put me in my car and drove us away from the hospital. I never let his hand go and he continuously told me it was going to be oaky and that he loved me. It helped a bunches. I calmed myself down enough by the time that we got home that I wasn't sobbing or hyperventilating. It was a mix of sadness over getting kicked out of my sick friends hospital room, and knowing that friend had just had a heart attack. On top of that everything that has happened in the past two days has just kind of crashed on top of my head, and for some reason pulling up into the driveway of our nice, comfy, cozy home, made me calm down. I waited, while James got out, to clean my face and dry my tears. He opened my door and even reached in to take off my seatbelt. When he got back out of the car, I got out after, very fast and collided into the side of his body. He shut the door for me and clicked the button to lock the car, just as we walked up the walkway to the front door. We stopped short. I was shoved almost too roughly behind James making me glare at the back of his head, but remembering what I just saw made me look around him and grab his big, strong bicep. Our front door was wide open. It looked, actually, like someone had kicked it open. There was a piece of broken wood form the door on the porch. All the lights were of fin the house, which made it look a little creepy because it was almost pitch black outside. There was no noise, and no lights. It scared em and it worried me. "Babe…did we lock up?" James turned to face me for just a millisecond before turning back to the door and shaking his head.

"It…we had to leave right after Kendall and the ambulance. I think it was the last think on our mind. Just…go call the cops. Go wait in the car."

"I'm not letting you walk in there by yourself. Let's just check it out together, make sure no one's there, and then we'll call. Don't argue." I tried to walk in front of him, but he's too strong, and too quick and put me back behind me, keeping an arm on my body, to make sure I stayed right behind him. We started walking, and I fumbled with my phone so I could have a light. By the time I got it open and in front of us, we were a foot away from the door. James stepped in quietly and slowly tightening his hand on my hip. I gripped his sweater seeing the house, in the exact same shape we had left it. The chairs knocked over, the cranberry juice spilled on the carpet by the table. Besides the door, and for as far as I could see, nothing seemed out of place. However a sick disturbing though came into my head as I heard absolutely nothing in the house. Romeo…he wasn't barking, he wasn't panting and running down the stairs. It made me clutch onto James tighter with absolute fear. "Romeo…" James sucked in a hard breath and I tried pulling him back outside the house. In that split second that we weren't close, because I pulled back as he stayed put, someone, I couldn't see right away, came out of nowhere and hit James hard, in the head, with a baseball bat. His huge hard body fell to the floor within a second and before I could go to his unmoving body a hand wrapped around my mouth and an arm wrapped around my stomach, trapping my own arms under his. I assumed it was a he.

"Keep him quiet. Get the tape and the rope and help me get this Frankenstein up. Louis wants them both." That voice was so recognizable, but without seeing the face, I couldn't name it. I struggled and tried to get free, but the arms holding me against a huge, bigger than James, body was making it difficult. "Turn on a light. I want to see if I killed the oaf." I screamed into the hand holding around my mouth but it didn't do anything helpful. And then the light got turned on in our front hallway and five men, standing around James's body came into view. The first one I saw, I recognized easily. Detective John Steel. "Remember guys…we're getting paid the rest of our money tonight. If everything goes according to plan…" He stepped over James body and smiled at me tossing the bat with a little bit of blood on the tip to the floor, before looking back at one of the other men. I also looked and started to panic even more seeing my sweet little fat Pug in the arms of an unknown man. He looked content and happy, only because someone was paying attention. Worst guard dog ever. "We'll live the good life and have everything we want. Let's not screw this up. Get them both in the car. Someone is waiting for them."


	21. Chapter 21: Come Around

I wasn't sure how I was going to say this, or do this. He looked so sick, and so sad, but I was selfish, and I thought I felt even more sad. I was actually completely heartbroken. I felt weak, and I felt like just giving up. Falling to the floor and crying, not doing anything. But his hand was on my lap and he was staring at me. I had to talk to him. He was probably wondering why I kicked out our best friends, and why I was just so upset. The time was now, that I had to buckle up and get ready for the hardest conversation I was ever going to have. This would probably be harder than when I had to tell my parents I was gay. "Kendall…" I looked down at his face and set my hand on his which was holding onto my leg softly. "I can't do this anymore." The small little smile he had on his face, disappeared. I squeezed his hand harder and scooted closer on his bed licking my lips. My mouth was bone dry. "I thought after all these years of sitting back and watching you grow into the incredible, amazing, and happy man that, I would also. But even though you are happy and all these great things…I'm not." His eyes closed slowly and he turned his head away. "After I graduated college, I went everywhere with you, for hockey. I went to every game, and I sat on the sidelines watching the happiness intensify. I never spoke up, and I never told you I wanted more, because I thought that was how life was supposed to be. And for a while I was happy that I didn't have to work, and you and I were living the best life we could ever have. But I need more. I have needed more, for a very long time. And I finally got what I wanted when I got this job. But then things took a turn for the worst. It was like…I finally was doing something for myself, and you tried to take that from me." His hand moved off my leg, and went to cover his face. I think he was trying to cover his eyes, so I couldn't see his tears. But it was harder for him because of the IV in his arm. His other arm was unmoving. This was typical Kendall. Whenever he was caught doing something bad, or he was in trouble for whatever reason, he'd stay as still as possible. And I know the reason for him doing so is because having any emotions, or showing those emotions was bad, according to his dad. It was a habit he picked up from him that I hated. I hated the elder Mr. Knight for many reasons, but this one seemed to be the worst. "I could have forgiven you for all that. Because you don't control me like that. But it's what happened last night, that has really opened my eyes. You…you chose to be with Logan last night, even after I yelled at you and we fought. I was expecting you to come home last night and do something romantic like you usually do. But you didn't. You chose to be there for him, and on top of that…you kissed him. I can't forgive you for that Kendall. I can't be with you…this you, anymore. I understand Logan is your best friend, and he's cute, and everything you could ever want…I guess I understand. But because of that I can't do this anymore. I'll stay with you in here, and I'll make sure you're alright when you get out but after that…I think we need to take a break." I heard his breath come out hard and shaky which helped the first few tears of my own, to fall out. He was crying, like I was, but I wasn't as hard as him. He wasn't looking at me, instead, eh was just sobbing, shaking and sniffling every now and then. "Kendall…"

"Just go Carlos…just leave." I let my mouth part slowly and for some reason my body got off his bed. "Go Carlos! You have no problem ripping my heart out while I'm in the hospital…so just go! I don't need you here, and you don't have to give me any pity! Just leave!"

"Don't turn this around on me Kendall Knight!" He opened his eyes dropping his hand form his face and pushed himself up in bed. "I haven't been the one who has pushed you aside for my own dreams! I haven't been making out with any of our best friends! I haven't done anything to hurt you! You did this to yourself! You stopped loving me!" He reached out fast grabbing my arm and pulling me towards him. I tried to fight it, but his other arm reached up and he pulled me so close and so tight against him, I couldn't move an inch. I was actually surprised he had more strength than me. Of course…I was also a crying mess and felt horrible for just breaking up with him.

"Don't you ever say I stopped love you." His voice was low, and almost dark. He was crying still but he looked angry. And obviously very hurt. Emotionally. "How dare you assume I stopped loving you Carlos. How dare you try to make me feel like everything I've done has been to hurt you. After all these God damn years, how many times a day, a second did I ask you what you wanted? I was always putting you first and you fucking know it! You told me, after you graduated college, you didn't want to get a job right away, because you wanted to go with me for Hockey! I was always asking you Carlos…what you wanted what I could do to make you happy! So if after all this, you still blame me, I'm left to assume you lied to me every time I asked you! How dare you tell me I ever stopped loving you!" I covered my mouth fast and put my head down sobbing quietly. He let my arms go, leaving a burning pain there, but quickly set his hands back on me, putting them on my sides, pulling me even closer to him. I shook my head falling down on him hating I even said anything and made him so upset. "I'm so sorry…I'm sorry I kissed him. I am sorry I didn't come home last night. I can never take it back. But I will try, for the rest of my life, to make you happy and let you know every day how much I love you. I am not going to lose you Carlos. I can't and I won't. Even if I have to tie you to this be with me." I laughed in-between my tears and sobs and dug deeper into him. "I love you baby…I love you so much Carlos." I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him into me hard. He wrapped around my back and nuzzled his head into mine.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you…I'm sorry I thought breaking up with you would make things easier." His hands rubbed up and down my back softly, while he cooed in my ear.

"Shh…baby it's alright. Stop…come here." Our bodies untangled and he laid himself back down groaning, and rubbing his chest. I wiped my face fast and climbed up on top of the bed with him putting my legs up close to his torso. I set a hand on his chest and rubbed where his hand was, moving his hand away. "So we're not breaking up?" I looked up at his face seeing his perfect winning, gorgeous smile and bright green eyes. I moved my hands to the pillow under his head and leaned in kissing him hard. He set one hand on my body digging his fingertips into my skin through my thin dress shirt. I would have happily climbed on his body, and made out with him for the rest of the day. I actually would have preferred falling asleep in his arms seeing as I couldn't last night. But I heard a throat get cleared and a few pairs of footsteps walk into the room. It made me jump off the bed completely, wipe my eyes, and wipe my mouth. Two of the three in the room with us, were doctors, and they looked anywhere but at me. They had a faint hint of red on their cheeks that made me smile and look at Kendall who was also holding back some laughter. The nurse who was smiling big at us walked to me with a box of tissues and a bottle of water.

"We're not trying to kick you out. We need to run some more tests and need the room quiet, and with no distractions." She got closer to me as the doctors started pressing buttons and winked. "You seem like a distraction for him." I blushed taking a tissue and nodded. "Alright Kendall…we're gonna get you prepped. Carlos is gonna wait out in the hall for a minute while you take the tests." Kendall nodded and I moved to him quick, not caring about the doctors and grabbed his face kissing him softly. When I pulled away he was smiling with his eyes closed, on the brink of falling asleep. They must have gave him something already. I smiled backing away, all the way to the door and walked out staring at the love of my life, with happy tears coming out of my eyes.

As I walked down the hall, all the way to the waiting room, it finally hit me. Just as I stopped in front of the closed waiting room door, I remembered how cruel and mean I was to my two best friends. I felt like a jackass. I felt like even thought I still had Kendall, I was still going to have to face pain. I braced myself as I pushed the door open and scanned the small area only seeing one person, which surprised me. Louis. I wiped my face and hurried to him seeing a nurse staring at me and sat down hard and fast. He looked up from his magazine and breathed out tossing it to the chair next to him. "Carlos…are you alright? Is Kendall okay?" I nodded and smiled opening my bottle of water.

"He's okay. He's doing a few more tests. And I'm alright…just happy he's okay, ya know?" He nodded and smiled small setting a hand on my shoulder squeezing gently. "Did you happen to see…Logan? Or James?" He frowned and looked down shaking his head.

"They left. Logan was…Logan was really upset. Crying and clinging onto James. James looked pretty pissed." I groaned quietly and sat back in my chair taking a sip of my water. I let the cool refreshing liquid run down my throat while I pulled out my phone and clicked some buttons to pull up Logan's number. Right now, after everything I said to them, Logan would probably be the easiest to talk to. When I dialed his number I put the phone to my ear and put my bottle of water in my lap. The phone rang once before his voicemail came up. "_Hey you reached Logan. Sorry I couldn't get to your call but if you leave…" _I hung up fast and felt even worse. The phone rang once and went to voicemail, which meant he saw my number and hung up fast because he hates me. I groaned, hating that I now had to deal with James before Logan and dialed his number fast. Again it rang once, before being hung up. I shoved my phone back in my pocket and sipped at my water again. "I'm sure they'll come around Carlos. You were just upset and scared for Kendall. They'll eventually come back to at least check on Kendall." I turned smiling small and nodded, yawning big. I gently laid my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes. I don't understand why everyone is freaked out or creped out by Louis. He is really just a nice good, guy.


	22. Chapter 22: Four Little Words

It's hard to remember where I was. It was really hard to remember why I was here. I opened my eyes, and all I saw was black. I tried to remember how it was, that I got myself on the floor. I knew, about the only thing I did know, was that I was on my stomach, and every time I would breath in, I would cough out loudly. I turned my body quick so I was lying flat on my back and groaned out putting both my hands on my forehead. I touched something cold and wet, and it made my coughing worse. It hurt like a son of a bitch. It made my head spin. It actually made me feel like I needed to vomit. But I covered my mouth fast and squeezed my eyes shut, trying my hardest to remember what happened and where the hell I was. When the area went quiet around me and I got my breathing under control, I pushed myself up into a sitting position and again set my head in my hands. Somewhere behind me, I swear I heard…a creak? Maybe the springs on a bed getting pressed on. And following very quickly was a muffled…sad moan. I swallowed hard and cleared my throat wiping my wet hands on my pants. "Hello? Is…is someone there?" The muffled cry seemed to get louder and springs on the bed, I still wasn't sure got squeakier. I swallowed hard again and stood up. Way too fast, especially for my heads sake. I got dizzy immediately and wanted so desperately to lay down and take some Advil or something. But I couldn't. I was stopped immediately when something hit onto my head. Not once or twice but three times. I reached up blindly and felt…a light bulb. I sighed in relief and felt around in the air a little more before finding a sting. The moan's and cries were only getting louder and when I tugged on the light, the room, the very large, dirty and empty room came into view. I shielded my eyes, without closing my eyes because now that the light was on, the cries were even louder, but still muffled. There was nothing I could see in front of me, right away. But I did see the blood on my hands and I realized my head was bleeding. Depending on how long it has been bleeding and how bad it is bleeding, I could be really fucked. But I couldn't think about me. There was a loud, almost scream like noise that came from behind me and it made me spin fast and brace myself for what I might see. However…nothing could prepare me.

My first instinct seeing him was to run to him. And I did. Logan was probably 10 feet from me, tied to a bed. His wrists were bound, and then tied to the right bed post of the big white headboard. He had tape over his mouth. It looked like it was on their pretty tight making sure there was no chance he could get his mouth open. He wasn't tied anywhere else except by one foot, his right, also to the post at the end of the bed. He looked completely unharmed except for the tear stained face, and the rope burns rubbing on his wrists and one foot. He was practically screaming into the tape around his mouth as I fell to my knees by the bed and started to tug at the ropes connecting his wrists to the bed. They weren't tied very well, and he probably could have gotten himself out, if he wasn't so stressed. When his hands fell to the bed, right by his head I reached out quick and cupped his cheek wiping his eyes. "Shh…just calm down…I got you." He closed his eyes and cried into the tape again as I ripped off the rope around his wrists. When they were free I moved down to his foot fast, and also tore that rope off. When I turned back to face him he was sitting up and tearing the tape off around his mouth. I got up quick sitting next to him on the bed putting a hand on the small of his back. When the last of the tape was off around his mouth he breathed out hard and threw himself into my body. I gladly helped him crawl up on my body and held him tight as he cried out loud. I tried to put his face into my neck so the cries weren't so loud because I was suddenly aware of our surroundings. As if seeing him tied to a bed, and knowing I was bleeding form the head wasn't enough, It dawned on me that we were somewhere, that probably wasn't safe, or good. It looked like a basement. It probably actually was a basement because there was a staircase leading up to a door shut and probably locked form the outside. I swallowed hard knowing I should at least try to find a way out of here so I pet a hand through Logan's hair and kissed his head. "Baby…look at me." He lifted his head and quickly set both his hands on my head.

"Your head…you're bleeding so bad…here…" He got off my lap fast and ripped his sweater off quickly putting part of a sleeve on my forehead. "I thought you were dead James…I thought…baby I thought you were dead." He pressed into my wound while he pushed back down on my lap shoving his face into my neck. I gently took the sweater from him and held it against my head for him instead. He put his hands in his lap and snuggled harder into me sniffling and wiping his face. "It's Louis. I know it is. The guys who took us…one of them was that detective…John Steele. Him and some other guys are being paid by Louis to bring us here."

"Where is here?" He raised his head and shrugged wiping his face, getting the rest of the tears. "Okay…I'm going to try to open the door over there. Look around here…look for anything that might help, okay?" He stared at me for almost a minute before he nodded getting off my lap. I set his sweater on the bed behind me and also got up. I walked to the stairs while Logan walked to a darker corner of the room. I climbed up slower than usual because of my head but when I got to the door I had my strength and I had my wits. I turned the knob to get a door locked. I groaned quietly and threw my shoulder into the door as quietly as I could. Nothing. I gently placed my ear against the door and closed my eyes trying to find if I could hear anything. Again…nothing. I let the handle go, opened my eyes and turned walking down the stairs slowly. I got off the last one, and smiled small seeing Logan on his knees riffling through a box of stuff. I slowly walked towards him and when I got close enough I set a hand on his head. "Anything?" He sighed out standing up and turned raising a fairly small metal pipe.

"Just this…what about the door?" I gave him a sad look making him look down and put the pipe in my hand. "What…what do you think he's going to do to us?" I wrapped an arm around the back of his head and pulled him into me. He wrapped around me tight and squeezed.

"Nothing. He isn't going to do a damn thing to you or me. I promise." He nodded against me, somehow pushing harder into me. I slowly walked us back to the bed and sat down, all the way back, so I was leaning against the wall. I pulled Logan up with me, and set him under my arm. My head was now full on throbbing and all I wanted was a hot shower. But I let Logan snuggle up under my arm and lay his head in the crook of my neck. He set one of his hands on my stomach and gently rubbed over my abs making me close my eyes.

"After you asked me to marry you, do you know what the first thing I thought of was?" I hummed quietly in response and laid my head on top of his. "Where we would get married. And I thought about it more and I think…I think we should go back home. To Minnesota ya know? With your parents, my parents. I know of the perfect spot." I smiled small and opened my eyes looking in at the open area ahead of us. "Do you remember Lake Harriet? We spent a summer up there with Carlos and his parents in their cabin? I do believe that was the first time you ever got head." I had to giggle hearing him say it and he pushed in harder into me. I raised my free hand and ran a hand through his hair kissing his head softly. "Well…you know how big that place is…I don't think any church will let two gay dudes marry…so what if he had like…Kendall or Carlos get ordained online and have them marry us up at Lake Harriet? We could have a really pretty summer wedding. What do you think babe? After all this is over…after we get through this?" I raised his head fast and held it gently looking directly into his eyes. I didn't have the heart to tell him that when this is all over, I very well may not be alive. Louis is sick…he wants Logan, that much is certain. And I'm the only factor left, standing in his way. He's already had a guy hit me so hard in the head I was knocked out…who the hell knows what else he would do? But that isn't something I could tell Logan. He looks hopeful and he is looking at me, as if I have all the answers. I smiled small and leaned in, kissing his forehead gently. I closed my eyes and swallowed hard trying to think of the best answer to give him.

"Yeah…yeah we'll have our wedding up there. We'll…we'll do whatever you want. When we get out of here." He pushed into me hard and wrapped around me tight lying his head back on my shoulder. I opened my eyes and grabbed the small metal pipe putting it back in my hand. I squeezed around it tight and though if I was going to go out, I was going to go out with a hell of a fight.

I wasn't sure how long we sat there, clinging to each other because my watch, my phone and Logan's phone were all gone. It felt like 30 maybe 40 minutes had passed but I couldn't be sure. Logan was quiet, and didn't move around too much which made me think he was asleep, but I didn't say or do anything to check. I didn't want to disturb him. But it didn't come that easy. Both of us jumped up fast when we heard a door get slammed up above us. I heard a few different laughs and then footsteps getting closer. I ran, literally ran to the light hanging above where I was in the beginning on the floor and turned it off. "James…"

"Get on the bed Logan. Don't get off it. DO you understand?"

"James please come here with me." I squeezed tight around the pipe in my hand and listened to the door get clicked unlock. I backed away slowly and hit the bed. I was pulled down roughly by Logan who squeezed my arm and got behind me breathing hard. At least five footsteps came downstairs, no one saying a word. A few of the people stopped at the stairs while one walked to the center of the room. As if he knew where he was going to need to reach the light switched on, lighting up the room and illuminating both Logan and I. Logan gasped behind me and tightened his grip probably because Louis was standing in the middle of the room, smoking a fat cigar. He looked right at us, and smiled big gently dropping his hand form his mouth, letting smoke fall out. I tightened on the pipe while looking at the four guys by the stairs. One was Henry. He looked giddy, as if having two men in a basement, bloody and scared was something, exciting. I didn't recognize the other three but I saw their guns and I know they know I saw their guns.

"Wow…neither of them are dead. That's surprising. And…neither of them are tied up." Louis looked over to the other floor and took another drag of his cigar. One of the men with a gun stepped forward and cleared his throat.

"Well he was knocked out. And he…well he didn't even put up a fight when we tied him so…"

"I gave you specific directions John." John, I was assuming the detective Logan was talking about, stepped back and glanced down. "No matter…their here now. Now…if I could get complete corporation from the two of you…" Louis turned to us and stepped forward a little putting his free hand in his pocket. "That would be great. SO why don't you put the pipe down James, and stand up. And maybe I won't kill you right now." Logan gasped behind me and I reluctantly stood up dropping the pipe to the floor. Logan still clung to my arm never letting go. "Good boy…now if I could just have you step over here and if you could just keep your cute little butt there Logan…" I clenched my fists down at my sides and stared directly at Louis. He looked up at me and chuckled flicking some ash to the ground. "Wow…you are protective. How protective do you think Logan will be?" He pulled a small handgun out form his pocket and raised it directly to my head. I gasped out quietly and Logan got up standing in front of me. Louis only laughed and nodded. "Cute…why don't you step over here James, and get on your knees for me?" I quickly walked around Logan and walked away from him never taking my eyes off Louis. I stopped right next to Louis who kept his gun pointed at me. "Knees James." I reluctantly did keeping my clenched fists down at my sides. "Tie him up."

"No!" Logan yelled, and stepped forward, well ran forward but he was stopped quick when three guns pointed right at him. Louis looked horrified turning to the three men pointing at Logan and shook his head. They dropped their guns but Logan stayed put, terrified in his spot. Louis then turned to Henry and nodded. Henry grinned big brought a bag out from behind him and walked right to me. He was small…tiny and skinny, I could probably take him, but not with the four other men in the room. Instead I let Henry walk right up to me and kneel down in front of me staring at me. He smirked and stood back up walking behind me.

"Jesus he's handsome." I closed my eyes tight feeling my arms get yanked back and pushed together. He reached in the bag quick and not a second later my arms were being tied tight behind my back. I opened my eyes slowly and watched with pure hate as Louis walked up to Logan and grabbed a fistful of his hair in the back of his head. Logan closed his eyes but kept quiet pushing on Louis. "I bet that pisses you off." Henry whispered in my ear as he tied my hands tight. "Because it pisses me off too." I continued to watch Logan try to get Louis away but Louis was stronger than him. He managed to turn him so his back was flushed against Louis's chest. When he turned both of them were staring at me, Logan letting a few tears roll down his face. When there were no more tugs behind me Henry got up and grabbed his bag walking back to the other three men. Louis took another drag of his cigar before bringing the cigar down and blowing the smoke out around Logan's face, which I know he hated. He set his hands on Louis's one arm and tried to pull it off his body.

"So…this is how it's going to go babe." Logan groaned quietly slowly starting to give up trying to get Louis off him. "You are going to stand right in front of that man and tell him four little words, I long to hear." I swallowed hard while Louis forced Logan forward. Logan started to struggle again and tried getting Louis to stop. I felt a tear roll down my left cheek just as they stopped in front of us and Louis took another drag of his cigar. "John…Steve…come get this ring of Logan's left hand."

"No! Please don't!" Logan really started to struggle now and I even tried to get up but not only did John and Steve come to us, so did Henry and the other guy. Henry and the other guy held my shoulders down as the other two grabbed Logan's left hand and ripped the ring off his left ring finger. I clenched my jaw shut and felt a few other tears roll out of my eyes. John gave the ring to Louis who glanced at it for a minute before putting it out in front of Logan who was now sobbing.

"Put it in James's pants pocket Henry doll…" Henry moved forward quick and grabbed the ring, turning to me. He kneeled down in front of me and quickly shoved the tiny little silver ring into my right pocket of my jeans. I glared at him trying my hardest not to lean forward and head butt Henry. When he got up, Louis and Logan came into view and I stared up at Logan's pained face. "Go ahead Logan…tell James you don't love him. Tell him or…" Louis nodded once to John who raised his gun right at my head.

"Okay! Don't shoot him! Please don't shoot him!" Louis smirked almost evilly as we locked eyes. Logan cried out quietly now clutching onto Louis's arm, only for support. Louis seemed to grip onto Logan tighter making him lift his head and stare directly at me. I looked away from Louis and parted my mouth open shaking my head gently. The tears were nonstop at this point and seeing Logan open his mouth only made it worse. "I…I don't love you." Louis cigar dropped to the floor and he stepped on it gently.

"Good little boy." He put his now free hand on Logan's forehead and leaned in kissing his cheek softly, and lovingly. "Make sure he stays down here. And make sure…he's warm." Louis turned, with Logan in his arms and they were up the stairs. Logan put up a fight but it didn't help. They disappeared fast with Henry behind. He gave me a sad look telling me he felt bad for me, but he did nothing. Just followed close by. I could still hear Logan's sobs and struggle as they walked further away from me, and as I heard something liquid get thrown around the room. I fell back on my feet and bowed my head down closing my eyes and crying.

"Are we really going to do this? What if someone sees us? We could go to prison!"

"Just shut the fuck up and give me the matches." My head snapped up fast and I turned to see the three guys, all with empty gasoline canisters in their hands. One of the guys handed John a box of matches and he opened it fast, with a shaky hand. "Alright…let's get going." They hurried to the stairs and while the other two ran up, John stopped and the bottom and breathed out hard. And suddenly it hit me. This wasn't just any basement. It was mine. They had us tied up, and locked in our own basement. And what was worse was they were going to burn me alive in this basement. I looked back to John who had a lit match in his hand. He sighed out had shook his head fast. "Sorry…"

**So if you haven't noticed, I've been updating this story really fast. I am actually close to ending it, but I want to make it as good as possible, so please be patient. Also…I promised you guys I'd start up the sequel to chapter nine, like a week or so ago, and I haven't yet. Honestly…I'm stuck on a plot line. I just don't know what to do with it. And I don't want it to be lame so I haven't started it yet. If you have any suggestions, I'm all open. And again, for my other stories, please be patient. I'm going to finish this story before the other so just bear with me. Thanks for reading! Review if you fancy!**


	23. Chapter 23: Oh Romeo, Oh Romeo

"Make sure he knows how long he needs to stay in bed." I glared at Carlos who was gently rubbing my back, under my grey sweater, but over my white shirt. He took a prescription bottle from my doctor which had the rest of my pills for the next 5 days in it.

"Well normal people who have a heart attack don't usually leave the hospital after 12 hours. However, because you won't be under a physician's care immediately, I strongly suggest a week Kendall. Seriously…no hockey, no crazy party's and no sex." My mouth dropped open as Carlos giggled and leaned on my shoulder. "As hospital policy states, you must go out in a wheelchair. Come on…" I groaned sliding off my bed and let my feet covered in my favorite slippers touch the hard floor. The doctor along with the help of Carlos set me in the chair and I groaned and moaned the whole time. When I was seated and reassured the doctor and Carlos I was oaky and I was wheeled out. Carlos stayed bent behind me as he pushed me out putting his chin on my shoulder. We were stared at and probably looked at weird, but I didn't care. I reached up, running my fingertips over the slight stubble on his chin and cheek and closed my eyes laying my head back on his body. He kissed my open neck softly and straightened up as we walked out through the waiting room. When we pushed through the automatic doors an ambulance pulled up and the back doors to it burst open. Carlos moved us out of the doorway quick and while he still pushed me out of the way, I turned to see a man on a gurney being pushed into the hospital by two paramedics. The same doctor who helped me rushed out and asked what happened. All I heard was a house fire and two people in very critical condition. And then a second ambulance pulled up and just as Carlos pushed me out of view those back doors were pushed open. I sighed turning away and reached back putting my hand on Carlos's. He will never know how lucky I feel that he kept me, and I was going to keep my promise. I was never going to hurt him again, and I was never going to take the chance of losing him again.

A million things were running through my head, and I wanted nothing more than to go home and start figuring things out. My career, my love life, my friends…but Carlos has this incredible talent of taking all my problems and throwing them out the window. While pulling up to a drive through window of a fast food place. After getting both of us food, food that probably isn't the best for a guy straight out of the hospital from a heart attack, he parked in an empty part of the parking lot and shut off the car. He immediately started to stuff fries in his mouth while handing over a burger for me. I took it laughing at his messy face and laid my head back on the rest taking off my seatbelt. "How do you know me so well?" He looked up fast with eyebrows raised and fries hanging out of his mouth. I chuckled reaching forward and took a fry from his mouth throwing it in my own. He outed and pushed the fries in, swallowing, probably not chewing. I peeked through the buns on my burger and noticed only a patty with a leaf of lettuce. I frowned and turned back to him. "You should have had them take off the meat and put on a salad. It would have been healthier."

"Says the guy who is already reaching for his chocolate milkshake." I smirked taking a quick sip. I set it back down and reached out with my free hand setting it on his cheek.

"I'm going to retire." He stopped mid bite, of his burger and set it down gently. I also set mine down and nodded shrugging. "You're too important to me to risk again. I'm going to retire, we're going to fix up our house so we can raise a family in it one day, and when I get healthy I'm buying you a ring and I'm gonna marry you. And then…we'll go from there." He sat back in his chair and smiled small taking off his seatbelt. "I love you Los. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I won't ever screw it up again. I promise."

"Yo también te amo Kendall." I slipped my hand up to his neck and pulled him towards me so I could gently peck at his lips with my own. I loved when he spoke to me in Spanish. It was definitely a turn on. But I couldn't get myself too excited. I can't have sex, because I just had a freaking heart attack. But we weren't on the same wave length, like usual. He shoved his tongue into my mouth and grabbed my sweater pulling me towards him. I tried to push him away put it only seemed to make him push harder into me. I gave in rather quickly, and way too easily.

Somehow, he got me in the back of the car and somehow he got on top of me. I gripped his slim hips while he grinded down on my crotch, which was slowly rising. He had his hands up and under my shirt and was rubbing my abs, my chest and every now and then, he would pinch my nipples, driving me up the fucking wall. At one point I gave up and laid back letting him abuse the hell out of my neck, biting sucking and licking. He knew how to get me hot. He knew how to get my dick hard, and as he did those things, I was suddenly reminded why I was in love with this man. I grabbed the sides of his face fast and lifted it up so we were looking at each other. He was panting but so was I. I licked my lips casually watching his eyes dart down to them. When eh looked back up I opened my mouth and shook my head. "I never need to look anywhere else, for the rest of my life. You are everything I want." He smiled and leaned back in, but I turned my head and let him go back to assaulting my neck. I smiled small gently pushing my hands into his jeans in the back. I kept my hands above his boxers because I liked when he undressed in front of me. I liked when he exposed his beautiful tan skin to me, when he wanted. He was a tease and I loved everything about it.

"SO you don't care you just had a heart attack and the doctors' orders were to have no sex?"

"Listen…" I pushed him up hard so his crotch crashed into my stomach in the middle and his chest was in front of my face. "My dick isn't going to suck itself." I was smacked on the back of my head just before he pulled on the hair on the back of my head, making em look up at him.

"You have a big mouth for a guy who has a raging boner and only one other guy to take care of it." I smirked and opened my mouth letting him shove his tongue into my mouth once again. We made out like high school students and we touched, rubbed, thrusted onto each other like it was our first time. I managed to get the upper hand at one point and got him on his back in the backseat of his car. I hovered over him pushing his shirt up on his body and kissing onto his flat stomach with slight muscle definition.

"You've been working out…"

"No…I just have been doing little things James suggested…" Suddenly I was pushed back and he was sitting up. I sat on my feet, still covered in my slippers and panted leaning in to attach my lisp to his neck. He let me, but it was a struggle while he tried to get his phone out form his pants. "Babe…heal…just give me a damn minute." I groaned sitting back all the way on my butt and wiped at my mouth and neck where his kisses were still lingering. I sighed out like a child and watched him dial someone and put his phone to his ear. He also sighed out and leaned back stretching his legs out on my lap. I set a hand on his foot but quickly pushed my hand up, under his jeans and rubbed his shin. "Hey Logan…It's me…uhm…I know I was a jackass at the hospital. But I just…Kendall as out, he's healthy and okay and I really…I really want to talk to you. I'm sorry…call me back alright. I love you." He put the phone down fast and put a hand on his forehead shaking his head. "They hate me. I was a complete dick and now they hate me. I cannot ever make this up to them."

"Yes you can. Logan doesn't handle fights with you that way. How about…we eat, you maybe give me a quick handy job and we go over to see them." He dropped his hand and frowned raising an eyebrow.

"Always thinking about your dick aren't you?" I nodded fast and grinned big. He jumped up quick and shoved a hand down my pants while also grabbing one of my hands and shoving it in his jeans. I looked up and grinned at his perfect face, as it twisted into pleasure as soon as my hand wrapped around it.

We didn't last long, that I knew was going to happen. And after cleaning our hands and stomach from cum, we got back in the front, me getting behind the wheel. I was energized and wide awake, so I wasn't worried about driving. Even before we left the parking lot, we finished the food Carlos bought, while he told me about his day at work before he left for the hospital. I hated hearing Louis's name come out of his mouth still, but kept it too myself. When we finished our food, I put both his hands in my right one and drove off towards our best friend's house. He would talk to me about little things, yawning here and there, while also asking me how he could talk to James and Logan about everything. Just as I pulled down their street and started to tell him to just apologize, I was stopped fast. There was police tape blocking the whole street off. And where James and Logan's house once stood, was nothing. "Oh my God." I didn't have time to stop Carlos as he jumped out of the car and ran under the police tape. I cursed under my breath and also got out, walking as fast as I could up to charred remains of my best friend's house. "Logan! James!" The weirdest part for me when I walked up to the empty lot was how there were no cops, firefighters or ambulances. There was absolutely no one here. Carlos was walking through the rumble crying out quietly. I set my hands on my hips and looked around shaking my head looking for any sign of life. "¡Dios mío! Kendall?"I sprang into action running towards Carlos who was now on his knees digging through the rumble. "No! Kendall!" I fell down at his side and felt a hard breath leave my body seeing a small lump of fur being lifted up from under the ruble by Carlos. Romeo wasn't hurt, at least I didn't think so. He looked a little banged up form being under the ruble and he was whimpering probably because he was scared, but he didn't look hurt. "¿Está herido? Nena es duele?" I gently took Romeo from Carlos who was now sobbing and shaking. Romeo barked quietly and lowly whimpering still. I touched all four paws, ran my hands over his fat little body trying to see if anything was sensitive, but nothing came up. I looked up to Carlos who was patting the little dogs head.

"He's…he's fine Los. Let's…we need to call James or Logan again. And maybe call the hospitals or cops…" I stopped suddenly looking up and remembered when we left the hospital. The two ambulances that pulled up. The paramedic told the doctor they were burn victims in critical condition. I turned to Carlos quick and shook my head. "We need to get to the hospital. Now." He only nodded standing up and helped me stand by taking Romeo. I stood up fast and set a hand on his back as we walked through the ruble. I almost ran into him however when he stopped suddenly and bent down fast.

"Ken…" He stood up fast and turned to me raising his hand. Sitting in the middle of his hand was a somewhat shiny silver ring that I recognized easily because I was with James when he bought it. Logan's engagement ring.


	24. Chapter 24: Break Me Down

I only stopped crying, because there were no more tears left. I had run out. Just like I had run out of strength or energy to fight. I was giving up. I had been tied, beaten and now thrown to a floor in the past hour…maybe day, and it had finally worn me out. My hands were tied in the back, my legs bound at the knees and ankles. I had tape over my mouth again, equally as tight as it was before, and now, also, my eyes were covered by some rag, or bandana. It was red, I saw it before it went over my eyes and tied behind my head. I was in some pain, only because when I was taken from my home, with my fiancée in the basement tied up and probably getting beat, I started to fight. I was put in the back of a slick four door car with Louis, while Henry got in the front and drove off. I screamed and yelled, hoping my neighbors, anyone, would hear but no one did. And when I was tossed into the back seat, I still tried to fight Louis. I even tried to open the door closest to me. But he was faster…and so much stronger. He grabbed around my neck and turned me to face him. He shoved me hard into the door behind me and I hit my head, and my upper back hard onto the door. While he squeezed my throat he continued to push me into that door making the pain shift from my head and back, to my neck where his fingers were digging into. I tried still to get his hand off me, and to just get away from me but I blacked out. He managed to squeeze every ounce of oxygen out of my and I passed out. I woke up, tied to a bed again. Except this time my hands were tied separately and both my legs were tied, also to the bed posts like my hands. I screamed and I thrashed around as I best as I could just so I was heard, and it worked. Louis came in. With a gun. He put it to my head and threatened my life. After, he told me he hated hurting me and putting a gun to my head, but I needed to learn and I needed to be obedient. Well that was just not going to happen. I screamed again. I was hit. Hard, right on the mouth. My lip instantly started bleeding. I cried out a little and turned my head away from him but that only lasted for so long. My head was yanked back to face Louis, and his now exposed dick. His pants were down and he was rubbing himself while putting the same gun to my head. He gave me specific instructions. I was to open my mouth, not bite, and suck like the good little boy I am. I screamed and yelled again crying still which got me another smack to my mouth. And then he shoved his dick inside my mouth and forced me to give him a blow job. It was disgusting, because the blood was basically the only lubricant I had. And he wasn't small, which made the whole experience worse. But it didn't stop there. The torture and the suffering only intensified. After being sexually forced to do something by a man who continued to tell me he loved me and didn't want to hurt me…he untied me from the bed and threw me into the shower, to "Clean me up" because I looked disgusting. He stripped me completely down to my birthday suit and tossed me under freezing water. He lathered me in soap from head to toe and made me sit under the water, even after he ran his hands all over my body. I think that was when I really gave up. When he kept me under the water freezing me down to my soul. I was shivering and shaking and when he pulled me out of the shower not even bothering with a towel, I saw myself in the mirror and felt like crying. My lips were blue, all the color was drained form my face and I had Goosebumps covering my body. And that's how I ended up here. Well after being tossed around and hit every now and then. It was part of my "numbing" process which Louis kept saying. He assured me, all the pain and torture would be for the better. He didn't want me to fight, and argue, and this was how he was going to do it. He was going to break me down so hard, I didn't have the will to fight. Well, I was just about there.

The sound of the door opening had no effect on me. I wasn't effected nor was I concerned with who it was. I know it was going to be Louis. I know he was going to come to me, beat me, do whatever he pleased. And I wasn't going to be able to stop him. The hand on my head, also didn't affect me. A few soft fingertips ran through my hair and a soft sigh cascaded around my face. I clenched up but only because I felt a shiver run up through my spin. I heard something, perhaps a plate get set down beside me, but didn't move an inch. "Logie baby…" I bit down on the inside of my right cheek and groaned quietly. "You need to eat something. I made you a special dinner." I remained unmoved and didn't make another noise. "I know it seems hard, and it seems like this is hell but I promise you, it will be for the better. So just get on up, eat some food, and I'll show you how much I actually adore you." I kept down clenching both my fists together, so hard, my knuckles were probably white. "Okay…it seems you haven't learned a thing." I was grabbed, hard, on my upper right arm and forced to sit up. My body was completely bare still and even a little wet, and I wasn't on anything soft, or warm. I was on concrete. It was cold, on top of the cold around my body form the water. As soon as I was sitting directly on my butt, the bandana around my eyes was ripped off and I was forced to look into the eyes of the man I would hate for the rest of my life. He had a sick smile on his face, and something weird written in his eyes. If I had my doubts before, I believed it now. He was absolutely insane. "Look…cheese pizza. Your favorite." I lazily blinked and shamelessly let my stomach growl. I was hungry. The last thing I remember eating was an omelet Kendall made me the morning after he kissed me. And who knew how long ago that was. "Okay…I'm going to take this tape off your mouth so you can eat, and you have to promise me you won't yell or scream. Promise me?" I nodded slowly and looked over his face. He looked sincere. He looked like he was in love. It made me sick. But I was hungry. "Good sweet baby boy." I closed my eyes softly and put my head down as his hands went to work on taking the strong tight tape off my face. It yanked on my skin and hair a little, but it wasn't as bad as anything else I've been through. When the tape was off completely I raised my head slowly and breathed out through my mouth calmly. I shivered a little and watched as he grabbed a slice of pizza off a plate near him.

"Can…" I stopped when he turned to me fast and swallowed hard. "I'm…cold." He dropped the pizza fast and set his hands on my face. I jerked a little but it went unnoticed.

"I am so sorry Logan. Let me get you a blanket. And I'll get some candles in here and turn up the heat okay?" I nodded softly and he grabbed a phone from his pants pocket. He put it to his ear after doing something fast and cupped my cheek as he waited quietly. "Henry…can you turn up the heat for me? And bring me a big, warm blanket, the biggest we have and some candles? Thank you baby." I closed my eyes again and tried to push my face away from his hand but his other hand came up and held me softly. "I hope you aren't too mad at me for everything that's happened. I have never wanted to hurt you, you know that." I nodded again heard him move around me. "I just know when love is real, and baby…the first day I saw you, I knew I loved you, and I knew you loved me." I opened my eyes fast and locked eyes with him. He grinned big and moved in closer to me. "I also know James was just a ploy so you didn't show how much you actually did love me." Hearing it, snapped something in my head. I shoved him away with my bounds hands as hard as I could and stood myself up. I didn't get far. Louis was standing just as fast as I was and grabbed my arm. He pulled me back into him hard and again put a hand around my throat. He squeezed and he pushed into my wind pipe hard. "I guess you didn't learn. Do I have to brand it onto your body Logan?! Huh?! When will you learn that you are mine, and only mine! What will it take?!" I struggled and wigged in his arms trying my hardest to get away from him. He only squeezed harder on my throat. "You need to learn your fucking lesson the hard way. I was going to wait. But you pushed my fucking buttons and now you are going to fucking pay." We started walking fast I of course putting up a fight like usual. If he wasn't careful, I was going to black out again, and I would be useless to him. Unless that was his plan.

He forced me out of a room that was literally chained shut. I recognized the house as Louis's and groaned quietly closing my eyes and letting my body go limp. It didn't bother him, as he just wrapped both arms around my waist, letting my neck go, and picked me up. I coughed out quietly and laid my head back and turned it watching the house go by me. I spotted Henry who had a blanket in his hands and a few thin, long candles. I opened my mouth and wanted to scream at him to help me, but he had an evil almost grin on his face. I closed my mouth and groaned again feeling him walking us upstairs. He was taking me somewhere, to do God knows what to me. In this moment, the only thing I could think of, was James. I missed being touched softly and I missed how when he did touch me, he did it so he knew he loved me. Every sound he made, every word he spoke was out of love. He has never done a thing to harm me. He's loved me since the day he met me. And I have loved him just as much. And now here we are. Well…here I am. In the arms of a lunatic who says loves me, but throws me around like a rag doll.

I was thrown, literally thrown onto the bed, in a huge room. Probably the master bedroom, his room. I turned fast, so I was on my back and his hands were on me once again. One hand covered my mouth, squeezing it hard. His other hand shoved my right leg up bending it at the knee, pressing it into my body. I raised my hands and pushed onto his chest, but didn't get far, as my hands were tied tight in front of me. He let my mouth go fast to grab my other leg and also press it into my body. When one of his hands stayed on the back of my legs and his other hand went down to his pants, I started to understand. I could only do one thing, and that was scream. I yelled, at the very top of my lungs. I heard help me, slip out in my scream but it was cut off very quickly. I couldn't believe in the short amount of time since he's thrown me on the bed, and forced my legs up and open, how quick he was to pull his penis out of his pants. Feeling it get shoved and forced into me, made something turn off in my head. I had given up a little in the beginning because it felt hopeless but now it was completely soul changing. I had never thought in my entire life, I would ever be that guy to let something like this happen to. Although I wasn't screaming anymore, I was crying. I was crying my eyes out, but without making a single noise. He let my legs go, when he realized I wasn't going to fight, and with his hands free, it gave him a chance to put his hands on my sides and pull me a little closer to the edge so he had better leverage to force himself inside me. My legs were numb and limp. They just hung around his body and while a stronger version of me would have used my legs to kick him away, I couldn't muster up enough strength to do such a thing. And even thought my hands were tied in the front of me, and they could have done some damage if I swung them hard enough, they also stayed down on my chest. My head fell to the right, gently as the tears poured out. I stared at the open door that could possibly lead to my freedom hoping, wishing, but knowing no one was going to be able to save me. I again, thought of James. But he left my head just as quickly as he entered. Because another man was forcing himself on me and because of that, I was never going to be good enough for James again.

**Okay I just want to say…I love how worried you guys were about Romeo! That is why I put him in the end of the last chapter…so you guys know he's safe and okay. Because confession time…every time I watch a scary movie, and a animal, Dog, Cat, Horse, is involved I stress. I hate watching a movie that shows an animal being hurt or anything like that, so I not only had to make you guys feel better about Romeo, I did it for myself too. Just a little F.Y.I. Also uhm…I am so sorry about this chapter. It was actually kind of hard to write. Literally, I wrote all day yesterday as much as I could, and just finished it up now so…yeah. As always review if you wish!**


	25. Chapter 25: Head Trauma

I was painfully aware, there were four little fuzzy paws on my bare chest. It was painful, only because my whole body hurt. I don't think there was anything wrong with my chest, but something definitely didn't feel right in my whole body. I wanted to open my eyes and figure things out, but felt zero energy in my body, to make my eyes open. And that was a silly thing really. I mean…how hard is it to open your eyes? "…Ya know what? I don't think they have the slightest clue as to what the fuck they're doing."

"Babe…"

"No that's bullshit Los! How could they not know where the fuck he is?!" I groaned as loudly as I could get because the two voices around me…were familiar. They were safe. They were family. And I wanted those two voices to help me open my eyes and explain to me why I was in pain. "I'm going to go get the doctor. I think he's waking up." I groaned again and thankfully, got my eyes open. The first thing I saw was the back of someone's head and that head walking out of a room. I slowly rolled my head to the side hearing a chair creek and swallowed hard seeing a face, I know I knew. He smiled at me, this man I was certain I knew, while reaching out one of his hands and setting it on my arm.

"James…how do you feel?" I blinked lazily breathing out hard and rolled my head back to the front. I saw clearly in front of me a bed. A bed that I was on. There was a blanket over my legs and a little over my chest, but what was covering the rest of my chest lying on his belly was a tan ball of fur. A small little pug. "Here…let me get him off you. As soon as he saw you, I swear he had a miny heart attack. Logan has been right all along. This is your dog, and your dog only." I turned my head as fast as I could back to the guy now standing, taking the dog off my chest and felt my mouth part open slowly. He looked down at me worried for a minute while he set the dog down on my bed next to my arm and swallowed hard. "James…are you alright?" I reached up quick, grabbed his arm and squeezed softly. He looked down at the contact before looking back up at my face and sitting back down gently. "James?" It hit me. It was Carlos. I know him! I know who he is, and I suddenly remembered who I am. But what was causing confusion was where I was, and why I was in pain.

"Carlos?" He sighed out heavily and scooted closer setting a hand on my shoulder. "What happened?"

"That's what I was wondering." He smiled small and carefully set his hand on my head. I relaxed a little and took my hand off his arm to gently pat my dog's head. Yes, I knew it was my dog now. For a minute there, when I woke up, and heard the voices of my two best friends, I knew nothing. I could barely think of what my name was. But now it's all coming back to me slowly, minus why I'm here in the first place. "The other man you were brought in with…Detective Steele…he told the doctors and the cops he works with he happened to be driving by your house when he saw the fire James. He ran in hearing you yelling and pulled you out, just in time. He said…he said you had fallen down into the basement, which is what you told him I guess. He isn't sure what happened but…God James…no one knows where Logan is, and we found this…we found this when we came to your house. We also found Romeo stuck under some rubble too but he's not hurt. He got checked out. But this…" I watched him reach into a sweater on his body that looked too big. Kendall's. He brought out a shaky hand, turned it upwards so when he opened his hand, his palm was facing up. And sitting pretty in the middle of his palm was a silver ring. Logan's engagement ring. I frowned and reached out slowly, feeling a horrible knot in my shoulder and carefully took the ring from him. He sighed out and opened his mouth again but two people walked into the room, one being Kendall. He smiled big at me as he got behind Carlos's chair and set a hand on the back of his neck. Carlos sat back leaning into Kendall as the doctor walked to the other side of my bed smiling small holding a clipboard. I watched him flip through some papers before sighing and sitting on a chair clearing his throat. I was about to get the 20 questions and I was not happy about that.

It felt like an hour had passed before the doctor got up and explained he would have a nurse come in with something to eat and some pain medicine. I was basically told that not only was I lucky to be alive, I was very lucky I didn't have one burn on my body. The way the detective explained it, I was in pain when he found me and a fire had accidently started. I'm not sure how, mostly because it is said the fire started in the basement. What would have caused a basement fire? First of all…if I remember correctly, we had nothing down there. It used to be my office for work, but since getting the job in New York, we cleared it all out and put the extra computer in Logan's office. There might have been a few boxes of some of my old tools or random things form Logan's parents, but nothing, and I can confidently say that nothing down there, would have caused the fire. Now, with that in the back of my head, I had to question where the hell Logan was. I can't remember anything happening that could have been bad between us. In fact the last thing I remember, was driving home after Carlos kicked us out of Kendall's hospital room. But as many people have told me, that was almost three days ago. So what happened that could have gotten me to this point, with Logan missing? And as far as the damage done to my body, the detectives story didn't measure up. He carried my huge ass body up the 17 stars leading to the first floor of our house, with a house fire happening. Maybe. But what I couldn't grasp was why I couldn't walk up the stairs myself. The only thing that seemed to be wrong with me, is the huge gash on my head, and a little bit of smoke that managed to get in my lungs. Other than that, I was completely fine. The only reason I was sore, was because I had been in a hospital bed for the past three days, unmoving, passed out. The doctor thought I was going to slip into a coma. He was certain I would have long term memory loss. But I didn't because of a miracle I guess. The trauma to my head is so sever, they think I smacked it on the stairs as I was falling down, but if that was the case…I wouldn't have been awake to yell for help. And certainly I wouldn't have been loud enough for a guy in his car, to hear. "Kendall…shut the door for a minute." My thoughts were making me think crazy things and telling Kendall to close the door was one of those things. He gave me a weird look, but got up anyway and shut the door. For the hour I was asked question, and explained what was wrong with me, my body woke up and I got a lot of my energy back. I was able to push myself up in bed and sit crossed legged with Romeo curling in a ball on my lap. I stretched my back a little and watched Kendall sit on the end of my bed letting Carlos lean on his legs.

"So…do you remember what actually happened, or do we have to go with the deceives story?"

"Kendall Donald Knight, me vuelves loco." I smirked as Kendall shrugged and ran a hand through Carlos's hair. Carlos yawned big and laid his head on Kendall's thigh. "I don't want to assume the detective is lying because why would he. Nor do I think we should be clouding James's head right now especially because it is probably already clouded." I gently patted his shoulder shaking his head. "The only thing that is really bugging me out, is where the hell Logan is."

"Maybe he pushed James down the stairs and set the house on fire. What did you do to him? Piss him off?" Kendall was smacked in the crotch after Carlos sat up and pushed away from him. Kendall groaned but smirked as he held himself and watched Carlos stand. "What!? It's possible!"

"It is not possible you asshole! Logan would never do something like that to James!"

"How do you explain the ring and the dog in the burned down rubble that is like a kid to James?" Carlos crossed his arms over his chest and walked over to the window in my room shaking his head and mumbling shit in Spanish under his breath. I sighed out quietly, and folded my hands onto my dogs body staring directly at Kendall. He smiled small and shook his head looking down at his hands in his lap. "I'm an asshole alright. I shouldn't have kissed Logan. And if I caused anything between the two of you and if you two are not doing okay because of me…I mean, I'll let you beat me to a pulp. I will hate myself if anything that happened is because of what happened with Logan and I."

"Do you love my fiancée?" Both Carlos and Kendall snapped their heads to me, looking worried and horrified. I laughed and scratched Romeo's back making him roll onto his back and make me scratch his belly. "Something that happened the night before I came back, scared him and worried him. You were there for him. But…I'm still a little confused as to what it actually was that got him freaked out." Kendall swallowed hard and looked back at Carlos who dropped his hands to his sides and parted his mouth slightly. Kendall and Carlos eyed each other carefully before Carlos looked away and cleared his throat.

"I will not listen to that again so I'm going to go take Romeo outside to go potty, and get us something to eat." Carlos walked to me quick, scooped up Romeo and leaned into me. He held my neck gently, kissed my cheek and turned walking out of the room fast, shutting the door behind him. Kendall was left staring at the closed door, probably hurt Carlos didn't give him a kiss. I kept staring at him even as he turned to me and chuckled quietly.

"What is that about?" I nodded to the door Carlos just walked through and he breathed out hard getting off my bed and taking off his sweater.

"Well…after Carlos and I made up, I explained to him why Logan and I went to Louis's office in the first place. He isn't too keen on hearing me bad mouth his boss. He is 100% certain, Louis is a good guy, even after I told him, he stole the flowers you bought for Logan, and said they were from him." He waved his hands around and shook his head. "Anyway…the thing that got Logan freaked out is, that we hid ourselves in his office just as Louis and that kid Henry came in. I don't know man, Henry was getting mad because I guess…Louis spends his time being concerned with Logan and Louis said it was going to take time but I don't know what the hell that means, and then Logan asked me what Louis was going to do and I told him nothing and then eh freaked out and I kissed him but I wasn't trying to hurt you or him, okay so please don't be mad." He was standing at the foot of my bed, pale looking, probably worried I was going to reach out and start beating the shit out of him. Although I was a little mad they kissed, it wasn't enough to make me reach out and hurt him. My brain also started working, hard, and any thought of what Logan and Kendall did left my head.

"Henry." I looked down at my blanket bunched up and frowned shaking my head.

"Henry? What about him?"

"I'm…I'm not really sure why but hearing that name is making me remember…something. Like…Henry saying I was…I am handsome or something?" I looked up at him and saw him smile small.

"Wow…you have head trauma and you still have an ego. You are amazing James." I frowned and laid back in my bed putting my hands on my face and rubbing it gently. I was frustrated, no doubt about that. I hated not knowing the whole exact truth about something, especially concerning Logan. "I mean…we've tried calling Logan and it goes straight to voicemail so maybe…if you called he'll answer." I set my hand son my stomach and shook my head softly.

"If he's not answering Carlos, he's not going to answer me. Trust me." He frowned and walked back to my bed sitting down.

"The scariest thing for me is…if Logan was gone before the fire, and I am sure you didn't start that fire, who the fuck did? I mean seriously…someone wanted your house burnt down because it is burned the fuck down. And I hate to say this…I mean I don't because Carlos isn't here, but I think it has something to do with Louis." I raised my eyebrows fast and sat up even faster nodding my head.

"Then maybe we should have a little talk with Louis." He opened his mouth but I beat him. "Or maybe we should have someone else, do the talking for us." He closed his mouth fast just as the door to my hospital room opened and Carlos, holding Romeo, walked in, with a doctor behind him and nurse behind him holding a tray of food. I smirked at Carlos and turned to James who had wide eyes and a pissed off face. He shook his head and I nodded mine. I gently took Romeo from Carlos and turned to him smiling small. "Hey Carlos…can I ask a favor?"


	26. Chapter 26: Demands

There is no point to being afraid anymore. There is no reason to feel pain, anymore. I am no longer worried about what might happen to me. I have no thoughts of my own, and I have no reason to do anything for myself anymore. When someone takes over your life, your body, your mind, and your soul, you become no one. Your identity is gone, and you belong to someone else. It is a new concept to me, but I'm learning fast and every day it gets easier. Well I'm not sure if it's been a lot of days but definitely two, maybe three days have gone by. Maybe four. Regardless…after the first time someone takes advantage of you…rapes you, you learn fast. He says to do something, you do it. He tells you to keep quiet or tell you he wants to hear you say you love him, you do it. Otherwise you are hit. Otherwise you get thrown and tossed onto the floor, just to get an even worse beating. I've always known I'm a fast learner.

Because I've spent almost every waking minute with Louis since becoming his prisoner, being alone in a huge room with no means of entertainment, is worse than what he's done to me. I guess that was his plan all along. To get me attached. To get me dependent on him. He's succeeded. Waking up to an empty bed, an empty room made my heart sink. Was it something I did? Said? How could he just leave me alone in a room, with nothing to do. I actually stayed in bed for a while unsure if as soon as I got up, I'd get punished. But my stomach growled, and I had to pee. It was the first time stepping off the bed, by myself, without being grabbed or pulled. Usually, since he brought me in the room, if I had to go somewhere, if I needed something, he had a hand on me and was right beside me. But now, my feet were on the ground and I was standing on my own. I hated I had no clothes and I was cold, almost all the time, but again, you learn to keep your mouth shut about little things like that. For some reason I walked quickly into the master bathroom. I didn't want to take the chance of upsetting him so I went to the toilet fast and peed as quickly as I could. I was going to go straight back to the bed after I flushed, but as soon as I did, I turned and saw myself in the bathroom mirror. I had bruises and a few cuts on my face, but they were healing and didn't look as bad as I thought. If I had my choice, I wouldn't have any wounds or bruises. Not that I had a choice. My neck was definitely bruised because he liked to hold me there. As he had sex with my unwillingly body he liked to hold me down by my neck. Auto asphyxiation or something. It wasn't my favorite. My favorite thing to have done to me while someone was having sex with me, mostly by James, was to be kissed on my neck, talked to sweetly, and most importantly have someone look me in my eyes, and tell me they loved me. Not just because I was a "sexy, good boy" as Louis put. But that wasn't the point. It was how my body looked, bruised and battered, and how astonishingly accurate I felt compared to my body. I felt bruised and battered. And I looked it.

I didn't look at myself long because a thought occurred to me. As I stepped out into the bedroom I saw the bedroom door. I ran to and grabbed the handle, only to be let down, quickly. It was locked, of course. I should have known that. But seeing as how I ran to the door and had a glimmer of hope made me happy to think I might actually be okay. But scanning the room before walking back to the bed made that hope diminish. There was no TV, no computer, no phone, no outside light in this room at all. The windows, were literally boarded up by 2x4's. There was a dresser a bed, and a desk that had a small lamp on it. There is a light over head the bed, along with a fan, that has been on since I first was thrown into this room. Without being able to communicate with the outside world, I had no means to even fight anymore. I mean I didn't a while ago...because I've been violated but now, knowing exactly what he was doing to my head and my heart, it was easier to give up.

I think I waited for a solid two hours before I heard a key in the lock on the door. I got back on the bed and pulled the blanket over my body and when that door opened, I pulled the blanket up higher on me and tighter. I watched Louis shut the door, locking it again and slip the key into his pocket, but when he started to get closer to me I looked away lying my head on my knee. He sat next to me, making me close my eyes. A hand went on my bare shoulder making me tense up even more, but I remained quiet and unmoved. "I had to go into work this morning. I had taken too many days off. And apparently…there is a quiet a witch hunt going on, looking for you." I opened my eyes slowly and raised my head staring at his face. He rubbed my back and smiled small. "The associates I hired to take care of…that obnoxious thorn in my side, failed. Someone spoke up about the fact that two of my employees have gone missing in the past week or so, and I am now a suspect." I swallowed hard watching his smile fade and feeling his hand tighten on my shoulder, to the point of hurting. "But believe you me Logan. No one is going to find you. And no one is going to take you form me. You are going to learn to be with me, and if not you know I have ways of making you. Now…" He stood up and unbuttoned his shirt, quickly. "Why don't you get on your hands and knees and turn that beautiful ass up to me." I looked down quick at the blanket covering my body and somehow, by the grace of God, I found my voice.

"Would you ever kill me?" He laughed quietly beside me and leaned down kissing my temple. I closed my eyes hard and clenched my jaw shut.

"Not on purpose my sweet." I opened my eyes and stood up off the bed, pushing past Louis hard. I turned to him and saw a look of annoyance spread across his face. His shirt was off and he was slowly working on taking off his pants.

"Then I want something."

"Excuse me?" I swallowed hard and gracefully covered my exposed soft dick.

"I said I want something. From you." He sat on the edge of the bed slowly and nodded along. "I want some clothes and…and I want to know that James is okay, and he is not hurt." It was as if someone a lot stronger than me, was talking for me. I know it seems pointless to demand things from this kind of man, but something weird was coming over me. "You can do…whatever else to me. But don't…" I stopped seeing him stand up. That was all he did fortunately. "Don't you hurt James." He chuckled quietly again and looked down, at his belt which he continued to take off. When it was off from around his waist he looked up at me and smiled big. In two long quick strides he was in front of me, wrapping his brown leather belt around my neck. Tight. SO tight he managed to push me back into the wall by the dresser and push me up pushing his knuckles on his right hand into my Adam's apple. His other hand held around the belt, tightening with every breathe he took. I closed my eyes hearing a chocking noise come out of my wide open mouth. I pushed on his strong body hard, but it wasn't helpful.

"Who the fuck do you think you are demanding things from me?" His voice was low and very scary. I opened my eyes and locked eyes with him. He automatically softened and loosened the belt around my neck. I coughed out loud and tried to push him away still but my hands were grabbed and the belt that was around my neck, was now around my hands getting tied tight. "The only reason you get hurt, and I make you cry, is because you let it happen." He spun me and shoved me face first into the wall. He kept my bound hands down in front of me but got my legs spread. I closed my eyes and laid my head on the cool wall. "You don't give a fuck about James. This…" He one again shoved his large dick inside me, without a warning or any kind of prep. He didn't go slow, and he go soft. He pushed into me so hard, my hips smacked into the wall making the experience even more painful. I cried out quietly but it went unnoticed as he grabbed a chunk of my hair. "This is the only cock you are ever going to have, do you understand me? Forget about James, and forget about being anything more than a piece of ass for me, because that is all you are. You are worthless and fucking disgusting." He was nonstop pounding into me and whether it was true or not, it felt like something was running down my inner legs. Like maybe…blood. He's done it before. He's been so rough and hard, he's made me bleed so this wouldn't be the first time, but I wasn't going to complain about it. Not now. "If you ever talk to me like that again, if you ever grow a fucking spine again, it will be the last thing you do. You only open that mouth of yours when I want to put my dick inside. Understand?!" He thrusted once more inside me, harder than before making em cry out loudly, close my eyes and make two tight fists. He shoved my head hard into the wall while still pulling my hair and after a few more thrusts, hitting onto my prostate roughly each time, he was grunting, groaning and spilling his seed inside me. He kept inside until he was completely done and when he was he pulled out, let me go causing em to the fall to the floor while still on the wall. I curled my legs up to my body and tucked my head down crying out loudly. "Get the fuck up and clean me off." I yelled out, without knowing why because it was pointless. "I said get the fuck up!" My hair was grabbed again and he tilted my head up. His other hand pried my mouth open and just before he shoved his dick in my mouth I closed my eyes and prayed he would just kill me already.


	27. Chapter 27: Unfortuently Kendall

"I've already spent too much time not trying to find Logan. I need to do something…I need to try something. And I want my two best friends with me when I do anything I'm thinking about doing." Neither of them said a word, because neither of them could argue with me. They could sure as hell try. And Kendall even has. When I asked Carlos for a favor, he said he wouldn't let Carlos do something, with Louis, by himself. I then asked him if he was okay with the thought that Louis could be hurting Logan, and that shut him up quick. Carlos has been fairly quiet through the whole thing. Since me asking and now us leaving the hospital. He just sat in the back of the car and stayed quiet. Until now I guess…

"James…the cops already did this. And…and maybe you should be resting. Your head ya know." I looked down at my right side and dug my hands deeper into my sweater pockets.

"Carlos look around. My house…my whole life I built with Logan has been burned to the ground. I've been unconscious for three days, and in that time what have the cops done?" He folded his arms across his chest and looked ahead of us at my now burned down house. It was the first time I had been back here since I almost died in it I guess. I was crying, not hysterically, but enough for Kendall to put a hand on my shoulder and keep it there. They both told me, after the doctor did, that I shouldn't be walking around, using energy. Fuck that.

"I think he's right babe." I swallowed hard looking away from Carlos and watched Romeo scope out the burned pieces of rubble that used to be the foundation, my furniture, my pictures…my life with Logan. "Yeah…the cops are investigating and are searching for Logan but…in the meantime, that they don't actually find him, what's happening to him? And more importantly what's happening to this behemoth besides us? Friends…brothers stick together and he needs us right now. I'm not happy with his plan, especially because it revolves directly around you but…I think Logan would do it for you."

"Really nice asshole. Make me feel guilty." I saw in the corner of my eye Carlos kick at a piece of black wood by his foot as he groaned loudly and bent down at his knees calling Romeo. Romeo of course, being the ham that he is ran over quickly. Carlos scooped him up gracefully, stood himself up, and turned to face Kendall and I. "Alright…but if and when we get there, and we find nothing and we find nothing out…" He stopped and sighed softly shaking his head staring at me. "You will let the cops take care of it, and get some rest." I nodded once and he groaned turning to walk back to the car. "Estoy demasiado viejo para esta mierda."

Our car ride to Louis's house was quiet and tense. Kendal drove while I got in the passenger seat and Carlos sat in the back with Romeo who was passed out form the excitement. My plan seemed fool proof to me. We would show up at Louis's house. While I asked him if we could come in and talk, Carlos would have to use the "bathroom" and disappear until he found Logan. Or…not. I just needed to know for myself. I was having a hard time trusting any police officer especially the one who "saved" me. And while they did search Logan's office at work, searched my burned down house, and even searched Louis's house, I need to do some digging on my own. The digging came sooner than I would have liked. One minute I'm thinking about the plan and the next, were parked across the street from Louis's house and Kendall is shutting the car off. "So…run this by me one more time. You two are going in there…and while you ask him questions about…if he has heard from Logan, Carlos is going to need to pee and sneak off to try to find Logan?" I nodded taking off my seatbelt and heard the door open behind Kendall's. "Babe…wait!" Kendall jumped out quick making Romeo jump up into his seat and bark at the now closed driver door. I sighed and gently pat Romeo's head as I got myself out of the car, painfully and slowly. My head was throbbing, but was worse was how bad my heart hurt. I just wanted to see Logan. And I wanted to remember what happened. "Please me careful…if anything happens…if he says anything to you or does anything to you, you come running out and get me, or if you can't just stay with James. Promise me, alright?" Carlos rolled his eyes but nodded kissing Kendall's chin. "And you…" He turned to me shaking his head as well as a finger, in a very motherly way. "If something doesn't seem right, get the fuck out of there and I'll call 911, alright?" I nodded and rolled my eyes much like Carlos did, getting a giggle form him, and a sigh form Kendall. I walked to Carlos linking arms with him because I was starting to feel dizzy and led him across the street to Louis's house. "I love you Los…you too buddy."

"God he acts like were going to war." I laughed quietly letting him pull me in closer to his shorter body. "I don't' know if I told you this but…" We walked up to the front door of Louis's house and before I reached out to knock he got in front of me, stopping me. He put his hand son my forearms and squeezed gently. "Thank you for being there for Kendall. If you and Logan hadn't…" He looked down shaking his head hard. "He's here because of you. And whatever you need me to do to help find Logan, I'll do it." He looked back up at me and smirked turning to the door and knocking. "I didn't want to seem too eager in front of Kendall. He worries."

"With good reason." I was elbowed softly and it made me laugh quietly. Not a millisecond later the front door opened and Henry's very…almost angry face appeared.

"Can I help you with something?" I stayed frozen in my spot as Carlos took a small step forward and opened his mouth, but the whole world seemed to go quiet, and everything stopped moving around me. I knew what was happening. The doctor explained. For someone who suffers memory loss, the memory could not come back at all or come back at any time. When it does come back you experience a feeling like no other. It's almost like watching it play out on a movie screen and my trigger was seeing Henry. Seeing his pissed off face and hearing his voice made me remember, just a little sliver. I was on my knees, getting my hands tied around the back of me. The person who was tying me was Henry. That was when he said how handsome I was and then…

"James? You alright?" I looked to Carlos fast and nodded. "Come on…Louis is in the shower but he says we can wait inside." I followed fast avoiding eye contact with Henry as best as I could. I hurried past him and jumped slightly hearing the big front door slam behind me.

"Just go ahead and make yourselves at home. We just got a…a cat and I'm trying to train him, so if you will excuse me. I'll let Louis know you're here." He left us standing in the foyer of the house as he hurried to the stairs and took them two at a time.

"Seriously…" Carlos sighed and shrugged his shoulders pulling me along to the huge living room I didn't get a chance to see the last time I was here. "That kid is freaky. He's so weird. But now that he's gone," Carlos peeked over my shoulder before smiling and clapping the same shoulder. "Let me go look around downstairs. I'll be right back." He walked past me fast and I turned to follow and I even said his name quietly, but I couldn't get him to stop. I frowned and gently set myself down on the couch because I was seriously starting to get dizzy. I grabbed the arm rest of the couch and looked at my surroundings slowly taking it all in. Nothing looked out of the ordinary, and nothing seemed to point to Louis having Logan. Being able to sit down and really think about made me question myself. Maybe I hit my head way to hard and I'm just…insane. Maybe we had a fight. Maybe I pushed Logan too far and he really did try to kill me? But then again…that seemed more unlikely then this guy kidnapping Logan, especially because part of my memory was coming up as Henry being down in my basement with me, tying me up. I really needed to try to remember the rest of that specific memory. I felt like my body was urging em to remember that specific part.

"James?" I shot up fast and felt chills go up and down my spine as I watched Louis walk out to me zipping up a black hoodie on his body. I was actually surprised how laid back he looked compared to all the other times I've seen him. He had jeans on, a plain white shirt on underneath his hoodie and only a pair of white socks. He looked like a normal guy with probably nothing to hide. "I heard about your house…and that there may be foul play involved but I didn't think it was this bad…are you alright?" He pointed to my head and surprisingly I played it cool. I smiled and nodded scratching at the stiches on my head.

"Minus some miner headaches and temporary head loss, I'm doing alright."

"You don't remember what happened?" That took me by surprise. He sounded…relieved to know I couldn't remember. And he sat down patting the seat next to him for me to sit with him. I did smirking small and cleared my throat nodding.

"Yeah…the doctor said the detective that pulled me out, saved my life. If hadn't of been there I could have burned alive, but I don't really know how the fire started, and then with Logan missing…"

"He's still missing?" I locked eyes with him hard and gritted my teeth nodding. "Gosh…I am so sorry James. I hope he's alright ya know…I mean…I hope whatever happened, was something he wanted, and not something that he is being forced to do." He smiled small and scrunched his eyebrows together hard. "You know what I mean?" I looked away chuckling quietly and nodded again.

"Yeah I think so. It's just so weird to me. This wouldn't be like Logan if it wasn't forced. He isn't this stupid and irresponsible. I mean he just got a promotion that he loves. He wouldn't just give it all up for something stupid." He nodded gently and sat back a little coughing quietly.

"Well he did give you your ring back." I stopped breathing and thinking letting the air around me turn to ice, real fast. I stared at him, seeing that same stupid fucking grin on his face and again I was thrown back to the night Logan was taken from me. We were locked down in our basement. We tried to find a way out, but there was none. Louis, Henry and three other guys, one of them being the detective that "helped" me, came down stairs. Louis made me get up and get on my knees next to him. Henry then tied me up asking if it pissed me off to see Louis so close to Logan. And then he made Logan tell em he didn't love me, and he yanked his ring off his hand, putting it in my front pocket. And then Louis left with Logan, and Henry and told the other three to burn me alive. "Oh Carlos!" I looked down fast closing my eyes hoping the tears I was forming strictly out of fear, wouldn't spill out.

"James? Uhm…I think you should get home…or rather my house. You don't look very good." I stood myself up, not staring at Louis and walked to Carlos who looked pale. Which was odd for Carlos. It took a lot to freak him out. "Come on…" He put a hand on my arm and tugged gently smiling and waving back at Louis. "Sorry to cut this short Louis…"

"It's quiet alright. He should be resting anyway. Please James…if you need anything, or if you hear anything from Logan, let me know." I formed two tight fists down at my sides and bit my tongue so I wouldn't start cussing him out. The cool refreshing air from the open door was the only thing to calm em down, but it was bittersweet. I was happy to be out of that house, but what if Logan was being held there, against his will and what if he was being hurt? My sweet little Logan…

"Kendall?" My head spun back to reality seeing we were by the car and Carlos was bending inside to look in the empty car. Well, it wasn't empty. Romeo was in the passenger seat looking sad but jumped to life seeing me. He leapt in my arms and I caught him but I spun and started to scan the dark dimly light street for a sign of my blonde best friend. "Kendall?!" Carlos got back out and pulled out his phone, to no doubt call Kendall.

"Kendall?!" I squeezed onto my tiny dog looking around still and swallowed hard ready to go up to Louis house and demand to search his house. But as I opened my mouth again and took a step forward I was stopped by a hand on my bicep.

"Shh! Listen!" In the short distance from our spot by the car, and Louis's house, I heard a very distinct ring. A ring form a phone that could only belong to Kendall. I knew it could only belong to Kendall because he is the only guy I know that would have the Sports center music as a ring tone. "Kendall?!" Carlos was running towards Louis house, trampling over bushes, flowers and the grass all the way to the side of the house. I tried to go just as fast but between my head and the squirming dog in my arms, I couldn't be as fast.. Not like it mattered. When I got there, Carlos had already picked up Kendall's phone and was looking around the huge section of grass surrounding Louis's house. But Kendall's phone on the ground didn't make me think he had gone anywhere, other than in the house itself. And just as I was going to point it out to Carlos I heard a thud…something strong and big hit the inside wall of the house, right next to us. Carlos jumped behind me and again I was going to open my mouth to tell him to call the cops but a scream…a distinct and horrified scream came from up above us.

"Kendall?!" I looked up quick but had to step back fast so I could look up. Carlos stayed behind me but when he saw where I was looking he gasped out, covering his mouth fast. Right above our heads were a few windows. All three of them were boarded up. And each of them and a little bit of light poking out between the boards. And I knew…I just knew that, those boards…one of those rooms, was where Logan was, and now, unfortunately Kendall.


	28. Chapter 28: Next Time

I was speechless and I felt like hurling myself off the top of this house, to smack into the ground below, and kill myself. I hated this so bad. I wanted, to and I've been trying to fix this but my current situation is making that harder than I would hope. My arms were tied behind me, which were then tied to the bed post. I also had tape around my mouth and if I wanted to, I couldn't scream. But I didn't want to. All I wanted to do was whisper softly that I was going to fix things, and that we would be okay. I locked eyes with him and I groaned quietly into the tape around my mouth but he remained still and he remained quiet. It was like he was seeing me for the first time, or something. And it felt like I was seeing him for the first time. He looked scary and so different. He wasn't the same Logan. He wasn't the same guy I used to get drunk with almost every weekend while we were in college, and he sure as hell wasn't the same guy, that I talked to fro hours every night about our love lives and the struggles that go along with them. I was so afraid, he was so different, I might not even see the real Logan again.

There was a moment before I was thrown into this room and tied up, I heard my name by Carlos and James. I think everyone heard it actually. Especially Logan because after about the fourth time my name was called form outside, I heard Logan's voice scream it. That confused me. I was grabbed and threatened with a gun to my head to keep quiet, an di did. I had never seen a real gun to be completely honest. It scared me a little. SO I did keep my mouth shut as I was thrown into the garage wall and was faced with Louis. He looked happy to see me. And when Logan screamed my name Louis quietly and calmly told the two guys holding me, to take me upstairs and see Logan. And here we are. Except now, I almost didn't want to see Logan.

I gently pulled my legs up to my chest and laid my head back trying again to get my arms free from behind me. It was for not. I groaned angrily and loudly thrashing my arms as best as I could. But I heard a noise, a floor board creek and looked up quick. Logan was standing and he was staring at me, as if I was an alien. I took in his form, feeling sick to my stomach seeing the bruises, the dry blood and the cuts. I noticed the plain black sweats on his body, but they looked way too big. When my eyes moved back up to his face he looked down quick wiping his face with his hands. I tightened my fists and shook my head softly. And then he took three quick large steps towards me and fell to his knees by my body. His hands went behind my back and he started tugging on the rope tight around my arms. I closed my eyes and laid my head back swallowing hard. He was fast and not so gently tugging on my arms. When it started to get loosened, I started to help, wiggling my arms free and within a few seconds my arms were free. He sat back fast staring up at my face as I started to take the tape off my mouth. "Kendall he's going to kill me." I groaned feeling frustrated as the tape started to come off and I shook my head. "But I need you to tell James I love him, okay? You need to get out of here, and you need to tell James I love him." I ripped the tape off my mouth throwing it to the side and reached out fast. However I stopped myself fast seeing him jump slightly and bow his head down gasping quietly. I lowered my arms fast and shook my head gritting my teeth together. "Please Kendall. Promise me." I moved in slower and softer and grabbed his arms. He sobbed quietly and surprisingly to me, he threw his arms around my neck. I pulled him into me fast and let him clutch onto me, crying. I squeezed my own eyes shut and held back the tears. I wouldn't be surprised if I cried. Logan's been missing and now I am seeing him. Hurt and scared at the hands of a sick bastard. Who knows what he's done to him. Who knows how much pain Logan has had to go through.

"Loges…I already called the police. James and Carlos went inside to see if they could find you or find any clue as to whether Louis had you and I stayed outside." He clutched harder and cried louder digging himself harder into me. "But then I saw the windows…there boarded up. And I ran over to them and I called my buddy in LAPD and he's having the cops come out to get you. To get us. So…so you don't need to tell me….you don't have to ask me to tell James that you love him. You're going to be able to do it yourself. You understand me?" He sobbed directly into my neck and I opened my eyes glancing around the room rubbing his bare back soothingly. "Is there anything in this room that we could use…to help?" He shook his head softly but I couldn't take no for an answer. I gently untangled us form each other and stood up fast walking over to the closet door. I pulled it open fast ad stepped in turning on the light. I first spotted some empty hangers hanging up and a pair of old worn out running shoes on the ground. And then in the corner, almost hiding in the dark of the corner, I saw a black bag. I rushed to it and fell down to my knees by it, opening up the bag. I quickly reached in and pulled out a camera. I turned it on fast and licked my lips going through the memory. It was a bunch of random pictures, here and there, with Henry or Louis, and then to my complete horror of Logan. And most of the ones of Logan, weren't actually pictures. They were videos, and the first one I played I could only watch for a few seconds. It was Louis, forcing himself on Logan, who wasn't even trying to fight. He was crying and he didn't look happy, or excited, but he wasn't screaming or trying to get him to stop. Well my dumbass head immediately thought to check the other ones and sure enough, every single video of Logan was of him getting rapped. I could hear him crying out in the room quietly still and it was enough to make me turn the camera off, pull out the small tape and quickly smash the tape with the camera. I didn't want anyone to ever see this. I never wanted Logan to have to relive this and the best idea I had was destroying every single tape that was in this black bag. After doing that, I checked the bag some more, but found nothing else use full. I threw the camera back down on the floor and got up turning off the light walking out of the closet. I rushed past Logan who was now leaning against the end of the bed on the floor with his arms around his legs, his head on his knees, crying, and rocking back and forth. I was headed to the bathroom, but I stopped short turning softly. I unzipped my sweater and walked to Logan gently kneeling down next to him and putting my sweater on his shoulders. He jolted up fast and without looking at me he slipped his arms through the holes and zipped the sweater up. He wrapped his arms around his body and curled back into a ball crying still. I gently squeezed his shoulder and stood myself back up continuing my walk to the bathroom. Once inside I went to the sink and opened up the medicine cabinet searching for a razor. I would take anything right now just to use as a weapon. Except there was nothing in the cabinet. Nothing except a package of band aids. I grabbed them and slammed the door shut hard letting my anger get the best of me. I squatted down and opened up the doors underneath the sink, also finding nothing. I again slammed those doors and sat back on my butt throwing the box of band aids against the closed doors. "Fuck!" I rested my elbows on my bent knees and put my head in my hands taking a hard breath in. Honestly, I was mad at myself, for several reasons. One of them being that I got pulled in and I did nothing to fight back. I shouldn't have cared if they had a gun to my head. I should have done something. Which brings me to the second reason I was mad at myself. Logan, a guy I consider to be like my little brother, has been abused, sexually, physically, emotionally and I did nothing to try to stop it. I was the worst friend on this plant. The worst guy on this planet.

"Kendall…" One of his hands went on my back and his other wrapped around my neck pulling me into him. "Your heart…just relax." I lifted my head fast and dropped my hands turning to him. He wasn't crying as hard anymore but some tears were still staining his face. I moved one of my arms around him and let him dig into my side. I hugged him softly and laid my head on his as he situated next to me curling into my side.

"I'm sorry Logan. I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. I'm so sorry." He only sniffled underneath me. I lowered my leg closest to him and wiped at my face so he couldn't see the tears that were falling out of my eyes. There were no more words that I could muster that could make this okay. I couldn't say a word to my crying, hurt and tormented best friend. I couldn't even begin to give myself a pep talk on what I was going to do when Louis came into the room. I was worried I would react like when they pulled me, and do nothing. That thought mad em sad, for not only myself, but for Logan.

It couldn't have been five minutes that passed before I heard the bedroom door open. I jumped up fast, pulling Logan along with me and gracefully put him behind me standing in the doorway of the bathroom. Louis walked in, by himself, shutting and locking the door behind him. When he turned to us he slipped some keys into his jeans. "Mr. Knight. I'm so glad you could join us." Logan gripped onto my shirt in the back and is wallowed hard. "I heard some pounding up here. For a minute I was worried you were fucking my toy but then I remembered the only dick he ever wants his mine, because he's said so…so…" He took a step closer and so did I. He stopped and grinned wide. "Kendall I don't need any more blood on my hands, alright. Let's not make this difficult. The reason I brought you in here was so I could give you some guidelines. And you are going to take those guidelines to James and then to the cops. You are going to tell them Logan chose to come to me, and you are going to tell them he wants to be here and the digging around and trying find him, can stop." Logan gasped behind me and grabbed onto my arm squeezing tight.

"If you don't let him go and if you don't let him go, I'm going to …"

"To what Kendall? Kill me? Let the cops arrest me?" I swallowed hard watching the steps he was taking closer to me. "How about I put this in a way you can better understand?" He scratched his chin and shrugged. "You've seen what I can do. I did it to your stupid boyfriend." I relaxed a little and felt Logan let me go. "What if next time, I let them kill him? What if next time they fuck him and then kill him?" He took another step towards me and I looked up completely. "Or what if next time they take him? And you come to find him and they kill you both? DO you want to risk that, just for him?" I wanted to look away from him, but I couldn't. He was threatening Carlos and myself yet he looked like he was the nicest guy on the planet. I knew better. "Carlos is too weak and way too stupid to defend himself. That's why he needs you Kendall. Don't let this one…" Louis glanced over my shoulder and his face turned to stone and his eyes lit up with fire. He was giving a look to Logan that probably terrified him to death. "Be the reason you and Carlos…die." I heard something behind me that sounded like Logan and I bravely looked away from Louis to see Logan against the wall crying again, his whole body laced in fear. "See…you and I want the same thing. You want a happy relationship with Carlos and I want one with Logan."

"It's not a happy relationship if he is terrified of you." I turned back to Louis but as soon as we locked eyes I was hit. I was punched in my jaw but it wasn't just his fist. He had on brass knuckles. As I fell to the floor I heard Logan cry out stop and even as I rubbed my jaw standing back up I was hit again. Well not hit. I was kicked swiftly into my stomach making me fall back onto the floor.

"Get the fuck out of my house and spread the word that Logan is safe and happy with me or I will kill Carlos." I groaned holding around my stomach knowing if I tried to speak, it wouldn't work because my jaw was on fire. "And you! Who the fuck do you think you are?!" I saw Louis start to walk towards Logan and I did the only thing I could think of. I kicked my legs out hard hitting his legs, making him fall down. I shot up quick and while he was pushing himself I did my own kicking and kicked him hard into the face. I then moved in front of Logan who clutched onto my arm and we watched as Louis stood up spitting blood out onto the floor. He turned to us and wiped his mouth which had blood running out of it. He looked down and swallowed hard shaking his head. "Damn Knight…I can't imagine what you would have done to me on the ice." I pushed back into Logan making him cry out quietly. "Unfortunately, you just signed your boyfriends death warrant." He turned and took one step to the door, that was shoved open hard. Henry, who was breathless dropped some keys to the floor, shaking and breathing hard.

"The cops! There are like…50 cop cars out front! They have a warrant or something…they want to talk to you…they want to search the whole fucking house! We're fucked Louis!" Louise rushed to him pushed him away from the door and stepped out. With his hand on the door knob he looked back in and stared directly at me.

"Keep them quiet. Don't open this door for anything and whatever you fucking do, don't say a fucking word to anyone."


	29. Chapter 29: It's Diamond

The warmth and the safety coming from Kendall was incredible. For once in the past few days I felt like I could be saved. And standing behind Kendall helped make me finally realize I was okay. "This is your fault." I glanced around Kendall to see Henry walking towards us but Kendall stepped forward fast and grabbed around his throat. I was actually really surprised to see this side of Kendall. He's never been this physical with anyone off the ice. It was scary but I knew how necessary it was. "Let me go! Louis is going to fucking kill you!" Kendall gently shoved Henry into the wall and covered his mouth glancing back at me.

"Go pick up that key on the ground." I ran fast to it but backed away from the door just as precaution. "Louis doesn't fucking care about you. He never has, and he never will. If it isn't evident to you yet, all he wants is Logan and I can fucking guarantee you will be thrown away by him. Be smarter and keep your God damn mouth shut if you don't want your ass fucking kicked." I swallowed hard walking up behind Kendall and set a hand on his shoulder. "Logan reach in his pockets. Make sure he doesn't have anything…a knife…nothing like that." I swallowed hard hating he was asking me to do things but did anyway. I checked all his pockets only finding one small pocket knife and yanked it out backing away fast. Just as Kendall let Henry go three gun shots could be heard form down stairs. I jumped fast and let Kendall walk to me taking the knife and sliding it into jeans. He held around me and started walking us to the door.

"Please…he's…he'll kill me. He'll find out I just let you walk out and…" We both looked back at Henry who was now crying looking at us pleadingly. I didn't buy it. Not only did Louis torture me, this little dick hit me, whipped me with a leather belt. I felt no pity for him. "I didn't know it was going to get like this. You were supposed to love being with him, like I do. But you fought it. It wasn't supposed to be like this." I pushed Kendall away gently and walked to him slowly.

"He kidnapped me. He beat me. He rapped me. Why should I love a man like that?" Henry bowed his head down and cried out quietly. "I hope they kill him. I hope they put bullets in his head. And I hope they lock you up for the rest of your sick pathetic life."

"Logan…come on…" I was tugged by my arm but I pushed Kendall back and let something…angry take over me. I guess it was Kendall's presence. I lunged forward shoving Henry. He fell to the floor, crying and held the back of his head after it smacked onto the hard ground. I didn't stop there. Looking down at Henry, reminded me of all those times I was on my back, crying, begging and pleading for it to stop, much like Henry was now doing. I jumped on top of Henry and let my animalistic instincts take over. I started punching, scratching and slapping as hard and as fast as I could. I knew I was crying just as much as Henry was, because this wasn't me, but I couldn't stop. I didn't want to stop. I wanted this kid dead, just as much as I wanted Louis dead. "Logan!" I was picked up easily underneath my arms and Kendall dragged me back holding me tight. "Jesus Christ…dude…" I broke down completely, sobbing and fell limp in his arms. He didn't catch em right away and my body weight crashed into his and we fell to the floor on our butts. He moved his hands to my chest and pulled me into him hard. "Up here!" I cringed hearing Kendall's booming voice over top me and fell against him closing my eyes setting my hand son his. I heard hard fast footsteps and then a door getting forced open, but blocked a lot of it out. I kept my eyes closed and my mind blank while questions were asked and I was brought downstairs. The only thing that really made me see clear was hearing my name being yelled. This wasn't just any voice calling out for me. It was James. My eyes shot open and before I could run out to James, the doors of the ambulance were shut hard and fast. He ran to them, next to Kendall who was bleeding from his mouth and looked super pale. James's mouth was hanging open and when I sat up on the gurney, ignoring the paramedic I also let my mouth hang open staring at him. He had stiches on his head, probably form when he was hit with the bat. But what was worse was how sad he looked. I wanted to jump out of the ambulance and sit in his arms, rather than go to the hospital but the ambulance started moving and all I could do was le the paramedic, a younger looking guy push me back gently and hope I would see James soon.

I guess being out of the house and away from Louis or Henry was like the whole world lifted off my shoulders. I was able to relax, a little. The ride to the hospital, I fell asleep, listening to the paramedic tell me he was going to help me and make me feel better. That was enough for me to close my eyes and just as the sandman lulled me to a fearless sleep I felt my right sleeve get rolled up and a slight pinch, telling me he was giving me an IV. All that was okay for me and when I woke up next, I was in a hospital room, by myself, attached to a machine. My head was throbbing my mouth was dry and my stomach was growling but I felt panicked more than anything else. Someone had changed me into a hospital gown. Any other time, I wouldn't care, but considering everything that happened in the past days, the thought scared me. And even worse was that there was no one with me. No doctor, no nurse, no friends, no boyfriend, to let me know I was okay and everything was going to be okay. I almost ripped the IV out of my arm so I could try to find someone, anyone, but the door to my room opened my fast and close even faster. The person who came in took off a hood on his head and turned to me slowly. I closed my eyes fast, not really sure if I wanted to start to tell whoever it was, what happened. When I heard the person sit in the seat next to my bed I relaxed a little and almost fluttered my eyes open, but the door opened again, this time closing slowly. "Mr. Garcia. Did you just get here?"

"Uhm yeah…my boyfriend went to go pick up James."

"Oh yes…I've heard. Mr. Diamond has quite the fist on him."

"And foot." The two laughed and I secretly wished they would expand on what they were talking about.

"Well he should be waking up shortly. The pain medication should be wearing off. Before then, because you are the only one here for him, I want you to know all the tests we ran on him came back negative. He doesn't have anything wrong. I mean minus the broken ribs, and the swelling in some parts, he should be okay.

"And the…mental situation?"

"Well as much as I know about the human body and brain, I cannot confidently tell you how he is going be when he wakes up. He was tortured, raped and beaten maybe beyond repair. But don't give up hope. He will be able to get through it. He's come this far."

"I know…I just…he looks so different. Kendall said he was so scared. He also said he was acting like eh was giving up." The room went silent and I swallowed hard blinking with my eyes closed. "I've known Logan for almost 25 years and in those years, Logan has never given up on anything."

"Carlos…time will tell how Logan will react to this. And time will repair his wounds, and hopefully his soul. He's going to need you, Kendall and James to help see him through this. Even if he can't me strong, you can be. If not for yourself, please do it for him." I gently rolled my head to the side and groaned out acting as if I was just now waking up. "I think it would be best if we just talked to him about how he's feeling now, rather than what happened. We need to ease him into it, and you can help me with that until James shows up." I fluttered my eyes opened and felt relieved to see Carlos first. He set a plastic coffee cup on the small table by my bed and leaned forward smiling small. "Logan…how are you feeling?" I gently rolled my head to the other side and looked up at a doctor who was smiling down at me. "My name is doctor Michael Stormfield, and I've been taking care of you since arriving here at St. Vincent's. You have three broken ribs, a sprained and swollen right knee cap and a very bruised up back, so I'm going to ask you to keep still and remain in this bed, alright?" I nodded slowly feeling my left hand get grabbed and squeezed gently. "When we got you, you were severely dehydrated and a little malnourished. We got a drip in you to get you rehydrated and right now I'm going to have the cafeteria fix you up the biggest, fullest meal you've ever eaten. You're going to need a lot of carbs and protein. If you feel any discomfort, and pain at all, have Carlos here press that red button and we will get you help. Your safe and in good hands now Mr. Mitchell." I nodded again but swallowed hard clearing my throat.

"Doctor?" He turned back to me tucking his clipboard under his arm smiling still. "It's Diamond." My hand was squeezed again and I smiled. It was small, and not a happy smile, but I smiled. "My last name. It's…it's Diamond." The doctor smiled big and gently patted my foot.

"I'll let everyone know. Stay rested alright. I'll be right back in with some food." I nodded again and waited until the doctor was out of the room to turn to Carlos. When I did, I shamelessly let the tears roll out of my eyes. He moved in closer and wiped them carefully, probably to avoid the cuts and many bruises on my face.

"Hey kid." I laughed quietly closing my eyes bringing out my right hand form under the blanket. I slowly and painfully scratched at my chest feeling an itch and groaned softly. "You know I don't remember the last time I told you this, but I love you." I turned to him opening my eyes and we locked eyes. He smiled but blushed looking down at my bed. He squeezed my hand gently an di tried to squeeze back. The IV in my arm was making that harder. "And it's not in a…I want to cheat on my boyfriend kind of way. I love you like a brother form another mother. And you and James are the closest things I have to a family, since mine hate me for being gay. Wow…not the point…" He sighed out and looked back at me leaning on my bed. "What I'm trying to say is…seeing you come out of that house in Kendall's arms, crying, and screaming, and then seeing you put into an ambulance, absolutely killed me. And then to make it worse to watch James get put in handcuffs and in the back of a cop car…"

"What?" He stopped and turned to me, smirking.

"Oh yeah Loges…your man put up a hell of a fight." He looked down a tour hands connected and chuckled more to himself. "Kendall and a few cops tried to hold him back but when they brought Louis out in handcuffs no one could stop James. He lunged forward, grabbed Louis by the scruff of the neck and just started punching him. When they got them apart, James pushed everyone back and went in again. That time however he grabbed the back of Louis's head and bashed it against his knee. To say the least they threw him into the cop car and took him to jail with I think…2 grand bail. Kendall just went to pay it and get him out so he should be here shortly. But seeing all of it happen made me realize how much I love you two and how I do not want to lose you guys. So…the next time…not that Kendall or James will let there be a next time, I don't want you to ever walk away from me, without letting me tell you, I love you. With my whole entire heart. Alright?" I could only nod and smile blinking away the tears hoping James would get her quicker than I knew he would be.


	30. Chapter 30: Build You Back Up

Every officer I walked past was giving me a smile. No one in here was giving me a hard time. For the three hours I had to wait in that cell, no one said a word to me. They all knew. Every single one of them knew why my hand was busted and my knee was a little jacked up. Even if these guys, the ones who were in the cells with me, knew I was gay, none of them cared, which surprised me. Jail is the one place were gay men, are easily targeted. But I guess word got around about why I was there…beating the shit out of a guy who liked to hit abuse and…yeah. I guess that makes me like a superhero or something. It made me untouchable. And finally being released from jail, every guard I walked by, gave me a smile and a slight nod. I got my necklace and Logan's engagement ring back. I have been holding onto it since Carlos gave it to me in the hospital. And then I was escorted out of the jail and walked out into the dark parking lot. I spotted Kendall's car and walked to it briskly seeing him sitting on the hood sipping form a large Starbucks cup. When I got closer he slid off the hood and smirked reaching behind him an grabbing another cup. "Hey Mayweather." I smiled and took the cup form him downing at least half of it. I was parched, but only because I was nervous. I wanted to see Logan. "I fear if I hadn't pulled you off him with the help of those cops I wouldn't have been able to bail you out." I frowned walking to the passenger door and got in while he did.

"No one should have pulled me off. You should have let me kill him."

"Ahh I see. So you are mentally unstable." I turned to him fast and he slammed his door sliding the key in the ignition. Before turning the car on, he turned to me shaking his head. "Couple things…you see this?" He pointed to his bruised, and swollen jaw on the right side. "I wanted to kill him to. I want him dead actually. But I know if I had done serious damage to him, not only would I have ruined the rest of my life cause it would be spent in prison, I would ruin Carlos's, and maybe even you and Logan. There are more important things in this world then getting revenge. I mean the guy tied me up and hit me. I want him dead too. But you need to be here for Logan, and you can't be there for him if you are sitting in a prison cell." I sat back against my seat and sipped form my drink slowly. "He's safe now James. He's going to stay safe. Just…be with him and don't think another second about that scum bag alright?" I nodded looking out my window and he started the car. "Carlos said he's been pretty quiet, not really saying much to anyone. He isn't eating all that much either. He isn't complaining about pain thought which I guess is a good thing." I nodded again knowing why he wasn't complaining about pain wasn't because he wasn't feeling much. He just didn't want people to worry and I know the first conversation we would have when I saw him would be him asking me to get him out of the hospital. For a guy who loves medicine and anything to do with medicine, he hates hospitals. One of the reasons he didn't go to med school.

The jail is so much further away from the hospital then I ever realized. I was a little impatient, I'll admit, but the distance is really astonishing. It was a little after midnight when we finally got to the hospital, and I wasn't sure if they would let me in to see him. Visiting hours might be over. But Kendall walked me through the hospital like he owned the place. And when we finally stopped in front of a door, he pushed it open, not knocking or waiting for a doctor to say we could. I almost pushed him down just to get in the room but just as I saw Logan and opened my mouth Carlos jumped up from his seat and walked to us putting a finger on his lips. "He just fell asleep. He tried to fight me, the doctor, the pain medicine, but he fell asleep. He needs it." His voice was soft and very quiet making me nod and slowly and quietly walk to the seat Carlos was just in. I thought it was going to be easy to see him, knowing he was finally safe and with me, but it wasn't. It actually was really hard to see him. He looked scared still. He was sound asleep but I could tell how upset and afraid he was. And I could easily tell he was in pain. I just knew him. It hurt me so bad to see the cuts and bruises, but it was worse knowing there was knowing I could have down to fix all of it. And there probably won't be anything I can do to make him feel better. Ever. "Hey baby…take me to get some food? I'm hungry and James probably is too, so let's…let's give him some time." I saw Kendall wrap around Carlos and both headed to the door. "Love ya you big lug! Call us if you need us." I only nodded scooting to the edge of my chair and gently setting my hand on Logan's. I heard the door close softly but only cared about the pale face of the love of my life in front of me. I carefully laced two of my fingers with him and raised my other hand to his head. As soon as my hand touched his forehead, his eyes opened. I pulled away from him, worried I had hurt him in some way. He smiled at this and slowly looked around the room.

"Gosh I thought they would never leave."

"I thought you were asleep." He chuckled and rolled his head softly to me shaking it.

"I closed my eyes and breathed heavily so my doctor and Carlos would think I was, so when you came, it could just be me and you." He was talking with a slight slur and he wasn't really making any sense so I knew the medicine was at least working. "Did it feel good?" I gently set my hand back on his and again reached up to touch his forehead. When I did he closed his eyes and turned his hand palm up lacing our fingers together. He squeezed gently. "Did it feel good James?"

"Did what fell good?"

"Hitting Louis." I swallowed hard and looked down at our connected hands.

"Did it feel good hitting Henry?"

"No." II looked back up at his face and gently stood up. I let his hand go, put both my hands outside his head and leaned down gently kissing his nose. "I'm no good anymore." I moved my lisp to his forehead, squeezed my eyes shut hard and clenched the pillow case under his head. "I'm no good for you anymore. I'm not worthy of you anymore. I fear I never was worthy of you."

"Logan you need to sleep." I pulled away fast and sat back completely in my chair wiping under my eyes not looking at him. "You're medicine is making you talk like this and I don't like it, so just get some sleep and we'll talk in the morning."

"James tell me you don't want me anymore, and tell me I'm no good, because I know that's what you want to tell me." I turned to him fast and saw I wasn't the only one crying. "Tell me I disgust you, and I'm worthless! Tell me I deserved everything I got!" I jumped up fast and reached down for his shoulder. He gasped, shut his eyes and cried out loudly. I backed away quick and ran into the chair making me sit back down. "Tell me you don't love me!" He wiped his face roughly, making him hiss at the pain of touching his cuts and bruises. "Tell me!"

"I love you Logan." My voice was calm and cool compared to Logan's which was high, loud and hurt. My voice made me look to me and cry more quietly. "Everything that man said to you, did to you was to break you down and hurt you. He succeeded." He turned away from me, actually turning his body and cried out. "But everything I do for you, I say to you, is to make you happy and to build you back up. I love you Logan, nothing, especially what the sick fuck did, is going to change how much I love you. SO you're…you're just going to get some sleep and you're going to get better and then we're gonna get married. Just like you said. We'll go up to that lake and we'll get married and then we'll live the rest of our lives together, okay?" He cried again, sobbed, but he nodded his head I got up slowly and even slower I walked around his bed and got right beside him, facing him. I dropped to my knees gently and set one hand on the side of his face and grabbed both his hands with the other. We locked eyes and he sniffled, calming himself down. He pulled one of his hands out form mine and put it on my face cupping my cheek gently. "I love you Logan." He closed his eyes scooting closer on his bed to me. I leaned in kissing his forehead gently, but slowly leaned back on my legs. My knee hurt and I was a little hungry, but watching him wipe his face, yawn a little and snuggle onto his bed. I gently laid my head onto his arm and closed my eyes, also yawning. I knew in my head, it was going to be a long process of fixing him, but I was willing to do it. All in the name of love.

I fell asleep hard. And way too long. I at first did nothing when I woke up, mostly because my body was sore, and my heart, my chest, felt heavy. I kept my eyes closed and let the soft warm hand running through my hair, wake me up a little. I knew it was Logan's hand and I knew if I made one sudden movement he would know I was awake and I would have to face him again. Except this time I would probably have to hear about what happened to him, by him. It was hard enough hearing it from the cops and Kendall. Hearing Logan say it would be hell. "Seriously…we should wake him up. His knee is already fucked up and this is probably making it worse."

"Leave him Kendall. He looks peaceful."

"He's going to be sore." The room went quiet and before either of them could say another word I woke myself up. I raised my head slowly and of course heard my back crack in about five different places. It probably wasn't the best idea to sleep on my knees, my legs bent, on the floor with my shoulder and neck bent, lying on Logan's bed. But you live and you learn.

"Good job punk. You woke him."

"You were talking just as loud as I was." I grinned looking at Logan's face which was still in the same position form last night. He was on his side still with one hand under his head, while the other stayed on my own head. "I love you buddy, but you snore. Bad." I flipped Kendall off over my shoulder and very carefully I pushed myself up, yawning. "There are some doughnuts over there, and a cup of coffee. Black. I know how you like it." I leaned down kissing the side of Logan's head softly and closed my eyes inhaling quietly. "So Logan broke Carlos down. He's having him ask if he can leave today."

"Kendall you said you wouldn't rat me out." I pushed myself back up and smiled softly down at Logan who was holding around one of my arms. He wasn't looking at me, probably because he thought I was going to get mad at him. Like last night, when I went to grab him. He backed away and cried out, as if I was going to hit him. That killed me. And it killed me to know I was going to have to very gently and careful around him. At least until he got back to being my Logan. "I just want to go home."

"You don't have a home." I turned fast and glared at Kendall who looked around fast realizing what he said and looked at the floor blushing. I gracefully lifted my foot and kicked his shin making him look at me. "I'm going to go help Carlos convince the doctor to let you leave, and then we'll take you guys to our house." I continued staring at him as he walked out of the room quickly, leaving the door open. When I looked back at Logan his eyes were closed and he was tracing a little design on my arm he was still holding onto.

"I don't want you in here either." He turned to me fast and I smiled small. "But if the doctor thinks you need to be in here a little longer, I want you to. I just want you better and I know being here can make you better." He closed his eyes again and laid back letting my arm go. I sighed softly and straightened out completely stretching my back a little.

"Mr. Garcia!" I turned to the door and watched Carlos saunter in all smiles. Behind him looked an irritated doctor and behind him was Kendall, who was also all smiles. "I understand your worry for Mr. Diamond…"

"Actually I don't think you do." Carlos sat on the edge of Logan's bed and stared the doctor down. "He hate sit here, he fights you on everything you say because he knows how to make himself better, so why not let him go home where he's happy and corporative?" The doctor stared at Carlos before turning to me. I smiled and extended my hand, letting him shake it.

"The fiancée right? James?" I nodded again and he sighed out walking to the other side of Logan's bed and setting his clipboard down. "Well James, my name is Doctor Michael Stormfeild and I have been taking care of Logan." Logan rolled onto his back and looked up at his doctor with pleading eyes. He wouldn't look at me. "It is my professional opinion that he needs to be in this hospital bed for at least another week."

"Dr. Stormfeild…" Logan tried pleading but the doctor shook his head.

"Logan you need to heal properly." I cleared my throat softly grabbing Logan's hand whether he liked it or not.

"If I may…I mean…you technically have no right to keep him here. He's not in critical condition so he doesn't need to be here." I saw Logan turn to me and smile small. I squeezed his hand and shrugged. "Myself, my friends, and Logan's infinite knowledge on health and medicine, can help Logan get better. I know if something is seriously wrong with Logan, I'll bring him back. And if you want we can come back when you want him to, to do a checkup. But Carlos has a point. He isn't happy here, or being corporative. So why don't we just help everyone out in the situation." The doctor glanced around the room, looking at all of us. He stopped on me grabbed the clipboard and shook his head.

"You guys have been through hell. I can see that. I'm a doctor, I try to make people feel better. And if I can't' do that, then I guess…I have to let someone else try." My hand was squeezed gently and I looked down at Logan as the doctor started to write something. "I'm going to write up three prescriptions for you, get your ribs better wrapped and then you will be released in an hour. And I'm going to get these written up." He walked to the door and stepped out quick, grumbling to himself. Logan smiled big up at me and pushed himself up in his bed.

"Thank you James. You know I don't like hospitals." I nodded softly and watched him take a cup of coffee from Carlos. He had a smile on his face as he sipped his hot coffee but I knew better. I knew something was off, in his head. He was not the same Logan I knew and I don't know when I'm going to ever see that same Logan again.


	31. Chapter 31: Nothing to Apologize For

It was like looking at people I didn't even know. They were talking to me, and they were smiling at me, but I didn't recognize them. I think I was experiencing that however, because I didn't recognize myself. I could look in the mirror, hear my voice or run my fingers through my hair, but I had no idea who this guy was. Which for some reason, made me really angry. I was irritable, and I found silence, and being alone, a lot easier than being social. Sometimes I couldn't get that chance to be anti-social. Sometimes because of the people who were constantly worrying about me, would not let me out of their sights. I'm not sure if since I got out of the hospital a week ago anyone has noticed my drastic behavioral changes, but I have changed. Besides the not talking, as often as I used to anyway, and not wanting to be around anyone, I haven't eaten a solid meal, I don't have the energy to change into clothes, besides sweats and plain t shirts, and more importantly to me, I am not happy. Nothing that used to make me happy and smile, is doing the exact opposite. One of those things that seem to be a trigger in my head, has been James. And I'm not even upset by that which in itself, is frustrating.

James has been great and wonderful and sweet, giving me space, and my own freedom to deal with things in my own time, but it is for that exact reason he is frustrating me, and making me upset. I want him to grab me by my face, look me dead in the eyes and as me to talk to him. Ask me to tell him how I'm feeling, and how I'm doing. Honestly. I believe it would help me. To know he's there, that he wants to help, would help me. But he's not doing it. He's practically pushing me away. And the more time we spend with Kendall and Carlos that idea, that he is pushing me away, becomes more evident. Him and Kendall are always going off together and giving each other odd looks…sharing secrets. Like now, at the dinner table. Kendall and James are talking about some football game that they just watched and are laughing and joking about it. Neither of them have said a word to me, or asked me if I was feeling okay, because I haven't even picked up my fork. I haven't even looked at my plate full of food Carlos made, I just sat next to James, hugging around my legs and stared off into space. I caught myself looking at the blank wall behind Carlos's head, because he was right across from me, and when I looked away from the wall I saw him staring at me. He looked genuinely worried, but just like the other two, especially James, he wouldn't say anything to me. It was like they were afraid to talk to me. TO look at me. Come near me. I mean Jesus…I get it. I'm pathetic and gross but you don't have to shove it in my face. "Are you not hungry Logan?" I continued staring at Carlos noticing as soon as he spoke James and Kendall stopped talking. He swallowed hard, glanced down at my full plate in front of me and smile small. "I can take your plate back in the kitchen if you…"

"I'm fine Los." I gave a friendly small, which was genuine and he looked down quick setting his fork down, cheeks turning red. I heard Kendall sigh beside Carlos and even saw him put his arm around his shoulders, but I did not turn to look at Kendall. Every time we looked at each other, all I felt was judgment.

"So we were talking earlier about going to the beach tomorrow. It's supposed to be cloudy and overcast but it could be fun." I turned my head completely away from the three people around me and looked out at Kendall and Carlos's huge living room, which was being used as a bedroom for James and I. I trust my best friends but I'm not comfortable being a closed room, just yet.

"Yeah…sounds good. Loges?" I shrugged softly and laid my head on my knee looking at the couch that James and I slept on last night, and wished I could crawl on it right now and sleep the rest of the night away. James hand rubbed gently on my back making me grit my teeth so I didn't scream out in pain.

"You know I think you should be eating something Logan." I stayed motionless and quiet knowing if I looked at Kendall, or if I opened my mouth, I would start tearing Kendall apart. I didn't have the energy for that right now. "You're worrying us Logan. You're dropping a lot of weight." I closed my eyes still staying quiet and kept myself calmed down.

"Logan…I don't like…I don't like seeing you like this Logan. I'm worried about you." Hearing it form Kendall was irritating. Hearing it from Carlos was heartbreaking. I quickly got off my chair and walked ot the bathroom downstairs fast, hoping no one followed. I got myself in the bathroom, shut and locked the door all before I slid against it, falling onto the floor, crying. This wasn't a new thing for me. For the week I've been here, the bathroom and the shower more specifically were the best places for me to be alone. And whenever I was in here, I would usually cry until I felt better. Now was no exception.

I hated myself. I hated this guy I had turned into. I was thinking one thing, and doing the other. I feared the three people who were trying to help me, were only doing it out of pity, while wishing and hoping one of them would grab me, hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay. I wanted to open up and talk about my heartache and pain, but I didn't want anyone to look at me, or treat me any differently. I was smiling and feeling happy at one moment, while the next, I heard one sound, or see one thing, and I'm running away to the bathroom to cry for a solid hour. I wasn't okay. I was healing, physically, but the thought of Louis, what he did to me, what he still could do to me, was always haunting my head and a few words he always told me were the absolute death of me. I am disgusting. No one would ever love me again. I am nothing more than a grain of sand, and no one wants me. He was constantly telling em these things while he forced himself inside me. It was three days. Three long, horrible days. That was all it took to break em down. The beatings and the rape were a contributing factor, but it were those words that were the hardest things to get over. If you hear something enough, you start to believe it. And for someone like me, who over thinks every little detail of his life, hearing those words tend to cut right down to the core. James giving me my space and time to heal didn't help. Did he think I was disgusting? Did he want someone better? Was I waste of breath? Life? Is that why he was pushing em away? Or…was he even pushing em away and I was just making up excuses for my shitty mood and behavior? Did I have a good reason to act like a dick? Or should I just put on my big boy pants and move on?

My crying session lasted shorter than usual. I got myself up, washed my face off, and braced myself for any argument that might in sue once I stepped back out to my family. I had to take all the words they were going to tell me, and be okay with it, because I honestly believe they want to help me, and want me better. I think anyway. Except when I walked out into the dining room, it was empty. The only thing that was in the dining room, was my plate of full food on the table. I swallowed hard and walked to it. Dinner tonight was burgers grilled by Kendall and fries and a fruit salad made my Carlos. As I picked up my plate I grabbed a fry and chewed on it as I walked into the kitchen. I stopped right by Carlos, who was by himself in front of the sink doing dishes. I turned to him leaning against the counter top finishing my fry and felt a heavy rain cloud go over my heart seeing the tears fresh on his cheeks. "I'm sorry Carlos."

"You shouldn't be." I looked down fast and hugged around my body swallowing my fry. "You have done nothing to apologize for."

"I'm making you cry."

"Yeah…because you aren't yourself Logan. I miss you." He wiped his cheek on his shoulder as he put a plate in the sink. He spotted my plate and while I looked up, we locked eyes. "I left your plat eon the table because you have to eat."

"I don't have to eat. I'm not sick or anything. I just wasn't hungry tonight."

"Or last night, or yesterday morning, or the day before that." I swallowed hard holding my broken ribs gently and picked up my breathing. "I cannot take this anymore Logan. We are walking around on egg shells around you for your benefit. The least you can do is tell us when you're feeling sad, or angry, or happy. No one in this house is going to be happy until you are."

"Carlos I am never happy." He slouched a bit and I quickly wiped at my face bowing my head down. "You don't know what thoughts run through my head and you don't see the world as I see it. I use to see the world in color, and now it is all black and white. I can never be happy again." He turned quick to the sink and turned off the water throwing the sponge into the half full sink, angrily. I cautiously reached out, touching his shoulder and he jerked away slamming the dishwasher closed. I jumped back and dropped my mouth open watching him. He turned to me, now full on crying and shook his head.

"Then I'm not going to waste anymore of my time or energy. You don't want help, because the world is so fucking glum and bad, then why should I try? Why should James try?"

"James has been trying? That's news to me." I swear I saw his jaw twitch as he wiped his face and walked out of the kitchen, leaving me alone. I turned and watched him all the way to the sliding glass door. I then noticed James and Kendall sitting on the table out there with a beer in front of each of them. I pushed off the counter and followed out after Carlos grabbing James's sweater on the back of the couch on my way. I gently pushed the door open and looked to James, who was watching me closely. I ignored Carlos out on the huge lawn, close to the edge of their backyard looking down at Beverly Hills knowing he probably said something to them about our talk, or they at least knew he was crying. When I stepped out onto the porch I walked slowly to James pulling his sweater over my head and too the seat next to him.

"Everything okay?" James hand went on my knee and he squeezed gently. I smiled small and nodded looking up at his beautiful face.

"So why is he so upset?" I turned to Kendall and shrugged swiftly playing with my hands in the big pocket in the front of the sweater. "Oh…so you were just in the house with him, by yourselves, and you don't know what's wrong with him?"

"Kendall…" Kendall and James turned to each other and while James gave him a warning look Kendall chuckled and pushed himself up in his seat.

"Yeah…sorry. Why don't I go find out myself and when we come back we'll play some cards or something." I looked up at James who nodded and smiled at Kendall, bit when Kendall had his back to us, James's smile fell and he grabbed his beer, drinking at least half of it. I waited until he set his beer bottle back on the table, before even thinking of what to say but he already had an idea.

"Logan…is it easy to talk to me about what you're going through?" I swallowed hard looking down a this hand still on my knee and softly shook my head. "Why?" I shrugged fast and he sighed squeezing my leg. "Okay...then I'm going to ask you to do something for me." I closed my eyes hard and knew exactly where this was going. "I want you to talk to someone…a doctor, or a therapist. Someone who can maybe help you work something's out, help you open up to me. Unless…we can actually talk about your fears and thoughts right now. If you feel comfortable opening up to me, then I'm all ears." I shook my head quickly having a fear if I spoke to him about my thoughts, he would just say I am worthless and he doesn't want me. SO maybe having a professional help me with that would be better. "Okay...we'll find someone tomorrow. In the meantime, don't worry about Kendall and Carlos. Worry about yourself. Nothing else."


End file.
